Welcome WowSignal, the others have given great advice and I can attest to the fact it is in your best interest to wait till you are financially and socailly stable position before owning up your apostasy.
Allah speaks to everyone at all the time, not only to the Messengers and Prophets’. He speaks to the ears of every heart, but it is not every heart that hears Him but many people did not understand a single word. Why? Because it is an inner language, its words are not the same as the words of the external language.
Allah tell us the warning signs of when it's time the soul leaves the body. Whether we know it or not.
Allah can speak to us in many ways...
Oh come on, You are just interpreting these fuzzy feelings to mean what you want them to mean. It's just a form of special pleading on your part to associate this with your particular brand of spirituality/theology.
Though I understand your analogy with the heart, it really is a pet peeve of mine when people allude to the heart having a bigger capacity than pumping blood. Also could you provide examples how exactly God speaks to you?. IS it audible? etc.