From reading the various Hadith collections and incidents in Muhammad's life it becomes apparent that in those days a women's consent for sex was deemed completely irrelevant and a non-issue. Hence there are hadith that say a wife cannot refuse her husband access unless it is her time of the month. I know Saudi even today doesn't recognise rape as a crime because it doesn't accept the concept of womens consent.
Is this true, does Islam not consider a women's consent important? Is this how most Muslims in the Muslim world feel too or is it just Arabs?
I found these Hadiths regarding the issue:
Muhammad said: "If a husband calls his wife to his bed (i.e. to have sexual relation) and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till morning." -- Bukhari 4.54.460
In another hadith, Muhammad says: "By him in Whose Hand lies my life, a woman can not carry out the right of her Lord, till she carries out the right of her husband. And if he asks her to surrender herself (to him for sexual intercourse) she should not refuse him even if she is on a camel's saddle." -- Ibn Majah 1854
Bukhari the most authentic collection of Hadiths considers it wrong on the part of the wife to refuse her husband sex, Ibn Majah, who's hadiths are less important, is far more explicit in stating that a woman shouldn't refuse her husband's sexual demands at any place or any time-& Muhammad or Ibn Majah illustrate the point by stating that she cannot refuse even when she's astride a camel.
Regarding what most Muslims believe- Muslim men believing in gender equality & holding the belief that Islam is an egalitarian faith will find ways to filter out or explain away these sexist Hadiths-while horny,sexist Muslim men & husbands will use these as their justification to demand sex anytime, though this type of sexist Hadiths will always act as an impediment to criminalizing marital rape & encourage sexist men to insist that wives not refuse them.
Heard of the ditty, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" Marriage was regarded down the ages as a cold, calculating transaction between women who wanted a husband & his money and men who wanted a wife to have sex. This was repeated by grandmoms & moms to young ladies warning them that if they had pre marital sex with a man, she wasn't going to end up with a ring on her finger!
However, it is important to note that marital rape wasn't criminalized even in Western nations some decades back, & still isn't criminalized in many non Muslim nations, so the belief that once you buy the cow, you can demand milk anytime was held in most societies & still held in many societies, irrespective of religion.
Mo couldn't take a second wife as long as Khadijah was alive, he also didn't dare fool around with her slave girl like he did later- how would Khadijah respond if he demanded sex when she was astride a camel? In all probably she'd sternly say "
or I'll divorce you without any alimony & he'd
Topic: A Woman's consent - does it matter