Introduction
OP - March 07, 2016, 04:53 AM
Hello Everyone,
I became a member a few days ago, but have been reading posts for a few weeks. What an interesting and stimulating forum, apart from which we also seem to be saving lives. I'd like to, where I can and where wanted, add my voice to those who support others going through the experience of reclaiming their minds. I'm also interested in reclaiming our bodies and reclaiming our lives. For now, I want to write mainly on "apostasy" (in inverted commas for a reason) as this is closest to my heart at the moment. I do have a blog, but it's probably not etiquette to provide the link in an introduction. So I'll share that later. My profile says enough.
In terms of history, I left religion 37 years ago, having been brought up Muslim. Thankfully, for me the experience of leaving Islam was a positive one. At 22, I sat my parents down and told them calmly and directly that I no longer have a religion. My mum accepted it immediately without any reservations at all. My dad oohed and aahed a bit over how people will know "what kind of person you are." He found it pretty much impossible to conceptualise anyone without their religious bracket, as if you can't be a human being without having some or other religion. For about a month he tried to semi-subtly urge me back to Islam, but then gave up.
We had the misfortune of living up the road from the mosque, which meant that whenever some luminary came to town, a drone army fanned out to knock on doors and invite the faithful to a special sermon that night. It was the next time that this happened and I happened to answer the door, that I learned of my father's acceptance of my decision. The bearded ones at the door greeted me politely and asked my name (I still had my original name). When I told them, there were many Masha-Allahs and many outstretched hands (Islam in Cape Town at the time was somewhat like that in Bosnia, pretty laid-back). I responded to their invitation by saying: "Thank you, but I thought only Muslims were invited to such things." Startled, they said, "But you are a Muslim," to which I replied that I am not. "But, but, your name is Muslim," came several holy splutters. I then proceeded to lecture them on how a name doesn't have a religion and mentioned several names that defied their logic, like Amine and Bachir Gemayel, Lebanese Christians who were all over the news at the time. Did they think these men were Muslim? By this point a minor turbulence was beginning to form on our doorstep, at which point my dad appeared beside me wearing his religious cap.
"Salam-alaikum" he said. They greeted back and in panic asked,
"Is this your child?"
"Yes," said my father.
"Have you heard what she just said?"
"Yes," said my father.
The minor turbulence was now a major one. The oldest of the visitors, who'd been standing quietly to the side throughout rubbing his beard, now spoke.
"Will you join us in the mosque tonight, insha-Allah?" he asked my father.
"Insha-Allah, I will be there," said my father.
A cacophony of "Alhamdulilla!", "Insha-Allah!" and "Masha-Allah!" followed, whereupon the turbaned ones beat a hasty retreat.
When I looked to my side, my dad had already gone back into the house. He never referred to this incident ever again and I respected his space. Thus did I know that my dad, too, had accepted. The only two sad things are that my father died ten years ago, and Islam there has become ugly, very ugly indeed.
New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality.
http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli