Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad

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- IslamMythology
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Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
OP - April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM

This is a riot, I thought you guys might enjoy this. : )

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJEwhWJjyjU

* When Muhammad came out of the womb he came out on his hands and knees and immediately fell into sujud to Allah and he raised his finger up to Allah to signify his message of Tawheed lol. (He then got up and said, 'Your clothes, give them to me' lol).

* Then Muhammad's little infant body suddenly disappeared and reappeared, twice. He had been taken to the furtherest direction East and the furthest direction West. (Arabs of the time were obsessed with this further east and further west stuff).

*When Muhammad came out of the womb he sneezed (usually babies cry because satan touches them) and when Muhammad sneezed a voice from an invisible being said, 'May Allah have mercy on you'. (Imagine if your newborn sneezed and the thin air next to you said 'God Bless You' lol).

* When Muhammad was born he came out with kuhl on his eyes, his umbilical cord was already cut, and he was already circumcized! Ta daaa!

* The Heavens and the Earth, and all of the seats of the thrones of the kings of the Earth shook during the hour of his birth. And Caesar's castle in Rome shook until it was broken. 14 of his balconies actually fell. (Only 14? lol)

* The Persian fire that the Magians used to worship, which had been kept burning for 1,000 years (so they say), was put out by Allah when Muhammad was born.

* A lake dried up and a dry valley was flooded with water (by Allah) at the time of Muhammad's birth, as a sign.

* All 360 idols of the Ka'ba, despite being planted into the Earth with iron and lead, fell on their faces when Muhammad was born. (I wonder if they fell simultaneously? That would have been pretty to see from up high somewhere...).

* All the beasts of Quraysh spoke in a pure Arabic tongue and said, 'the final Messenger has been born, the seal of all Prophets'. (Thank you my pet cow. Keep that news coming will ya. Boy am I glad I bought this cow...).

Great stuff, hope you enjoy lol. : )
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #1 - April 01, 2010, 09:30 AM

Brilliant - I remember sitting in circles where people read out this sort of crap - I used to feel like walking out even in those days - but there was some Chicken Biryani to come and I didn't want to miss that

At least Muhammad got one thing right

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM
he raised his finger up to Allah
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #2 - April 01, 2010, 09:43 AM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM
* All the beasts of Quraysh spoke in a pure Arabic tongue and said, 'the final Messenger has been born, the seal of all Prophets'.

Like fuck did they

Sure, all this happened, and then some cow went around telling people why it was happening; and yet they STILL denied the messenger of God? Bastards! Pagans, Jews, and Christians truly ARE evil!

Zionist pig dog apes.

I don't come here any more due to unfair moderation.
http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?topic=30785
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #3 - April 01, 2010, 10:30 AM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM
* When Muhammad came out of the womb he came out on his hands and knees and immediately fell into sujud to Allah and he raised his finger up to Allah to signify his message of Tawheed lol. (He then got up and said, 'Your clothes, give them to me' lol).

Especially liked this one. Great Terminator reference. Made me laugh out loud.

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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #4 - April 01, 2010, 11:03 AM

Quote from: Aziz on April 01, 2010, 10:30 AM
Especially liked this one. Great Terminator reference. Made me laugh out loud.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qKs7SeCoKE
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #5 - April 01, 2010, 11:07 AM

Muslims made Muhammad more or less have the same power and grandeur as Allah.

Pakistan Zindabad? ya Pakistan sey Zinda bhaag?

Long Live Pakistan? Or run with your lives from Pakistan?
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #6 - April 01, 2010, 11:19 AM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM
* The Heavens and the Earth, and all of the seats of the thrones of the kings of the Earth shook during the hour of his birth. And Caesar's castle in Rome shook until it was broken. 14 of his balconies actually fell. (Only 14? lol)

Lol! The famous Caesar's castle in Rome! :\
When the Roman Empire was not even there anymore. And castles were yet to be built.

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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #7 - April 01, 2010, 11:31 AM

Quote from: atheist.pk on April 01, 2010, 11:07 AM
Muslims made Muhammad more or less have the same power and grandeur as Allah.

Correctomundo. As much as they deny it, Islam sometimes resembles a cult of worship of one man.

"we can smell traitors and country haters"

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Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #8 - April 01, 2010, 11:56 AM

Quote from: Tlaloc on April 01, 2010, 11:19 AM
Lol! The famous Caesar's castle in Rome! :\

Isn't that Caesar's Castle and Casino?
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #9 - April 01, 2010, 02:08 PM

Funny, the same shit happened when I was born.

Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #10 - April 01, 2010, 04:26 PM

Quote from: Iblis
"Come here, Muslim, there is a Jew hiding himself behind me; kill him" ~ Talking rock

Rocks not only talk, they steal. You should add the one about the rock stealing Moses clothes
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #11 - April 01, 2010, 04:29 PM

Look at the guy on the left in the first post. Doesn't he look like he has pubic hair on his chin?? Could he possibly have "balls on chin" syndrome??
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #12 - April 01, 2010, 04:31 PM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM

* All the beasts of Quraysh spoke in a pure Arabic tongue and said, 'the final Messenger has been born, the seal of all Prophets'. (Thank you my pet cow. Keep that news coming will ya. Boy am I glad I bought this cow...).

Great stuff, hope you enjoy lol. : )

And the cow said "Mo" instead of "Moo". A miracle!!!
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #13 - April 01, 2010, 05:17 PM

nonsense at its best. Muslims
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #14 - April 01, 2010, 07:29 PM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM

* When Muhammad came out of the womb he came out on his hands and knees and immediately fell into sujud to Allah and he raised his finger up to Allah to signify his message of Tawheed lol. (He then got up and said, 'Your clothes, give them to me' lol).

Quote
* Then Muhammad's little infant body suddenly disappeared and reappeared, twice. He had been taken to the furtherest direction East and the furthest direction West.

Wouldn't that be the same place anyway? What was the point in going twice? Seems like a waste of Allah power to me. He could have spent it torturing people in hell.....
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #15 - April 01, 2010, 07:36 PM

Quote from: Prince Spinoza on April 01, 2010, 07:29 PM
Wouldn't that be the same place anyway?

Not in case the earth is flat.
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #16 - April 01, 2010, 07:42 PM

Quote from: IslamMythology on April 01, 2010, 09:23 AM
... he raised his finger(s) up to Allah

fuck-off.jpg (71.98 KB, 400x450 - viewed 432 times.)
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #17 - April 01, 2010, 09:16 PM

Quote from: Prince Spinoza on April 01, 2010, 07:29 PM
Wouldn't that be the same place anyway? What was the point in going twice?

That tells you a lot about how the world was perceived when this stuff was written down. They obviously did not realise that the world was spherical.

What is even more interesting is Muslims today repeating it without realising that it assumes a flat Earth. I would suggest plainly making this point if you ever encounter a Muslim saying this stuff. It should provoke some amusing reactions.

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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #18 - November 06, 2010, 12:24 PM

Bump for one of the funniest threads in a while.
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Re: Gems from Islamic Mythology: The Birth of Muhammad
Reply #19 - November 06, 2010, 01:04 PM

Man why do they do this? Like seriously. Don't they see how comical it is?
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