Unhappy Ex-Muslims

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- movingfeet
- The Sin Of Greed
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- Love is always the culprit.
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Unhappy Ex-Muslims
Reply #60 - June 22, 2016, 12:03 AM

Interesting. Three would be interested in that for sure.

"Work without hope draws nectar in a sieve, and hope without an object cannot live." -Coleridge

http://sinofgreed.wordpress.com/
- Elifaz
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Unhappy Ex-Muslims
Reply #61 - July 02, 2016, 07:03 PM

(I'm so grateful this place exists... just rediscovered CEMB after a long time... particularly hard day!)

I've lived with depression a long time and I'm not sure if it got better or worse after I left Islam. I totally get the idea of the "Void" the OP referred to.

Islam provided me with a mythology to live my life by, to psychologically lean on and without that it became like "What's the point?". Since I left Islam in my early 20s I have tried to fill that void and struggled immensely (now 31).

I believe deeply that spirituality helps me to manage depression, however on a deeper level there is an element of belief needed that I am "worth saving" and life often feels like a roller coaster or a rapids that pulls me around far too often. Ramadan in particular is a difficult time because the extended family shifts gears and I have to distance myself to stay intact. I've consumed a lot of self help books and had to set a lot of boundaries but sometimes it feels like the work is never ending.

When I meditate (very rarely), read certain spiritual texts or just get away from people and immerse myself in nature I get moments of peace which make the striving in between worthwhile... it's like a glimpse that there is something deeper going on.

I have also tried to go back to Islam from time to time but I have now realised it damages my heart too much to even try and I have to protect my inner child which is what it's all about for me. I try to do whatever makes that kid happy, because i think he's wiser than I could ever be. Forgiveness of Allah and Muslims and all of the crazy shit that goes on daily in this world is also a good practice. I say all this stuff like I actually practice it regularly - I don't! I aspire to... I was so depressed today I have spent most of it lying down! But I cant deny i have seen progress in my life from the early days of post religious trauma (PRT - it's real!)... it's a process.... I am not giving up yet.
- three
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Unhappy Ex-Muslims
Reply #62 - July 02, 2016, 07:53 PM

Quote from: movingfeet on June 22, 2016, 12:03 AM
Interesting. Three would be interested in that for sure.

I was. I found it when I really needed it, about three years ago, and just knowing that someone had labeled this made a huge difference in my outlook. That was even before I was diagnosed with PTSD.

Don't let Hitler have the street.
- cosmicdancer
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Reply #63 - July 02, 2016, 10:01 PM

Yes, PRT is very real and as I've said before it's like being hit by a speeding train but you can't see the injuries.
- asbie
- Actually just a dude
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Reply #64 - July 02, 2016, 10:36 PM

Quote from: Elifaz on July 02, 2016, 07:03 PM
(I'm so grateful this place exists... just rediscovered CEMB after a long time... particularly hard day!)

I've lived with depression a long time and I'm not sure if it got better or worse after I left Islam. I totally get the idea of the "Void" the OP referred to.

Islam provided me with a mythology to live my life by, to psychologically lean on and without that it became like "What's the point?". Since I left Islam in my early 20s I have tried to fill that void and struggled immensely (now 31).

I believe deeply that spirituality helps me to manage depression, however on a deeper level there is an element of belief needed that I am "worth saving" and life often feels like a roller coaster or a rapids that pulls me around far too often. Ramadan in particular is a difficult time because the extended family shifts gears and I have to distance myself to stay intact. I've consumed a lot of self help books and had to set a lot of boundaries but sometimes it feels like the work is never ending.

When I meditate (very rarely), read certain spiritual texts or just get away from people and immerse myself in nature I get moments of peace which make the striving in between worthwhile... it's like a glimpse that there is something deeper going on.

I have also tried to go back to Islam from time to time but I have now realised it damages my heart too much to even try and I have to protect my inner child which is what it's all about for me. I try to do whatever makes that kid happy, because i think he's wiser than I could ever be. Forgiveness of Allah and Muslims and all of the crazy shit that goes on daily in this world is also a good practice. I say all this stuff like I actually practice it regularly - I don't! I aspire to... I was so depressed today I have spent most of it lying down! But I cant deny i have seen progress in my life from the early days of post religious trauma (PRT - it's real!)... it's a process.... I am not giving up yet.

Your story is inspiring, and I'm glad that you have found a place like this helpful. Keep on going, my friend, we will conquer this demon yet.

Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
how fuck works without shit??

Let's Play Chess!

harakaat, friend, RIP
- yeezevee
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Unhappy Ex-Muslims
Reply #65 - July 02, 2016, 10:44 PM

Quote from: asbie on July 02, 2016, 10:36 PM
Your story is inspiring, and I'm glad that you have found a place.............y:

asbie. dear asbie., Elifaz joined the forum almost a year before you he found this place before you .. lol..

Do not let silence become your legacy.. Question everything
I renounced my faith to become a kafir,
the beloved betrayed me and turned in to a Muslim
- asbie
- Actually just a dude
- Poster of the Month
- Past, present, future...
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Reply #66 - July 02, 2016, 10:46 PM

Regardless, I'm still glad he found it!

Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
how fuck works without shit??

Let's Play Chess!

harakaat, friend, RIP
- Bee
- Un-muslim
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Unhappy Ex-Muslims
Reply #67 - July 05, 2016, 11:27 PM

For some people they want an answer about how they fit into the universe, what is their part in nature's pattern. We might wonder if there is more than eat, sleep, multiply and die. The existential question.

Humans have children for hope of the future or just because they forgot contraception. Maybe get a dog. Otherwise we wonder what if we were never born, how would the universe be? Who will feed my dog? If I kill myself then would that just be the end? (Not contemplating suicide).

I worked on my own belief system with a few goals

1) make myself more moral, better, happier person
2) improve my relationships with others and make me more compassionate, loving
3) guard our home the earth

This can be done with/without believing in a deity.

The unreligion, only one calorie
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