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Theme Changer

 Topic: Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"

 (Read 3960 times)
  • 12 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     OP - April 16, 2013, 08:07 PM

    ahhh, memories. I had to chuckle when I heard this song playing today and I remember back when of my Muslim pals came over, was on my PC and took it upon herself to erase it from my playlist.  LOL.  That is just one of many instances of friends overstepping their bounds and taking it upon themselves to be a shariah ninja, when it's like, totally NOT their business to do so.  Anybody else have some good stories like that?

    http://vimeo.com/3554226

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #1 - April 16, 2013, 08:14 PM

    OMFG yes. Getting my arm slapped by a niqabi friend because my sleeve was too short. Same girl pulls out your earphones if she notices you listening to music. So annoying finmad

    omg. that clip freaked me the fuck out. Why did I click it >_<

    Quote from: ZooBear 

    • Surah Al-Fil: In an epic game of Angry Birds, Allah uses birds (that drop pebbles) to destroy an army riding elephants whose intentions were to destroy the Kaaba. No one has beaten the high score.

  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #2 - April 18, 2013, 02:19 PM

    I sharia policed a Pakistani friend of mine back in the day. Sat him down and gave him a lecture about his drinking and being a Muslim. I'm surprised he didn't tell me to piss off. I was "forbidding the evil" with my words in my mind back then.

    -------------------
    Believe in yourself
    -------------------
    Strike me down and I'll just become another nail in your coffin
    -------------------
    There's such a thing as sheep in wolfs clothing... religious fanatics
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #3 - April 18, 2013, 02:34 PM

    Here's another one! I've had my ears pierced since I was 14 (my dad pierced them actually). I have kept them in because I like them and its s tradition from my Rajput heritage I want to keep. Grandfather and great grandfather had ears pierced too. 

    Anyway I used to go for Maghreb prayers and Iftar at this little masjid near my house. One day one of the guys came up and decided to have a talk with me. He told me that earrings were haraam because it was imitating women. I told him that if he thinks a big bald headed guy with a goatie like me is trying to imitate a woman then he must have pretty ugly women where he comes from. I also told him my ancestors were warriors and kings and having our ears pierced was our cultural tradition. I stopped going to that place soon after.

    -------------------
    Believe in yourself
    -------------------
    Strike me down and I'll just become another nail in your coffin
    -------------------
    There's such a thing as sheep in wolfs clothing... religious fanatics
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #4 - April 18, 2013, 02:43 PM

    Grin

    "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

    'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #5 - April 18, 2013, 02:45 PM

    That's funny Pepe  Cheesy

    I had this silver ring from my father. It had been around for ages and was one of the few things from my father that I had. I wore it on my left hand. A few “bros” started really digging into me for 1) wearing a ring and 2) wearing it on my left hand.

    I knew very well that the Prophet wore a ring, so when I mentioned that, they said that his ring was for a purpose, i.e., for stamping and sealing his letters since he was illiterate. My ring, they argued “imitated a wedding ring.” They then went on to talk about how if I was going to wear it, I should wear it on my right since the prophet preferred the right hand. I argued 1) there is no prohibition on wearing rings on the left hand, therefore it is mubah. And 2) as it was clearly not a wedding band, it was not in imitation of the dreaded “kuffar.” Also, because I do use my right hand for so much (I happen to be right handed) it was easier for me to keep it on my left so that it did not get in the way.

    They left me alone when they saw I could argue my case back and would not back down.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #6 - April 18, 2013, 02:53 PM

    Is not the phrase about taking the plank out of one own's eye before worrying about the speck in someone else's known in Islam?

    When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.


    A.A. Milne,

    "We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #7 - April 18, 2013, 02:53 PM

    Here's another one! I've had my ears pierced since I was 14 (my dad pierced them actually). I have kept them in because I like them and its s tradition from my Rajput heritage I want to keep. Grandfather and great grandfather had ears pierced too.  

    Anyway I used to go for Maghreb prayers and Iftar at this little masjid near my house. One day one of the guys came up and decided to have a talk with me. He told me that earrings were haraam because it was imitating women. I told him that if he thinks a big bald headed guy with a goatie like me is trying to imitate a woman then he must have pretty ugly women where he comes from. I also told him my ancestors were warriors and kings and having our ears pierced was our cultural tradition. I stopped going to that place soon after.

     Cheesy

    Quote from: ZooBear 

    • Surah Al-Fil: In an epic game of Angry Birds, Allah uses birds (that drop pebbles) to destroy an army riding elephants whose intentions were to destroy the Kaaba. No one has beaten the high score.

  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #8 - April 18, 2013, 03:06 PM

    Two of my friends in high school secretly liked the same girl and always had arguments. Unfortunately, the girl was only interested in one of the guys and she started dating him. When the other guy got jealous, he sharia-policed her about her bad habits of dating and she eventually stopped.


    Funniest sharia-policing I've ever seen  Cheesy
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #9 - April 18, 2013, 03:10 PM

    Here's another one! I've had my ears pierced since I was 14 (my dad pierced them actually). I have kept them in because I like them and its s tradition from my Rajput heritage I want to keep. Grandfather and great grandfather had ears pierced too. 

    Anyway I used to go for Maghreb prayers and Iftar at this little masjid near my house. One day one of the guys came up and decided to have a talk with me. He told me that earrings were haraam because it was imitating women. I told him that if he thinks a big bald headed guy with a goatie like me is trying to imitate a woman then he must have pretty ugly women where he comes from. I also told him my ancestors were warriors and kings and having our ears pierced was our cultural tradition. I stopped going to that place soon after.


    When Muslims complain about imperialism its so often such a crock of shit. Islam is such an imperialistic ideology its unreal. Manifestations of non Islamic heritage must be wiped out.


    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #10 - April 18, 2013, 03:12 PM

    @moi : The concept is there in Islam as far as I know, but the specific phrase is part of the Bible.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #11 - April 18, 2013, 03:14 PM

    How about having a sister over for lunch and she immediately walks into your house and squeals "audhu-billahi min aShaytaanir Rajeem" and shields her face from the pictures on your wall like she was a goddamn vampire who had just seen the sun pop out.

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #12 - April 18, 2013, 03:23 PM

    Depends what the pictures are of!

    When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.


    A.A. Milne,

    "We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #13 - April 18, 2013, 03:24 PM

    Or having people ask you o say "Masha Allah Tabarak Allah" whenever you go over their house, get in their car, see their kids, etc, for fear that your secret "jealousy" might give them the evil eye. That shit really pissed me off. I knew some wacko salafis who were hard core on that 'ayn nonsense.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #14 - April 18, 2013, 03:28 PM

    Moi, they were photos of my family!  LOL

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #15 - April 18, 2013, 03:30 PM

    Ugh, that kinda happened in my holiday in Somaliland. This woman (not sure if she was a relative) Was in the living room looking at the television and went all like 'ohh no, you're not supposed to watch tv, staying home and read the holy quran is better blablabla' ...  Roll Eyes How about you go home and read instead of looking at the tv?

    Also once when these women took our cardgames because of the joker was the incarnation of shaytaan. That shit costed money.  finmad
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #16 - April 18, 2013, 03:31 PM

    Or having people ask you o say "Masha Allah Tabarak Allah" whenever you go over their house, get in their car, see their kids, etc, for fear that your secret "jealousy" might give them the evil eye. That shit really pissed me off. I knew some wacko salafis who were hard core on that 'ayn nonsense.

    OMG how much do I hate that. Most of my comment are out of politeness too, it's not like I genuinely think her moustache is pretty. lol jk but yeah.

    Quote from: ZooBear 

    • Surah Al-Fil: In an epic game of Angry Birds, Allah uses birds (that drop pebbles) to destroy an army riding elephants whose intentions were to destroy the Kaaba. No one has beaten the high score.

  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #17 - April 18, 2013, 03:32 PM

    Just googled that and got this link

    http://salaf-us-saalih.com/2010/02/11/when-to-say-masha-allah-barakallah/

    Is being a Muslim like being in a play and following a script and all these others telling you stuff are propmpters telling you the correct lines if you go off script?

    Quote
    One Way Pendulum took Simpson from Sloane Square into the West End limelight with its picture of a variously obsessed suburban household in which, among several family preoccupations, a son trains a collection of weighing machines to sing the Hallelujah Chorus instead of speaking people’s weight. All except one obey his bidding. It goes on irritably booming: “Fifteen stone, ten pounds”.

    Explaining his motive for all this, the character Kirby Groomkirby says he wants to take the speak-your-weight machines to the North Pole and melt the ice around it. Meanwhile his father, Arthur Groomkirby, is building a do-it-yourself Old Bailey in his living room, only for a judge and jury mysteriously to move in to try him for some unspecified offence.


    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/obituaries/culture-obituaries/theatre-obituaries/8731685/NF-Simpson.html

    Quote
    All praises are due to Allah, Lord of the worlds and prayer and salutation upon our prophet, Muhammad, his family, his companions and those who follow them in goodness until the Day of Judgement.

    If a person sees that which amazes (pleases) him, pertaining to his wealth, then he should say Maashaa Allah Laa Quwwata illa billah, just as in the story of the companion of the two gardens, when his companion said to him: It was better for you to say, when you entered your garden: That which Allah wills there is no power except with Allah. This is if he sees something amazing (pleasing) with his wealth.

    If he sees it in other than himself then he should say Barakallahu Alaihi (May Allah bless it for him) or a statement similar to it.

    And if he sees something that amazes (pleases) him from the matters of the Dunya (world) he should say: Labbaik, Innal Aish, Aishul Aakhirah, as the Prophet ( ) used to say. So he says Labbaik meaning an answer to you then he said verily the (real) life is the life of the hereafter. He makes it firm within himself at the same instance that the Dunya and whatever is within it does not remain and there is not any life in it but verily the real life is the life of the hereafter.



    When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.


    A.A. Milne,

    "We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #18 - April 18, 2013, 03:34 PM

    LOL...So irritating. Me: "Nice car bro" Them (desperately): "Akhi, please say masha Allah!!"  
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #19 - April 18, 2013, 03:39 PM

    So most things are scripted - I would argue that the vast majority of non-muslims do not know this, and that therefore Monty Python and Charlie Chaplin are definitely required.


    When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.


    A.A. Milne,

    "We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #20 - April 18, 2013, 03:42 PM

    LOL...So irritating. Me: "Nice car bro" Them (desperately): "Akhi, please say masha Allah!!"  


    HOLY SHIT, my friend always says that. I always thought he said that because he just wanted comfort in knowing that other people like his stuff. Haha, thanks for telling me the real reason HM Grin
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #21 - April 18, 2013, 04:04 PM

    Oh oh! I also know of an uncle who sawed off the crosses on the kings on a chess set his kids had. Also know one uncle who threw away the pigs from a plastic farm set his kids had lol

    -------------------
    Believe in yourself
    -------------------
    Strike me down and I'll just become another nail in your coffin
    -------------------
    There's such a thing as sheep in wolfs clothing... religious fanatics
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #22 - April 18, 2013, 04:05 PM

     Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Spit my water up  Cheesy
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #23 - April 18, 2013, 04:16 PM

    Oh oh! I also know of an uncle who sawed off the crosses on the kings on a chess set his kids had.

    Isn't chess haram?

    The only thing we have to fear is fear itself
    - 32nd United States President Franklin D. Roosevelt
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #24 - April 18, 2013, 04:40 PM

    ^ That's exactly what I was thinking Luthiel!

    He should have just taken gasoline and a match to the whole thing!

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #25 - April 18, 2013, 04:43 PM

    http://www.inter-islam.org/Prohibitions/Chess.html

    Methinks that it was outlawed in order that the Prophets lil sheep would not work up the wits to ever mentally out-maneuver him.

    Cult leaders always hate chess players.

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #26 - May 05, 2013, 04:26 PM

    OMFG yes. Getting my arm slapped by a niqabi friend because my sleeve was too short. Same girl pulls out your earphones if she notices you listening to music. So annoying finmad

    omg. that clip freaked me the fuck out. Why did I click it >_<

     


    LOL

    speaking of getting sharia policed by friends.

    In high school  my salafi friend would say "are you coming to jummah?" 

    Me "no i umm have something to do " (i was a murtad by then and didn't want to go to jummah"

    " jummah is compulsory brother you are coming"

    * proceeds to grab my arm and try to literally drag me off to jumah"

    him being a foot taller than em didn't help  Cheesy

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #27 - May 05, 2013, 04:29 PM

    Isn't chess haram?

     

    Backgammon is haraam not chess as far as I know. There is no hadith or quran verse about chess IIRC.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #28 - May 05, 2013, 07:11 PM

    OMFG yes. Getting my arm slapped by a niqabi friend because my sleeve was too short. Same girl pulls out your earphones if she notices you listening to music. So annoying finmad

    omg. that clip freaked me the fuck out. Why did I click it >_<


    If it was me, I would have slap her out of reflex Grin

    Two of my friends in high school secretly liked the same girl and always had arguments. Unfortunately, the girl was only interested in one of the guys and she started dating him. When the other guy got jealous, he sharia-policed her about her bad habits of dating and she eventually stopped.


    Funniest sharia-policing I've ever seen  Cheesy


    Islamic style cockblock Cheesy Cheesy



    "I'm standing here like an asshole holding my Charles Dickens"

    "No theory,No ready made system,no book that has ever been written to save the world. i cleave to no system.."-Bakunin
  • Gettin' Shariah Policed by Your "Friends"
     Reply #29 - May 05, 2013, 08:44 PM

    I sharia policed a Pakistani friend of mine back in the day. Sat him down and gave him a lecture about his drinking and being a Muslim. I'm surprised he didn't tell me to piss off. I was "forbidding the evil" with my words in my mind back then.

     

    lol

    If your still in contact with that friend buy him a drink at the bar to make up for the shaira policing u did back then.

    Grin

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
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