What jedi said. I didn't mean it to solely rest on a fathers view, I was just using that example and that what was being discussed. I personally don't have an issue with having gender roles, I'm not really a feminist in that sense, I don't think men and women have to be the same in all respects within reason, so it doesn't bother me that the equivalent wouldn't happen with a son, with a woman having to ask per say, but I would say she still needs to meet the family. I see no problem with a father being protective of his daughter, why must it equate to property? Parents wants to make sure that the man marrying his daughter isn't a knobhead the same way he wouldn't want his son to be a with a knobhead. I think its respectful to consult them or meet them, its a traditional way of thinking but parents often feel like their child is leaving them, so I don't see harm in making them feel a part of it. I personally would introduce someone to my mum first, neither would decide for me, but to make them feel like they are valued I would ask them what they think. As much as we like to think we know everything, and yes there are things we know better than our parents but they do have some wisdom.
As much as the relationship is between the couple, your family is a big part of your life. I'm not even close to my parents, but I just have this weird empathy and respect for how they may feel.
I have no problem with introducing the person I want to marry to my parents and have them involved in my life. So I am with you there, Jibbs.
I guess I just don't like the idea of having a guy ask my dad for permission. My dad has no authority over me. Though I definitely appreciate his input, he cannot ban me from getting married to someone. I would equate it to property because this is a tradition steeped in sexism. A man only asked a dad for permission because the woman couldn't get married without it. There's a difference between my dad liking and approving of someone and him actually being asked for permission.
Am I looking at this from a feminist perspective? Yeah, probably. I don't want men and women to be the same. Still, I don't understand why this tradition still thrives.
If it happens because a father is overprotective over his daughter, then why doesn't he feel the same way over his son? Why doesn't he feel the same way about the woman his son marries as he does with the man his daughter marries? Why is it only the father whose permission is asked?
I'm sorry, Jibbs, I love reading your posts, I just don't fully agree with you on this point. I hope I don't come off as being rude.
Topic: Opinions on arranged marriages?