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Theme Changer

 Topic: Western Reverts

 (Read 6428 times)
  • 12 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Western Reverts
     OP - June 26, 2010, 02:32 PM

    I would be interested to know how your family/friends reacted when you
    became a muslim.

    I lost quite a few friends who had no tolerance for Islam when i converted,
    and also experienced prejudice from the general public while wearing a hijab
    here in the states.

    My family for the most part just shrugged (as i have been seeking a spiritual
    path in all sorts of arenas for years) But Id like to know how they responded
    and reacted to your conversion.

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: Western Reverts
     Reply #1 - June 27, 2010, 01:03 AM

    Most of my friends and family were fine with it. My mom figured it was a phase, and told me she thought I was just experimenting because I was in university. That kinda pissed me off, because I was really serious about it, but even so, she and the rest of my family were very supportive of me as a Muslim. They would go out of their way to serve halal food for me at family gatherings, and my mom even sewed me a couple of hijabs. The rest of my immediate family were not very religious, so they didn't give a shit. My grandmother, however, is a very devout Mormon, and although she would try to be polite she sometimes just couldn't stop herself from telling me that I need to return to Jesus. Those conversations were usually short and civil, but still stressful because again, I was really serious about being a Muslim.

    Of my friends, only one made any protest to my conversion. I converted before 9/11 though, so hardly anyone even knew what Islam was. The one friend who protested though,  had a cousin, aunt and uncle who were Muslims (at least she said it was her cousin, but I'm not sure how far removed because they were the only ones in her entire family) so she was somewhat familiar with the misogynistic nature of Islam, and she warned me about it. I remember one conversation we had about salat, and how women were not allowed to pray on their periods. She of course thought it was discriminatory, but I told her the reasoning made sense, and that it was actually a freedom afforded to women. She told me she hoped I wouldn't have to deal with any worse kinds of "freedoms." When she said that, I knew she was under all the same "misconceptions that Westerners held about Islam," since of course I had already learned all about that. I was sad that she would refuse to understand, so I just ignored her. We stopped hanging out shortly after that. A couple of years later we happened to run into each other on the street. I had just parked my car and was getting out when she drove by and saw me, and stopped in the street to say hi. I was wearing the full hijab + abaya, and I sort of felt glad that she saw me like that because it proved that Islam hadn't been just a phase. We chatted for a minute or so when a car turned onto the street behind her, so she drove forward as though to let them pass, but then she just kept driving and never came back. That's the last I saw of her. I've thought about her a few times since I left Islam, but I don't know how to find her. I don't remember her last name, and I don't have any emails from her or any other sort of record of contact. I wish I could see her again, to see if we might be friends again.

    Anyway, other than her, none of my other friends really cared, although honestly by the time I converted, I had stopped hanging out with my friends very much and was more interested in hanging out with my new Muslim friends. Once I started wearing hijab, I did have a few uncomfortable moments when people would tell me to go back to my country, but it wasn't like a mob coming after me, just one idiot. It happened once at the place where I worked, although the person didn't say it to my face. He commented on me to my coworkers, saying I should go back to my country and stop stealing our jobs here. My coworkers defended me and told him I'm an American and etc, and then told me about it later.

    Oh, I should mention about my grandmother -- now that I'm not a Muslim anymore, instead of telling me to return to Jesus, now she just keeps trying to get me to go to church. Lol, gotta love her. dance

    The only thing we have to fear is fear itself
    - 32nd United States President Franklin D. Roosevelt
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #2 - December 20, 2015, 02:18 PM

    Bump.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #3 - December 20, 2015, 06:24 PM

    I wonder about "Western" converts who leave Islam, because they've realised what it really is. Apparently the writer G Willow Wilson ( a convert) made reference to an "apostasy industry". I don't know the exact context of her comment, but it did annoy me as it sounds on a par with "native informants" and my Muslim friend's comments about ex-Muslims.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #4 - December 20, 2015, 06:50 PM

    I almost consider myself a Western convert. I was born in America, and really had no culture. My family just happened to be "Muslim" by name. It was a cultural thing.

    I discovered Islam myself, and undertook the western convert journey in figuring stuff out.

    I think it's even easier for an American convert to recognize Islam as a scam than it is for someone born into it, didn't practice at first, but then discovered it on their own..

    Because growing up with no religion, you have a sense of what's logical and what's not logical as opposed to the "Muslim-born" person..

    It's a devastating feeling if you let it control your life.

    I equate it to Toy Story.. When BuzzLightyear figured out he was an actual toy, and not a space ranger..


    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #5 - December 20, 2015, 09:28 PM

    The converts who go from Christian to Muslim though... oi vey. They can be a special kind of nuts.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #6 - December 20, 2015, 09:42 PM

    I almost consider myself a Western convert. I was born in America, and really had no culture. My family just happened to be "Muslim" by name. It was a cultural thing.

    I discovered Islam myself, and undertook the western convert journey in figuring stuff out.

    I think it's even easier for an American convert to recognize Islam as a scam than it is for someone born into it, didn't practice at first, but then discovered it on their own..

    Because growing up with no religion, you have a sense of what's logical and what's not logical as opposed to the "Muslim-born" person..

    It's a devastating feeling if you let it control your life.

    I equate it to Toy Story.. When BuzzLightyear figured out he was an actual toy, and not a space ranger..




    I've read some converts say "I found Islam when I was all alone in the dark" and go on a rant if anyone dares question their niqab and abaya, or beard for that matter.

    They seem to think that having a "foreign" religion makes them unique and righteous, as well as less racist if that makes sense?


    Though I totally agree about "born" Muslims and the Buzz Lightyear analogy... that's how I felt inside, when I realised the qur'an was wrong. I let Islam control my life for so long, and for what?? I even went pescetarian to try and get around the constant obsession with halal meat which I saw around me!
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #7 - December 20, 2015, 10:59 PM

    Hey! Same here~

    I went Vegan, and I did Brazlilian Jiu Jitsu for a year to get out my aggression of being Muslim for all of these years.. I felt I had to make up for lost time.

    Then I hit a sad point, where I realized that I couldn't avoid the pain.. I had to deal with it inside..

    And yes, white converts I know did convert to Islam because they thought it made them less racist and unique and special. Bingo!

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #8 - December 21, 2015, 01:19 AM

    So is that something they've told you, or did ya'll interpret that yourselves?

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #9 - December 21, 2015, 01:47 AM

    Y´all are way off.

    And I love it when Cornflower talks American. I swear she does it better than I.

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #10 - December 21, 2015, 01:55 AM

    Well,  I'm doing my best Grin

    And yes, they are way off.

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #11 - December 21, 2015, 02:06 AM

    "white converts I know" was the key part..

    Of course they didn't tell me.. It would be dumb of them to "tell me" that's why they converted.

    I don't need that to make inferences. Just like I don't need Gangsters to tell me they worship their gang colors/territory but know they do..

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #12 - December 21, 2015, 02:10 AM

    OK, thanks for explaining to us what converts really go through and how they think. The more you know...

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #13 - December 21, 2015, 02:15 AM

    "White converts I know.."

    Didn't say "all white converts in the world."


    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #14 - December 21, 2015, 02:35 AM

    Daughter of (non-White) converts here *waves*

    I think that for some converts, irrespective of race the aspect of brotherhood and sisterhood is something that makes Islam very appealing. It gives some (not all) people a real sense of belonging, especially if you're in a community that has a lot of converts and not one of those that tends to be cliquey.

    All of my extended family seem to accept my parents' choices.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #15 - December 21, 2015, 02:39 AM

    "for some converts, irrespective of race the aspect of brotherhood and sisterhood is something that makes Islam very appealing"

    The concept of brotherhood and sisterhood attracts many.

    "especially if you're in a community that has a lot of converts and not one of those that tends to be cliquey."

    I've been with convert cliques and non-convert cliques.. And a mixture of both.. All of them tend to be a little cliquey from my experience.

    But just sharing my thoughts. Hopefully the wrath of Thor doesn't come down for just sharing my thoughts. lol

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #16 - December 21, 2015, 02:47 AM

    @AGirlWithDoubts, Exactly.

    I think what brings Western converts to Islam is a lot of what brings anyone to anything. They're missing something that they think the religion will provide. A sense of structure, a sense of spiritual comfort, a purpose in life, a community. Reasons for converting range from as petty as wanting the attention of wearing a hijab to as deep as feeling in your bones that the words of the Quran are the truth. Some convert because they imagine themselves joining the underdogs and there's a large social justice aspect to becoming part of the ummah, and some convert because they learned the nice versions of sharia from someone and they thought it sounded like a sweet deal.

    Yes, some convert out of wanting to have some special or "exotic" qualities to them and that's awfully hard for a lot of white people in New England to acquire elsewhere, and some people convert, I don't know, as a youthful and poorly-thought-out way of rebelling against your Christian upbringing, just as a wild, non-specific example from nobody in particular.

    I knew a few girls who converted for a boyfriend or a husband. Those were the saddest stories, usually.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #17 - December 21, 2015, 02:51 AM

    The converts who go from Christian to Muslim though... oi vey. They can be a special kind of nuts.

    Arf.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #18 - December 21, 2015, 03:13 AM

    But just sharing my thoughts. Hopefully the wrath of Thor doesn't come down for just sharing my thoughts. lol


    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #19 - December 21, 2015, 03:30 AM

    In the name of Loki, Most Merciful, Most Beneficent

    I call upon you to take care of Thor.

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #20 - December 21, 2015, 03:35 AM

    You know in the actual myths Thor is a redhead? Stan Lee is a gingerphobe.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #21 - December 21, 2015, 03:50 AM

    Well,  I'm doing my best Grin

    And yes, they are way off.


    Your swearing is always perfect. I really admire your swearing, honest. I am still working on mine.

    Your links are in your PM. Let me know if they do not work!

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #22 - December 21, 2015, 03:52 AM

    You know in the actual myths Thor is a redhead? Stan Lee is a gingerphobe.


    I think in every tradition redheads have held more power than other folks, actually.

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #23 - December 21, 2015, 03:53 AM

    You know in the actual myths Thor is a redhead? Stan Lee is a gingerphobe.


    Thor would have been more badass with red hair.. Long blonde hair on a god doesn't make sense to me.

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #24 - December 21, 2015, 04:10 AM












    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #25 - December 21, 2015, 04:12 AM

    I think in every tradition redheads have held more power than other folks, actually.

    Well, gingers are the superior race.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #26 - December 21, 2015, 06:56 AM

    I think it's even easier for an American convert to recognize Islam as a scam than it is for someone born into it, didn't practice at first, but then discovered it on their own..

    Because growing up with no religion, you have a sense of what's logical and what's not logical as opposed to the "Muslim-born" person..


    Perhaps I'm not without a subtle tinge of xenophobia when it comes to Western converts as opposed to those that were born Muslim for this very reason. I immediately assume that there's something wrong in their lives; also, that they're severely lacking any kind of logical and critical faculties to convert to such a religion. It's probably unfair though, because I don't generally hold those born Muslim in the same light, and anecdotal experience tells me there are plenty of intelligent, self-aware individuals who have been completely swayed by emotional based motivations and attachments (no doubt there's a few on this forum).
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #27 - December 21, 2015, 07:06 AM

    It's all emotional at the end of the day. It's the Peripheral Route to Persuasion in my opinion

    Back when I was Muslim, I even had a white convert friend who claimed he was once an atheist before Islam.. He claimed he had in depth knowledge of evolution. I begged him for his argument to convince him that Islam was true, and he just gave me the "blind watch-maker" argument.. Which is a weak argument.

    When I look back and analyze his life (we'd talk for hours about each other's lives and experience), I can see he had a lot of hardship in his life, and Islam took him by chance due to emotional attachment.

    He had been exposed to Ramadan, the Arabs, and the Indo-pak community at a very vulnerable stage in his life.. And it worked. He converted to Islam.. Started to seriously study it, and then bam.. He became a Muslim just like that.

    He was very intelligent.. But emotions got the better of him.

    "If you don't like your religion's fundamentalists, then maybe there's something wrong with your religion's fundamentals."
    "Demanding blind respect but not offering any respect in reciprocation is laughable."
    "Let all the people in all the worlds be in peace."
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #28 - December 21, 2015, 07:16 AM

    Your swearing is always perfect. I really admire your swearing, honest. I am still working on mine.



    I've been swearing since I can remember, of course I got that shit down. But I'm still a lady, I know when it should be said out loud, and when it should be muttered under my breath.

    But I can't deny it, I'd much rather have my grammar and vocab together. But it's still useful knowing the in's and out's of the much versatile word "fuck". I use it frequently, I might add.

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Western Reverts
     Reply #29 - December 21, 2015, 07:45 AM

    He had been exposed to Ramadan, the Arabs, and the Indo-pak community at a very vulnerable stage in his life.. And it worked. He converted to Islam.. Started to seriously study it, and then bam.. He became a Muslim just like that.

    He was very intelligent.. But emotions got the better of him.


    I remember driving past a mosque in South West Sydney one night as the followers, most wearing the traditional white robes, were leaving. I was impressed with how ornate it all was, and was overcome with  desire for that sense of structure, observance and community which accompanies it all. Fortunately all those ingredients aren't exclusive to organised religion, though it perhaps takes a more nuanced mind to think outside the box and find them.
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