Ex Muslim, Shia

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Ex Muslim, Shia
OP - November 05, 2012, 03:44 PM

Hey guys, I've just had a little look around, and I found some interesting stuff.

I'm not from the UK, I'm from Australia, but I can't find an ex-Muslims Australian forum I joined an Aussie atheist forum, but could not connect with people who linked to Pat Condell, Q society, etc. (people really think Muslims are trying to take over the world. I thought it was them evul j0000z )

Are there any active ex Shias? I found threads but they have been inactive for a while.

I grew up a devout Muslim, went to a Sunni school (even though my family is Shia) and believed in Sunni Islam. The irony is that my Sunni friends still saw me as Shia, and weren't discreet about disliking that. So in short, I was always the outsider.
Some friends have openly called my Shia background kufr/shirk/bida and yet, I know that if I was open about being a real kafir now, they'd have a fit
My friends are nearly all Muslim, and my family is still very devout. It sucks because I have to pretend to fit in, and don't have anyone to connect with.

Please drop a comment here, especially if you relate, or are from Australia

I'm not sure what else to say. I dislike all religions. That is all
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Re: Ex Muslim, Shia
Reply #1 - November 05, 2012, 03:50 PM

When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.

A.A. Milne,

"We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
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Re: Ex Muslim, Shia
Reply #2 - November 05, 2012, 03:55 PM

Hi Jila, we have Aussie members here, welcome

"we can smell traitors and country haters"

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Reply #3 - November 05, 2012, 04:03 PM

Cheers billy!

Hi moi
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Reply #4 - November 05, 2012, 04:04 PM

Hello and welcome. For a start try and make more non Muslim friends where you live. It will help you not feel as isolated and claustrophobic.

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Reply #5 - November 05, 2012, 04:24 PM

Ty Pepe. Aint that the truth! I really like my non Muslim uni friends.
My plan right now is to get to study my final uni year away from home. That would be amazing <3
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Reply #6 - November 05, 2012, 04:45 PM

Welcome, enjoy your time here, there are plenty of ex-muslims from all backgrounds and walks of life and who have an understanding of all sorts of areas so you won't have trouble finding diversity here. Anyway, I hope you get to study your final year away from home, stay safe and stay happy.

Welcome again.

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Re: Ex Muslim, Shia
Reply #7 - November 06, 2012, 01:34 AM

Quote from: Jila on November 05, 2012, 03:44 PM
Hey guys, I've just had a little look around, and I found some interesting stuff.

I'm not from the UK, I'm from Australia, but I can't find an ex-Muslims Australian forum I joined an Aussie atheist forum, but could not connect with people who linked to Pat Condell, Q society, etc. (people really think Muslims are trying to take over the world. I thought it was them evul j0000z )

Are there any active ex Shias? I found threads but they have been inactive for a while.

There are several ex-Shia here, but they're all mad, bad and dangerous to know. Watch out for Allat. She's the worst.

Quote
Please drop a comment here, especially if you relate, or are from Australia

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Reply #8 - November 06, 2012, 01:54 AM

Don't listen to Chewbacca ^^ He's escaped the reserve and we're trying to track him down as we speak.

Welcome Yeah there are lots of ex-shias around. Mostly, I can speak for myself and probably most of the others, it stopped mattering the sectarianism in Islam, once we realized the whole thing is false and man-made. But there are certain experiences that are probably common to all who were raised shia. So, you say your family is very religious? What do they do; I mean, hijab, and everything, or just going to mosque and festivals and such? Also, how do you have to act to fit in? Do you have outlets where you could hang out with non-muslims i.e. work, school, etc..?

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Reply #9 - November 06, 2012, 02:39 AM

Hi Jila, welcome to the forum and have a rabbit!

Being a shiamuslim is a bit of a joke around these parts, so don't mind that. Anyway, hope you enjoy the forum and get involved in the discussions.

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harakaat, friend, RIP
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Reply #10 - November 06, 2012, 03:14 AM

Welcome Jila!!!

Nothing can be more contrary to religion and the clergy than reason and common sense. - Voltaire
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Reply #11 - November 06, 2012, 09:51 AM

Thanks Sprout!

gday osmanthus!

Thanks allat. Aww I thought we could fight about which one of the 73 sects will go to heaven My parents take hijab very seriously. It seems more of a shia/Arab thing (or I could be wrong). I'm so envious of my Asian friends, who wear and take off their scarves as they please, and don't have to hide.

I'm also watching my little sis get forced to wear hijab and she's acting very anti social because of it. That adds more pressure on me. I pretty much act very Islamic around my family. I wouldn't even say hi to a guy friend when I'm out with my family I see my non Muslim friends at uni and that's all.

Btw, I got arrested in a gulf country for being shia. Strip searched and everything. The police said I committed witchcraft because I had a shia duaa wrapped in cloth in my purse I got out after a few hours, but that shit further damaged my faith

Hi asbie, thanks!

Thanks canex
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Reply #12 - November 06, 2012, 09:57 AM

Ex-Shia, REPRESENT!

er..hai!

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Re: Ex Muslim, Shia
Reply #13 - November 06, 2012, 11:22 AM

Quote
I'm also watching my little sis get forced to wear hijab and she's acting very anti social because of it. That adds more pressure on me. I pretty much act very Islamic around my family. I wouldn't even say hi to a guy friend

What is going on in parents' heads that they are continually enforcing weird rules?

Is this film really a sign of the end of the world?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aataTbxlWeM

When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.

A.A. Milne,

"We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
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Reply #14 - December 11, 2012, 07:16 AM

*spams own thread*

I had a talk with my parents just now, about apostasy. It was opened because of the documentary we watched about the Westboro Baptist Church. I found myself saying things like "they're just like Muslims!" to which my dad replies "We're nothing like them" la la..

I asked my dad what he would do if I became Jewish. He said he would throw me out.

I always use that example. Jewish. It seems the safest thing to say, considering Jews are like cousins to us. When he said it, I wanted him to say it again. So again, I ask, "you're saying if I chose to become Jewish tomorrow, you would throw me out?". This time his answers is a bit more detailed, "Yes; my relationship with God comes first, and if you are a murtad (a word I haven't heard in my family before) then you can't be with us".

For some weird reason, I burst out laughing. Even my dad started laughing with me. Then I say, "really?", and he says "yep" and I continue laughing.

doop di doooo..I feel like it's settled then, like I know if I openly took that path, bye bye family. Not even, I mean I asked about an Abrahamic faith ffs..At least he ended up saying yeah, they would throw me out, unlike in the beginning, where he acted all sanctimonious compared to the WBC people. *sighs and has a moment*...rantrantrant...
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Reply #15 - December 11, 2012, 11:05 AM

Hey look on the bright side, at least he didn't say he would kill you - that counts as moderate I reckon

"we can smell traitors and country haters"

Quote from: arX on May 01, 2011, 03:33 AM
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Reply #16 - December 11, 2012, 11:33 AM

You never know how people are going to react until it happens. I had one friend whose parents told him they'd disown him if he were gay, he came out, and they got used to it eventually. On the other hand, one person whose parents didn't mind the thought that they were secular thought that the parents would accept him being an ex-catholic, they cut ties with him when he came out.

So you can never quite know until it happens. I generally say, if the parents are smart/logical enough and have a strong enough relationship with the child, they'll usually choose their child over dogma/prejudice/bias etc, at least in the long run after the drama. This applies to Muslims as well.

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Reply #17 - December 11, 2012, 11:58 AM

Hey Jila I’m from Australia *waves flag* but you already knew that

That’s really sad about your dad, I'm sure it must've hurt

Have you considered that it’s the Jewish thing that turned him off? My parents (and most Muslims) hate Jews something awful; in fact, I’d argue that Muslims have a special kind of hatred reserved for Jews, so perhaps if you said Christian or something else the blow would’ve been softer? I remember reading somewhere some ex-Muslims saying how converting to another religion would be tantamount to treason or betrayal to their families, whereas irreligiosity would just be seen as a “phase” or ignorance. I thought that was interesting. Do you think that could be the case with your dad?
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Reply #18 - December 11, 2012, 12:03 PM

I'd recommend moving out Jila; that way you can live your life whilst maintaining a good relationship with your parents and everyone wins Honesty isn't always the best policy.
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Reply #19 - December 11, 2012, 12:27 PM

Quote from: Al-Alethia on December 11, 2012, 12:03 PM
Honesty isn't always the best policy.

That's how "WHITE LIES" came into existence !

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Reply #20 - December 12, 2012, 01:33 PM

Billy, yeah they're not violent. Just stupid and hurtful.

Al-Alethia (what does that mean btw?), I dunno about my dad and irreligiosity. I felt safe with Judaism because my circle is Jew-neutral, pro Israel (and a very strong dislike of Xtianity), but the vibe I got was like what you said there:
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treason or betrayal to their families

. The way he said murtad, it wasn't even like my dad talking. My brother was a drug dealer and a thief for like 2 years, and he's still allowed at our house. He hid a gun in this house and he was still allowed back. I feel like me being a girl makes them less tolerant because of their cultural shit, and they will find what they can in Islam to support their views.

It's like seeing converts feel sad about their non-Muslim parents; that mentality. Why can't you make duaa for a non Muslim? You can't make duaa for your own parent, because they aren't Muslim :| Ugh I'm blabbing, but yeah...I just can't wait to move. I had my scarf off today while on a road trip. It was just amazing. Something so simple, it felt so free and right. The world was beautiful and there was no angry god up there ready to destroy shit because ooh someone's hair was showing.

Sprout, that is a really interesting thing about whose parents ended up accepting them.
Quote
if the parents are smart/logical enough and have a strong enough relationship with the child, they'll usually choose their child over dogma/prejudice/bias etc, at least in the long run after the drama.

Absolutely.
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Reply #21 - December 12, 2012, 02:13 PM

I think it's interesting when I read the feelings when a hijabi takes off her hijab for the first time in a long time. Then read how new converts put it on, and they are ecstatic.

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Reply #22 - December 12, 2012, 02:49 PM

Do they say what I just said?

*edit* I just remembered a Soldiers of Allah lyric right after posting. "You are either a slave to what made man, or you are a slave to what man made"
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Reply #23 - December 12, 2012, 04:08 PM

not from Australia
but I'm an ex-Shia here, so I relate

welcome to the forum

btw, how's muharram going with you?
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Reply #24 - December 12, 2012, 05:45 PM

Hi Jilla, not sure if your a new member or was just posting in introductions as I see that you registered a while ago but nevertheless its a pleasure to welcome you.. Welcome to the forum
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Reply #25 - December 13, 2012, 01:15 AM

Jila, Aletheia is ancient Greek for "truth", and is also the Greek goddess/spirit/personification of truthfulness and sincerity. I just added the "Al" for teh lulz.

Yeah, Judaism seemed like your best bet from how you've described your family. Judaism doesn't proestylize (sp?) so my family would find it super weird if I became Jewish on them. My mum seems to think that the only alternatives to Islam are Christianity and Buddhism and her questions imply that she expects me to go into one of those if I leave Islam I guess in her eyes I'm too smart to become completely godless.
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Reply #26 - December 14, 2012, 11:09 AM

Quote
Jila, Aletheia is ancient Greek for "truth", and is also the Greek goddess/spirit/personification of truthfulness and sincerity. I just added the "Al" for teh lulz.

Cool

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Reply #27 - December 14, 2012, 04:34 PM
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Reply #28 - December 14, 2012, 10:39 PM

A Belated welcome to the forum, Jila.

I wish i can add more but i see that enough advice has already been given.

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Reply #29 - December 14, 2012, 10:53 PM

Quote from: Jila on December 12, 2012, 01:33 PM
Billy, yeah they're not violent. Just stupid and hurtful.

Al-Alethia (what does that mean btw?), I dunno about my dad and irreligiosity. I felt safe with Judaism because my circle is Jew-neutral, pro Israel (and a very strong dislike of Xtianity), but the vibe I got was like what you said there:

WTF?? I understand being Jew-neutral and have Jewish friends, but being Pro Israel is just sick

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