confessions of an iraqi ex-shiite
OP - May 10, 2013, 02:55 PM
I figured this would be the best place to write my letter to the muslim nations. Since I am new and all and I really want to engage in this matter.
If you would like to take part off my story you are more than welcome. If not, well, dont read it at all, it's up to you.
I was born in Sweden to shiah parents from Iraq, who had fled the war with Iran a few years earlier. My parents were never especially religious, they were what we call ''culture''-muslims, kind off like how the average american believe in god. In Sweden, my father drove cabs and my mom studied.
I was one out of three simblings and we grew up in a suburb just north off Stockholm. If anybody knows the situation in immigrant suburbs in Sweden ( and actually in most of Europe ) you know non-europeans tend to live in big concrete apartments with douzens off ethnicities. Most of these suburbs consists of a few kindergartens, a drugstore, a couple off grocery stores, library and tobacco stores. What differs immigrant communities in Sweden from the swedish communities is higher levels of social unrest. It is far more likely that a young, immigrant male become engaged in crime than it is for swedish boys to do the same. This is a result of poor integration and immigration politics, where the intake off immigrants have been completely reactionary and based on conflicts. In other words, there has been no good planning on how to integrate immigrants and thus entire portions off the suburbs can become 80-90% immigrants pretty soon following a refugee wave. Not much different from certain other european countries.
Nevertheless, growing up in an immigrant suburb, it's not strange if you come in contact with crime pretty early. At age 14, some of the boys in my suburb spent their time mugging others and snatching bikes. My father wouldnt let me go outside after 9 o'clock for many years, because he was afraid I would get hurt ( or hurt someone ).
He tried to make me come in contact with the religious side so I got got morals. He put the quran in my hands and told me to read it. I did read the quran alot, probably every day for 6 months or so. But as I began asking my dad about it and questioning certain things, I found out my dad wasnt very adept in the scripture himself. This made me wonder why we would call ourselves muslims in the first place. But I kept up with the religion for most of my teenage years, as it did keep me away from crime, I became more and more interested in politics instead. I had the pretty basic ''muslim point off view'' on foreign affairs, including Palestine, the Iraq war etc.
However, my views on religion would change forever, following my parents taking a trip to Iraq so they could join my cousin's wedding. This was in 2006, which was the year sectarian violence in Iraq was at it's peak. I didnt know that, but I would find out:
Because both my parents were killed on this wedding by sunni insurgents. A great portion off my family and friends in Iraq were just whiped off the face of the earth within one night. Me and my simblings were completely broken and shattered at this. We cried for days to an end and my sister had to deal with permanent depression. Around this time, as I moved to my fathers cousin in Gothenburg, I really began questioning religion and the purpose off my family's plight. As time passed, my belief in god simply faded away. Around 2010, I couldnt even remember why I have had faith in the first place. I occasionally called myself a muslim, just for the sake, but I never really believed. Then one day, I came across the late, great Christopher Hitchens. After just a 10 minute speech, it came so ridicolously clear to me why religion is so unbelievably pointless and stupid. I just couldnt find any rationale for islam anymore. I couldnt find myself in the extremely immoral teachings off the prophet Mohammed. I just couldnt understand, how a human being with the knowledge off evolution, the big bang, atoms etc can still believe in god.
As time passed, I became much more hostile towards islam as a faith. Reminded about the fact that my parents had been butchered by sunnis over 1400 year old politics, hearing about apostates who fear for their life, the Mohammed comics etc. It just struck me as profane and stupid. Most religions come across as irrational, but because I come from islam, I guess it entitles me to criticize it more fiercly than say catholicism or judaism.
I still hang out with muslims, most of my family are still muslims in that sense, most of my friends from Iraq, Iran, Morocco, Lebanon etc are still somewhat muslim. Not devout, kind off like how I was. But I know for a fact, that there are more than enough people in the islamic world that can come through the same realization as I did. I sincerely wish they do, because for as long as the religion is in charge in this region, we will still face problems. If any muslim reads this right now and doubts his faith the least:
think about it, is it possible that the quran is so profoundly amazing that it couldnt possibly have been written by a human. Is there not anything in the quran that makes you question teh credibility? Is there nothing on the moral aspects you could imagine to change? Do you sincerely believe it is a just punishment to cut the hand off thieves?
Do you believe Mohammed was the perfect human being off all time? If you are really honest with yourself, you will know within time it is simply not the cause. Like most muslims say: read the hadith and the quran, consider if this COULD be the word off god. But also consider the possibility it is not.
Peace be with you.
clarification off my avatar:
the scientific method: here are the facts. What conclusion can we draw from them?
the religious method: here is the conclusion. What facts can we find to support it?