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Theme Changer

 Topic: Why did lua cross the road?

 (Read 10248 times)
  • 12 3 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     OP - April 27, 2014, 06:58 PM














    To get to her seminar.
    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #1 - April 27, 2014, 06:59 PM
    To give me her sister's number.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #2 - April 27, 2014, 07:02 PM
    Has she honoured her promise yet Quod?
    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #3 - April 27, 2014, 07:03 PM
    to kiss me
    "I Knew who I was this morning, but I've changed a few times since then." Alice in wonderland

    "This is the only heaven we have how dare you make it a hell" Dr Marlene Winell
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #4 - April 27, 2014, 07:16 PM
    Quote from: Quod Sum Eris on April 27, 2014, 06:59 PM
    To give me her sister's number.

    You have to use a biology pick up line to woo her.

    Trying using this one I read somewhere:
    I wish I was the enzyme 'DNA helicase' so I can unzip your genes.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #5 - April 27, 2014, 07:30 PM
    So here is a bad joke:

    Why did the biochemist (Lua) cross the road?

    She wanted to visit the Cysteine Chapel.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #6 - April 27, 2014, 07:33 PM
    Oh my God  Cheesy

    Ily guys.

     001_wub I would cross the road for all of you. Even Quod.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #7 - April 27, 2014, 07:48 PM
    The fuck?
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #8 - April 27, 2014, 07:52 PM
    You did warn me that my sister's life will be devoid of color if she loses you...I'm the one who would be blamed for having crossed the road to give you her number.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #9 - April 27, 2014, 07:55 PM
    I'm sure we'll live happily ever after. Or, you know, until she loses her looks.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #10 - April 27, 2014, 07:57 PM
     Cheesy Dear God, please don't let her lose her looks on Quod's watch.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #11 - April 27, 2014, 08:02 PM
    Nah, I'm not that vain.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #12 - April 27, 2014, 08:04 PM
    Well, in that case, I reckon you have my blessing.  yes
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #13 - April 27, 2014, 08:05 PM
    Hi guys, I'm looking for a gay Imam to perform a wedding ceremony.

    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #14 - April 27, 2014, 08:08 PM
    Have you tried Daayiee Abdullah?
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #15 - April 27, 2014, 08:11 PM
    Nope, I want an Imam who is gay & is a salafi.
    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #16 - April 27, 2014, 08:12 PM
    He usually has evening drinks at the Cock and Bull.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #17 - April 27, 2014, 08:14 PM
    Here is my gay imam criterion:

    - Must live in Saudi Arabia & be openly Gay.
    - Must have a ginger beard which measures 12.7 cm in length.
    - Must have a civil partner named David (or Daawood)
    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #18 - April 27, 2014, 08:55 PM
    Why did lua cross the road? Because she was carbon bonded to the chicken!
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #19 - April 27, 2014, 09:03 PM
    Quote from: Qtian on April 27, 2014, 08:11 PM
    Nope, I want an Imam who is gay & is a salafi.


    You have that gay Imam in France, he was initially a Salafi. Left Islam, became a Buddhist, and then came back to Islam because it was an intrinsic part of him. "It's like losing your arm". So not sure if he still identifies, or has similar views, as his old Salafi self. But that is probably the closest you'll get Wink
    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #20 - April 27, 2014, 11:16 PM
    tell me more cornflower
    "I Knew who I was this morning, but I've changed a few times since then." Alice in wonderland

    "This is the only heaven we have how dare you make it a hell" Dr Marlene Winell
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #21 - April 27, 2014, 11:20 PM
    Quote from: Qtian on April 27, 2014, 08:14 PM
    - Must have a civil partner named David (or Daawood)



    I had one for you until you edited his name criterion.
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #22 - April 28, 2014, 05:14 AM
    Agno, there's two threads about it somewhere on the forum. One of them was started by me. Google him, gay mosque or imam France and you'll find him Smiley
    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #23 - April 28, 2014, 06:38 AM
    Agno, Muhsin Hendricks is an openly gay Imam here in Cape Town, see more theinnercircle.org.za

    If I am not mistaken the guy from France got married by Muhsin
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #24 - April 28, 2014, 08:08 AM
    Thank Zhivago, I have actually heard of this guy, My mum was talking about him in disgust, 'How can you be gay and an imaan! What is happening to our muslims.'

    Mums words

    Checking those out

    Ye Cornflower I am interested on reading how he came back to islam, But im assuming now he came back to a reformed Islam
    "I Knew who I was this morning, but I've changed a few times since then." Alice in wonderland

    "This is the only heaven we have how dare you make it a hell" Dr Marlene Winell
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #25 - April 28, 2014, 08:20 AM
    He came back to his own version of Islam. Given the fact that he speaks of Islam as an intrinsic part of himself, I guess he just couldn't manage to build an identity which wasn't connected to Islam in some way. That's the sad part that a lot of Middle Eastern and Asian culture is overly focused on Islam, so much so that their cultural heritage that has nothing to do with it is lost. Just like the Arabic language, all pre-Islamic literature (oral or written) was "lost" and the Quran became the norm. It's like taking one of Shakespeare's works and saying that this is now the only literature we build our understanding of the English language on.
    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #26 - April 28, 2014, 08:23 AM
    It's funny how people look down on an "Imam" who is gay and supports homosexual monogamous relationships with adult consenting partners, while people see no problem with an "Imam" who conducts a marriage between a 11-year old girl and a grown man more than twice her age. Really puts things in perspective, doesn't it?
    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #27 - April 28, 2014, 10:11 AM
    Quote from: Cornflower on April 28, 2014, 08:20 AM
    He came back to his own version of Islam. Given the fact that he speaks of Islam as an intrinsic part of himself, I guess he just couldn't manage to build an identity which wasn't connected to Islam in some way. That's the sad part that a lot of Middle Eastern and Asian culture is overly focused on Islam, so much so that their cultural heritage that has nothing to do with it is lost. Just like the Arabic language, all pre-Islamic literature (oral or written) was "lost" and the Quran became the norm. It's like taking one of Shakespeare's works and saying that this is now the only literature we build our understanding of the English language on.


    converts are coerced into forsaking their own cultural things and replacing them with a narrow Arabic-Salafi identity. Lots of self-loathing in high religiosity non Arab Muslims. 
    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    Quote from: arX on May 01, 2011, 03:33 AM
    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #28 - April 28, 2014, 10:24 AM
    Coerced is the right word, even if it is done directly or indirectly. The whole "you shall not imitate the disbelievers" is a very tricky rule to apply. What if it is your culture, but you're not a "disbeliever". What culture should you adopt? A lot of converts go through serious identity crisis, change name and style of clothing and way of talking and eating and everything. All my friends were literally astounded by the fact that I didn't adopt my husband's cuisine or that I didn't start wearing Arab "home gowns and dresses".
    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Why did lua cross the road?
     Reply #29 - April 28, 2014, 10:32 AM
    you shall not imitate the disbelievers is just a call to hatred.

    How can a Muslim live in the modern world without imitating the disbelievers? Common humanity makes you do the same things as everyone else. Hence it focuses on a narrow, austere, fetishised difference, in clothing, language, ever more tendency to separatism, all the while demonising non Muslims, because they are the 'other' that are so impure you cannot 'imitate' them.

    When Muslims use the internet, drive cars, live in kaffir countries they are 'imitating' the disbelievers. Seriously, Salafism is such a colossal fuck up and affront to human dignity and decency and humanity, its pathetic.
    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    Quote from: arX on May 01, 2011, 03:33 AM
    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

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