The Koran and it's main message.
Reply #5 - March 16, 2015, 07:27 PM
Look at this thing. Look at this thing. Look at all this cool stuff. Obviously there is an all powerful creator (who also knows everything, and cares if you masturbate). But not more than one, that's just ridiculous. This creator is also talking to me and I can totally prove it because I can write some nice poetry that is more or less unique and it doesn't have any contradictions.
This God tells me that he needs complete and total obedience. His commands will be made known through what I say. His commands involve putting the prophet in control of booty, allowing the prophet to marry whomever he desires, fighting for the prophet, not causing the prophet significant annoyance, and spending considerable parts of His revelation making sure that the prophet's wives behave and are not promiscuous. I work my ass off being a prophet for God and so he grants me a few nice things. It's clearly not enough that I am having all the secrets of the universe and the meaning of life being beamed directly into my head and have complete assurance that I will one day live forever in absolute paradise while others just have to take my word for it.
You think I'm making this shit up? Well let me reasonably counter that contention by talking about how God will burn you forever for not trusting me and how those who obey my message and lose their lives fighting for me will live in absolute bliss forever. You can have no experience of these realms to verify their existence until you are safely dead and cannot warn others or enact revenge on me were I lying. I expect nothing but unwavering loyalty and obedience as this is God's absolute final word on how things are and should be. After all, moral questions are not going to become far more nuanced as technology and society evolves, so God is going to include very specific precepts about how much property females should inherit, how a women's testimony should count as half of a man's, and wise eternal punishments such as cutting off hands for stealing.
Also, God is really gonna focus on making this good poetry rather than precise, unambiguous statements on how the world works and how you should act leading to wildly varying interpretations of the text. God's gonna write this in clear Arabic so everyone can understand it (everyone understands Arabic right?). It's not like the vast majority of the people who will learn about this religion will have no clue how to read this Arabic dialect and have to rely on translations that make this book look wholly unimpressive, repetitive, and inaccurate. When making statements about how the world works, God will use poetic statements such as "the sun's place of setting is in a murky spring" which a literal reading reflects common belief at the time, but has a far deeper poetic meaning that only God knows. Good communication isn't about clearly expressing ideas to another person. It involves flaunting the fact that you know the meaning of certain phrases that they don't.
Oh yeah, and don't ask questions that may trouble you unless I am there to diffuse the situation. If these questions confuse you and make you wonder if this whole thing is true, God will have no choice but to horribly burn you forever. Don't make God do that.
Humbly,
Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon me)
"I moreover believe that any religion that has anything in it that shocks the mind of a child, cannot be a true system."
-Thomas Paine
Topic: The Koran and it's main message.