What will happen the first time I get drunk?

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #30 - August 29, 2011, 12:39 AM

Quote from: shilakijawani on August 29, 2011, 12:34 AM
So I won't hook up with 2-3 girls on the same night?

That's what another ex muslim said happened to him, and he weighs 250 lbs.

You live in Pakistan. Be realistic.

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #31 - August 29, 2011, 12:39 AM

Quote from: osmanthus on August 29, 2011, 12:35 AM
Look shilakijawani , I'm trying to do you a favour here. You're such a desperate little try-hard tosser that you'll only make a complete idiot of yourself and get into trouble if you hit the booze. Remember the old saying: reality is for those who can't handle getting wasted.

Right, and you've been my babysitter since I was 10 and hence you know everything about me, right?

Quote from: BerberElla on August 29, 2011, 12:36 AM
and what a drunk man says happened to him, MUST have happened to him as he believes it?

Well, do you know that guy cenk ugur who hosts the young turks show?

He's an ex muslim and he described on his show what happened to him the first time he got drunk, and he said he hooked up with 2 girls on the same night.

Quote from: King Tut on December 09, 2012, 06:28 PM
Yeah an I am super ugly, I can't even beat my chest am too skinny and when I roaaar to attract women, they laugh at me, because it sounds like a girl screaming. I can't even attract any bitches!
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #32 - August 29, 2011, 12:40 AM

Quote from: GodIsNotGreat on August 29, 2011, 12:39 AM
You live in Pakistan. Be realistic.

Well I won't get drunk in Pakistan obviously. Was talking about in future.

Quote from: King Tut on December 09, 2012, 06:28 PM
Yeah an I am super ugly, I can't even beat my chest am too skinny and when I roaaar to attract women, they laugh at me, because it sounds like a girl screaming. I can't even attract any bitches!
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #33 - August 29, 2011, 12:42 AM

Quote from: Prince Spinoza on August 29, 2011, 12:36 AM
I keep trying to get drunk, and fail.

Quote from: BerberElla on August 29, 2011, 12:38 AM
Stop drinking WKD then, that shit only works for Zaiba.

Quote from: Zaiba on August 29, 2011, 12:39 AM

OMDAIZ stop picking on me!!! LOOOL.

I miss my WKD

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #34 - August 29, 2011, 12:42 AM

Quote from: shilakijawani on August 29, 2011, 12:39 AM
He's an ex muslim and he described on his show what happened to him the first time he got drunk, and he said he hooked up with 2 girls on the same night.

dude u gotta be able to spot bullshit. most guys who claim such things are full of it.

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #35 - August 29, 2011, 12:44 AM

Quote from: Fombles on August 29, 2011, 12:42 AM

(Clicky for piccy!)

I should've known my WKD infamousness was going to rise again, it had been so long ..

Damn you JACK BLACK, DAMN YOU!
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #36 - August 29, 2011, 12:45 AM

Quote from: Zaiba on August 29, 2011, 12:44 AM
Damn you JACK BLACK, DAMN YOU!

News flash, I don't look like him.

And even if I did before, my hair is longer now, so hah!

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07:54 <harakaat>: considering how annoying you are
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #37 - August 29, 2011, 12:46 AM

JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK JACK BLACK
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #38 - August 29, 2011, 12:48 AM

STILL DOESN'T APPLY TO ME

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #39 - August 29, 2011, 01:20 AM

Ok, true story for ya. No, it didn't happen to me. If it did I'd own up to it, coz it was thirty years ago anyway and it is funny as hell. This is one a mate of mine told me about.

He'd been on the turps with a bunch of his mates, and one of them got to the stage of falling over and passing out. So the lads had a brilliant idea. They picked him up and carried him down to the local park, then they pulled his duds down around his ankles, kicked him in the arse, put ten bucks in his hand, and left him there.

Next morning, said dude wakes up with a sore head, a sore butt, ten bucks and duds around ankles. He was a very worried boy for a few days, and almost murdered them when they owned up to it.

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #40 - August 29, 2011, 01:21 AM

OMG that us priceless.

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #41 - August 29, 2011, 01:51 AM

Everyone reacts to alcohol differently. People say you behave different but that's never been my experience. No matter how much I drink I never lose my senses so much that I do things that are not in my nature- I'm quite conservative and been drunk often and never once flashed, stripped, danced on tables or woke up next to a stranger. In fact, I hate sex when I'm drunk!

I love to dance but I often feel stupid to, drinking just gives me a little confidance to dance- I still know I look stupid, I just don't care! It's great. That's the only time I like to drink really (when out clubbing). Very rarely I have a G&T at home to relax when I'm super wound up.

When you drink for the first time BEWARE- Everyone falls into the same trap. You have one and expect to be drunk but nothing happens, so you have another, still nothing. So you think, wtf this is lame- then you proceed to down 3, 4, 5. You feel fine but then half hour to 1 hour later it all hits you at once, the room spins and you feel awful and sick and your whole night is ruined (if you're lucky a friend will take you home before you embarrass yourself by puking everywhere and passing out in public). When drinking for the first time TAKE IT EASY! Have on drink, then chill for at least half hour. Drink plenty of water. Let it take effect, don't rush.

There are many drinks to try, some people drink WKD but it's not going to do much. I don't generally like the taste of alcohol so for me the only appeal in drinking is to get drunk or at least tipsy- for this reason I prefer 'proper drinks'. When I was younger (19) I started rough with Vodka and JD- I wouldn't recommend either as they tend to make you aggressive and depressed. I generally enjoy Gin because it's quite smooth, not throat killing like other drinks, Southern Comfort with lemonade's nice too but not with the tap lemonade in bars, I like it only with proper nice lemonade like Schweppes. I also love shots like sambuka but don't overdo these, they're strong! I used to love Tequila til I found out about the maggots- now I just can't drink it *eugh*

Above all be sure to have GOOD friends with you. I was lucky that my friends and I all took care of each other, watched each others backs, made sure no guys fucked with us, and took any over drunk friend home before they embarrassed themselves- I've NEVER seen guys do this- a few times my friends and I would find a guy mate (back in the uni days) abandoned by his mates or made to look a fool when too drunk- we often had to take said guy home ourselves- guys are jerks!
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #42 - August 29, 2011, 01:54 AM

If you're lucky your ass will remain untouched (presuming no one's been there yet, anyway).

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #43 - August 29, 2011, 02:52 AM

Quote from: BerberElla on August 29, 2011, 12:34 AM
I prefer being tipsy, being drunk just has me begging whatever god, luck, force of nature is out there, to stop the room spinning.

This^

You will not like the smell or taste. Not on your first time or 500th time. Have you ever sniffed an alcohol swab and/or licked it? That's what hard liquor smells and basically tastes like.

You're skin feels numb, muscles relaxed, you either feel like dancing to the music, very talkative or laid back. You'll be less anxious and more confident. But that will backfire if you're unable to hide your darkest secrets and feelings. You start blaming the Jews for all the problems in the world and telling your girlfriend that it's her fault if she gets raped by a pack of niggers.

Drink too much and you'll have an upset stomach, get dizzy, and you'll just puke your brains out. You'll get sick just at the site or smell of alcohol the next day.

And don't drink when your feeling down. You will cry like a baby.

Choose only one of the following:
- 3 beers
- (1/4 glass vodka, 3/4 glass juice or soda) x 2
- (1/4 glass whiskey, 3/4 glass of pepsi/coke) x 2

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #44 - August 29, 2011, 03:04 AM

Quote from: Saffire on August 29, 2011, 01:51 AM
Everyone reacts to alcohol differently. People say you behave different but that's never been my experience. No matter how much I drink I never lose my senses so much that I do things that are not in my nature- I'm quite conservative and been drunk often and never once flashed, stripped, danced on tables or woke up next to a stranger. In fact, I hate sex when I'm drunk!

I love to dance but I often feel stupid to, drinking just gives me a little confidance to dance- I still know I look stupid, I just don't care! It's great. That's the only time I like to drink really (when out clubbing). Very rarely I have a G&T at home to relax when I'm super wound up.

When you drink for the first time BEWARE- Everyone falls into the same trap. You have one and expect to be drunk but nothing happens, so you have another, still nothing. So you think, wtf this is lame- then you proceed to down 3, 4, 5. You feel fine but then half hour to 1 hour later it all hits you at once, the room spins and you feel awful and sick and your whole night is ruined (if you're lucky a friend will take you home before you embarrass yourself by puking everywhere and passing out in public). When drinking for the first time TAKE IT EASY! Have on drink, then chill for at least half hour. Drink plenty of water. Let it take effect, don't rush.

There are many drinks to try, some people drink WKD but it's not going to do much. I don't generally like the taste of alcohol so for me the only appeal in drinking is to get drunk or at least tipsy- for this reason I prefer 'proper drinks'. When I was younger (19) I started rough with Vodka and JD- I wouldn't recommend either as they tend to make you aggressive and depressed. I generally enjoy Gin because it's quite smooth, not throat killing like other drinks, Southern Comfort with lemonade's nice too but not with the tap lemonade in bars, I like it only with proper nice lemonade like Schweppes. I also love shots like sambuka but don't overdo these, they're strong! I used to love Tequila til I found out about the maggots- now I just can't drink it *eugh*

Above all be sure to have GOOD friends with you. I was lucky that my friends and I all took care of each other, watched each others backs, made sure no guys fucked with us, and took any over drunk friend home before they embarrassed themselves- I've NEVER seen guys do this- a few times my friends and I would find a guy mate (back in the uni days) abandoned by his mates or made to look a fool when too drunk- we often had to take said guy home ourselves- guys are jerks!

Bahiraomar, is that you?
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #45 - August 29, 2011, 03:15 AM

No, I'm not 'Bahiraomar'
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #46 - August 29, 2011, 03:49 AM

First time I got really drunk (15) I went for a walk (to see the sea, for whatever reason), kept falling but passed out only once in the middle of a street. Good thing it wasn't too busy.
I was never able to get quite that drunk in the next 15 or so years (had one sober year due to conversion, which may or may not be related to loss of brain cells thanks to vodka).

"That it is indeed the speech of an illustrious messenger" (The Koran 69:40)
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #47 - August 29, 2011, 04:22 AM

You end up dressed like

<<<<< this, trapped in someone's basement.
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #48 - August 29, 2011, 05:32 AM

Quote from: osmanthus on August 29, 2011, 01:20 AM
Ok, true story for ya. No, it didn't happen to me. If it did I'd own up to it, coz it was thirty years ago anyway and it is funny as hell. This is one a mate of mine told me about.

He'd been on the turps with a bunch of his mates, and one of them got to the stage of falling over and passing out. So the lads had a brilliant idea. They picked him up and carried him down to the local park, then they pulled his duds down around his ankles, kicked him in the arse, put ten bucks in his hand, and left him there.

Next morning, said dude wakes up with a sore head, a sore butt, ten bucks and duds around ankles. He was a very worried boy for a few days, and almost murdered them when they owned up to it.

Were your friends gay? I've never felt the urge to pull this kind of joke on any of my guy friends.

Quote from: King Tut on December 09, 2012, 06:28 PM
Yeah an I am super ugly, I can't even beat my chest am too skinny and when I roaaar to attract women, they laugh at me, because it sounds like a girl screaming. I can't even attract any bitches!
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #49 - August 29, 2011, 06:29 AM

You lack imagination.

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #50 - August 29, 2011, 06:39 AM

How old are you shilakijawani - 12?
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #51 - August 29, 2011, 07:34 AM

Quote from: shilakijawani on August 29, 2011, 12:03 AM
2-3 years since I've been an ex muslim and I still haven't had alcohol. I want to know what will happen the first time I get drunk. I.e how it would feel, how I would behave, etc. Kthxbi.

Limit yourself to 2 drinks and you should enjoy it without fear of hangover.
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #52 - August 29, 2011, 07:39 AM

You will become god like and

Little Fly, Thy summer's play
My thoughtless hand has brushed away.

I too dance and drink, and sing,
Till some blind hand shall brush my wing.

Therefore I am a happy fly,
If I live or if I die.
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #53 - August 29, 2011, 07:49 AM

You will become convinced that you are god-like, and proceed to dance like a spastic chicken.

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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #54 - August 29, 2011, 03:11 PM

You will think your jokes are funny but none else will.

Also obligatory quote for first time drinker

" No one drink the beer! The beer as gone bad!"

" Tastes alright to me "

So once again I'm left with the classic Irish man's dilemma, do I eat the potato or do I let it ferment so I can drink it later?
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Re: What will happen the first time I get drunk?
Reply #55 - August 29, 2011, 03:26 PM

Quote from: shilakijawani on August 29, 2011, 12:03 AM
2-3 years since I've been an ex muslim and I still haven't had alcohol. I want to know what will happen the first time I get drunk. I.e how it would feel, how I would behave, etc. Kthxbi.

Two words:

ASS RAPE

fuck you
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