Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit

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Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
OP - December 27, 2009, 12:28 AM

What I mean by this topic is that ever since I have left Islam, I sometimes get this feeling of emptiness. I understand that we do not need religion to give us a purpose in life, we can make up our own purpose of why we are here. I was wondering if u guys ever felt lost since leaving your religion or ever felt lost on the issue concerning what is the basis of your morality. I guess I get a feeling of goodness inside of me when I help someone out and it in a way makes me happier but isn't this essentially then an arrogant motive for doing good. Maybe in a sense?

Just a random thought I had. Please feel free to comment and share your thoughts.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #1 - December 27, 2009, 12:49 AM

I did at first - its natural once you lose the baggage and well defined sense of purpose of Islam. Reminds me of losing a loved one, but getting over it is something that takes time and after mental re-engineering.

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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #2 - December 27, 2009, 01:02 AM

Quote from: IsLame on December 27, 2009, 12:49 AM
I did at first - its natural once you lose the baggage and well defined sense of purpose of Islam. Reminds me of losing a loved one, but getting over it is something that takes time and after mental re-engineering.

Ye that's exactly how it feels. I just sometimes wish I had all the answers but then again that would render life virtually meaningless. But your right, 'time is the healer of all things' or so the saying goes.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #3 - December 27, 2009, 01:09 AM

I feel the same way. That's why I haven't submitted my name to Kuffar list Even though I probably am, which sucks since I grew up with that term being extremely ugly, and murtad is like x10 ugly. I'm terrified of going back to Islam and becoming religious again. It sounds irrational I know. I'd hate myself if I did that. Going back and forth I don't want to be that person. I fear some emotional anxiety would hit me and I'd start praying again even though I honestly can't defend my religion anymore. There is nothing that was divinely guarded or protected. The way the Quran was compiled, the way the Sira was compiled or the hadiths. They have all been tampered with and burned and edited by mere mortals. And for their own selfish reasons of protecting the Ummah and keeping the "divine" sacred.
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #4 - December 27, 2009, 01:18 AM

Reminds me when my older cousin challenged me to declare my apostacy many times, after debating the quran with him. I didnt at first, because it is a very difficult step - you cant retract a big statement like that so its not done easily. However I knew the bubble would burst eventually, and felt it was inconsequential because I already felt that, I was already that and time proved t was irreversible, feelings were jus getting stronger no matter how much I analysed it.

After a while I couldnt stand the bit in the middle so I eventually told him, he was dumbfounded.

Once its done (check introduction threads) within the first few seconds I went through shock, fear but then the feeling of freedom just swept through my mind. Difficult to put into words, but I suddenly there was this whole new world (not geographically but mentally) for me to explore.

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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #5 - December 27, 2009, 01:24 AM

Ye man. Praying for me was not about worshipping a higher divine that much, but more about me having that time to meditate on some philosophical issues and just thinking about them and thinking at the time God has an answer prepared for such questions once i reach heaven gave me an inner peace, even though it was just major self-delusion. Religion in a way is something cling on to and now I feel very lonely at times and confused. Oh well I don't want to get emotional again otherwise I'll drone on but ye that's the deal here. I always had problems with Islam but lived by a the few wise verses there were and shaped my life surrounding that. I'm a sceptic. Ye your experience regarding the 'whole new world' part resonates with me. I ponder a lot on this kind of shit though. It's almost detrimental to my mental health.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #6 - December 27, 2009, 01:26 AM

@Islame
What arguments did he use? When discussing Islam with you?
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #7 - December 27, 2009, 01:28 AM

Quote from: Heyjustlooking on December 27, 2009, 01:24 AM
Ye man. Praying for me was not about worshipping a higher divine that much, but more about me having that time to meditate on some philosophical issues and just thinking about them and thinking at the time God has an answer prepared for such questions once i reach heaven gave me an inner peace, even though it was just major self-delusion. Religion in a way is something cling on to and now I feel very lonely at times and confused. Oh well I don't want to get emotional again otherwise I'll drone on but ye that's the deal here. I always had problems with Islam but lived by a the few wise verses there were and shaped my life surrounding that. I'm a sceptic. Ye your experience regarding the 'whole new world' part resonates with me. I ponder a lot on this kind of shit though. It's almost detrimental to my mental health.

I used to do that. Think too much. But I think one needs to mix it up with fun as well. And try to relax
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #8 - December 27, 2009, 01:30 AM

Quote from: BlackDog on December 27, 2009, 01:28 AM
I used to do that. Think too much. But I think one needs to mix it up with fun as well. And try to relax

I need 2 get a fucking life. lol.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #9 - December 27, 2009, 01:31 AM

ROTFL
- Saif Rahman
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #10 - December 27, 2009, 01:31 AM

Quote from: Heyjustlooking on December 27, 2009, 01:24 AM
Ye man. Praying for me was not about worshipping a higher divine that much, but more about me having that time to meditate on some philosophical issues and just thinking about them and thinking at the time God has an answer prepared for such questions once i reach heaven gave me an inner peace, even though it was just major self-delusion. Religion in a way is something cling on to and now I feel very lonely at times and confused. Oh well I don't want to get emotional again otherwise I'll drone on but ye that's the deal here. I always had problems with Islam but lived by a the few wise verses there were and shaped my life surrounding that. I'm a sceptic. Ye your experience regarding the 'whole new world' part resonates with me. I ponder a lot on this kind of shit though. It's almost detrimental to my mental health.

Look, big changes in life take time to take stock & reevaluate- you have been through such big changes since your time here. You'll be fine

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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #11 - December 27, 2009, 01:36 AM

Quote from: IsLame on December 27, 2009, 01:31 AM
Look, big changes in life take time to evaluate and restock - you have been through such big changes since your time here. You'll be fine

Ye thanks 4 the words of wisdom. Much appreciated.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #12 - December 27, 2009, 01:40 AM

Between work, gaming, net, working out, and chasin' ass, I simply don't have the time to consider the purpose of life. I'm frankly too materialistically and hedonistically content to give a flying fuck about what my moral purpose to all this is.

Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #13 - December 27, 2009, 01:40 AM

Quote from: BlackDog on December 27, 2009, 01:26 AM
@Islame
What arguments did he use? When discussing Islam with you?

Usual bollocks - it was harder for me as I had not heard of anyone else who had left Islam before (there were no sites like this either), so I went through all the soul-destroying thoughts that there had to be something wrong with me. It was only later that I realised this was true lol

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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #14 - December 27, 2009, 01:45 AM

Quote from: Kafirist on December 27, 2009, 01:40 AM
Between work, gaming, net, working out, and chasin' ass, I simply don't have the time to consider the purpose of life. I'm frankly too materialistically and hedonistically content to give a flying fuck about what my moral purpose to all this is.

You see Kafirist I want to be like that. I like gaming too and girls. I can be materialistic most of my friends are but I have missed out a lot on life just because I think about this shit too much. Blackdog was right need let loose like a motherfucker.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #15 - December 27, 2009, 01:53 AM

Well I went through a bit of a depressed 'lost' period too. For about almost a year actually. It was quite a difference for me because I did not leave my Islamic lifestyle gradually so for like 6-7 years I had been a fairly strict practicing muslim and then in literally one day I stopped everything. At first it was liberating but later I began feeling 'lost'. This was made worse by the fact that in my last year on uni I started drinking heavily and also lost all my friends because of my increasingly vocal heresy and apostacy.

So yeah, maybe you're a newly 'free' and just kind of trying to find a new mindset? What you should realize that nothing in life is changed, so I've always been a driven person and I quickly went back to my goal-oriented mindset that I had even as a muslim and simply added some new goals and took out some older practices. One of the first things I did was to actually ask a girl out and lose my virginity. That goal alone should keep you fairly busy.

Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #16 - December 27, 2009, 07:03 AM

I really don't think there is a defining moment where one says to themselves that "right I am now an apostate". It's fairly gradual and you come to a point where the apologetics you might have been given by muslims or even thought up yourself, to deal with the doubts just don't cut it anymore and you see right through them. You might just ask yourself at some point "do I really believe all this?" and you will finally just admit to yourself that "no I don't". The doubts might have been languising for ages but your admittance might have taken longer for you to acknowledge.

As far as ethics and morals are concerned, that did trouble me initially and I dwelled on it far longer than what I should have. What creates that mindset is the impression one gets fom scholars of religion, that it has a monopoly on morals and that it provides an objective framework. The truth of it is that morals and ethics are subjective and situational. Am I the same person ethically and morally as what I was when I was muslim? Except for a few minor adjustments yes I am. It's just that now I have let go of religion and superstition.
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #17 - December 28, 2009, 10:56 PM

Quote from: Kafirist on December 27, 2009, 01:53 AM
Well I went through a bit of a depressed 'lost' period too. For about almost a year actually. It was quite a difference for me because I did not leave my Islamic lifestyle gradually so for like 6-7 years I had been a fairly strict practicing muslim and then in literally one day I stopped everything. At first it was liberating but later I began feeling 'lost'. This was made worse by the fact that in my last year on uni I started drinking heavily and also lost all my friends because of my increasingly vocal heresy and apostacy.

So yeah, maybe you're a newly 'free' and just kind of trying to find a new mindset? What you should realize that nothing in life is changed, so I've always been a driven person and I quickly went back to my goal-oriented mindset that I had even as a muslim and simply added some new goals and took out some older practices. One of the first things I did was to actually ask a girl out and lose my virginity. That goal alone should keep you fairly busy.

I won't lie t you I could have actually lost my virginity when I was 16 but due to a combination of my beliefs and not really being attracted to the girl I did not go through with it. On a side note now I have left Islam, losing my virginity does in fact seem more appealling to me than ever.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #18 - December 28, 2009, 11:01 PM

Quote from: Omaar Khayaam on December 27, 2009, 07:03 AM
I really don't think there is a defining moment where one says to themselves that "right I am now an apostate". It's fairly gradual and you come to a point where the apologetics you might have been given by muslims or even thought up yourself, to deal with the doubts just don't cut it anymore and you see right through them. You might just ask yourself at some point "do I really believe all this?" and you will finally just admit to yourself that "no I don't". The doubts might have been languising for ages but your admittance might have taken longer for you to acknowledge.

As far as ethics and morals are concerned, that did trouble me initially and I dwelled on it far longer than what I should have. What creates that mindset is the impression one gets fom scholars of religion, that it has a monopoly on morals and that it provides an objective framework. The truth of it is that morals and ethics are subjective and situational. Am I the same person ethically and morally as what I was when I was muslim? Except for a few minor adjustments yes I am. It's just that now I have let go of religion and superstition.

Interesting. I feel the same way. Leaving Islam has not significantly changed me but at the same time I know longer feel intimidated by a highe rbeing to pray and so on. Your take on moraity seems to make sense, but I would hope that for most of us as intelligent reasonable human beings rape, murder, racism, homophobia are immoral.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #19 - December 28, 2009, 11:03 PM

Quote from: Heyjustlooking on December 27, 2009, 12:28 AM
What I mean by this topic is that ever since I have left Islam, I sometimes get this feeling of emptiness. I understand that we do not need religion to give us a purpose in life, we can make up our own purpose of why we are here. I was wondering if u guys ever felt lost since leaving your religion or ever felt lost on the issue concerning what is the basis of your morality. I guess I get a feeling of goodness inside of me when I help someone out and it in a way makes me happier but isn't this essentially then an arrogant motive for doing good. Maybe in a sense?

Just a random thought I had. Please feel free to comment and share your thoughts.

No. I did not feel empty.

I felt liberated.

May be because I lost my faith very gradually over many years and it was never a an agonising break with the past.

May be the advice would be - let go of your faith gradually....?

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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #20 - December 28, 2009, 11:10 PM

Quote from: Rubaiyat on December 28, 2009, 11:03 PM
No. I did not feel empty.

I felt liberated.

May be because I lost my faith very gradually over many years and it was never a an agonising break with the past.

May be the advice would be - let go of your faith gradually....?

Ye mine was a gradual one but no as gradual as many people. I always had doubts, then these doubts grew stronger and stronger, then I decided to become more open-minded and in the end I decided I had to let go. This process took a couple of years maybe more actually because technically I always had doubts since I was like 14 so it would be more like 5 years then.

Five steps - Denial, bargaining, anger, depression and acceptance. I'm now at the last stage.

"The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
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Re: Purpose of life...sense of being lost and all that shit
Reply #21 - December 28, 2009, 11:30 PM

Quote from: Heyjustlooking on December 27, 2009, 12:28 AM
What I mean by this topic is that ever since I have left Islam, I sometimes get this feeling of emptiness. I understand that we do not need religion to give us a purpose in life, we can make up our own purpose of why we are here. I was wondering if u guys ever felt lost since leaving your religion or ever felt lost on the issue concerning what is the basis of your morality. I guess I get a feeling of goodness inside of me when I help someone out and it in a way makes me happier but isn't this essentially then an arrogant motive for doing good. Maybe in a sense?

Just a random thought I had. Please feel free to comment and share your thoughts.

Once I was sure that I didn't believe in any of it and would never go back to Islam, I actually felt much better and never got that 'empty feeling'. I wasn't worried about a purpose either. I appreciate my life and other people a lot more now I've left Islam knowing that this could be all we get.
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