Finally! - No scarf!

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- Stardust
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Finally! - No scarf!
OP - May 13, 2009, 04:44 PM

I would just like to share with you that I have finally got rid of the scarf.

Firstly I made it somewhat obvious that I was taking the scarf off after I left home, so my mum had a talk with me, but I didn't say anything. And then one day I just let it slip off my head with no care when I got in my car, the next day I didn't wear it and got out the house to my car, mum saw and said nothing. And only the other day I wore no scarf infront of my dad when leaving the house!!!

Wooooo!!!

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #1 - May 13, 2009, 04:46 PM

Whoohoo

I'm so happy for you, I love love love feeling the breeze blowing through my hair so I know you are loving it too.

The bunny's happy for you too.

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #2 - May 13, 2009, 04:49 PM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 04:44 PM
I would just like to share with you that I have finally got rid of the scarf.

Firstly I made it somewhat obvious that I was taking the scarf off after I left home, so my mum had a talk with me, but I didn't say anything. And then one day I just let it slip off my head with no care when I got in my car, the next day I didn't wear it and got out the house to my car, mum saw and said nothing. And only the other day I wore no scarf infront of my dad when leaving the house!!!

Wooooo!!!

Hope they continue to take it well - good luck
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #3 - May 13, 2009, 04:49 PM

Good for you and good luck.

"Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny." - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #4 - May 13, 2009, 04:52 PM

Quote from: BerberElla on May 13, 2009, 04:46 PM
Whoohoo

I'm so happy for you, I love love love feeling the breeze blowing through my hair so I know you are loving it too.

The bunny's happy for you too.

Yep, on to bigger goals now :p lol

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #5 - May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM

Lol remember "don't walk before you can run" so no mass orgies yet.

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #6 - May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM

Congratulations and well done. Was it difficult?

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #7 - May 13, 2009, 05:01 PM

Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM
Congratulations and well done. Was it difficult?

Thanks everyone

BerberElla - LOL

Not really, I think it's to do with getting them used to an idea gradually, I guess everyone reacts defensively to change. I've always worn 'western' clothes, like trousers and tops (no skirts or revealling clothes) I've worn fitting clothes, but still was made to wear the scarf from a young age, mum also did try, when I was younger (teenager) to get me to wear more traditional clothes, but since she made me wear more western clothes than traditional when i was a kid, I stuck with it. So It wasn't a major change, just the scarf.

Now I can go out and give the right impression to people, that is - Im not a muslim.

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #8 - May 13, 2009, 05:04 PM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 05:01 PM
Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM
Congratulations and well done. Was it difficult?

Thanks everyone

BerberElla - LOL

Not really, I think it's to do with getting them used to an idea gradually, I guess everyone reacts defensively to change. I've always worn 'western' clothes, like trousers and tops (no skirts or revealling clothes) I've worn fitting clothes, but still was made to wear the scarf from a young age, mum also did try, when I was younger (teenager) to get me to wear more traditional clothes, but since she made me wear more western clothes than traditional when i was a kid, I stuck with it. So It wasn't a major change, just the scarf.

Now I can go out and give the right impression to people, that is - Im not a muslim.

That's good and well done again! I've been trying to shave my beard for ages, but I still have a hairy face! I don't know why I can't do it!

Religion - The hot potato that looked delicious but ended up burning your mouth!

Knock your head on the ground, don't be miserly in your prayers, listen to your Sidi Sheikh, Allahu Akbar! - Lounes Matoub
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #9 - May 13, 2009, 05:05 PM

Congrats!

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #10 - May 13, 2009, 05:12 PM

Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 05:04 PM
Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 05:01 PM
Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM
Congratulations and well done. Was it difficult?

That's good and well done again! I've been trying to shave my beard for ages, but I still have a hairy face! I don't know why I can't do it!

Why is that? your family make you keep a beard? Hmm that must be harder, since a scarf you can take off and put on, a beard you shave off you cant really grow it back straight away. How about cutting it a little shorter? but noticible and see how they react.

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #11 - May 13, 2009, 05:16 PM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 05:12 PM
Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM

That's good and well done again! I've been trying to shave my beard for ages, but I still have a hairy face! I don't know why I can't do it!

Why is that? your family make you keep a beard? Hmm that must be harder, since a scarf you can take off and put on, a beard you shave off you cant really grow it back straight away. How about cutting it a little shorter? but noticible and see how they react.

No-one has ever made me keep a beard, it will just be a massive shock to everyone if i get rid of it now after years of having it! And I really can't be bothered with everyone asking me why I shaved it off, and telling me about what the punishment is for shaving!

Religion - The hot potato that looked delicious but ended up burning your mouth!

Knock your head on the ground, don't be miserly in your prayers, listen to your Sidi Sheikh, Allahu Akbar! - Lounes Matoub
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #12 - May 13, 2009, 05:19 PM

Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 05:16 PM
Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 05:12 PM
Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM

That's good and well done again! I've been trying to shave my beard for ages, but I still have a hairy face! I don't know why I can't do it!

Why is that? your family make you keep a beard? Hmm that must be harder, since a scarf you can take off and put on, a beard you shave off you cant really grow it back straight away. How about cutting it a little shorter? but noticible and see how they react.

No-one has ever made me keep a beard, it will just be a massive shock to everyone if i get rid of it now after years of having it! And I really can't be bothered with everyone asking me why I shaved it off, and telling me about what the punishment is for shaving!

I shaved my beard while I was still a Muslim. Partly to piss off the Salafis at Islamia School. They told me that it was Haram - I basically told them to get stuffed

As it happens I let it grow back and shave it again - I prefer it with a bit of stubble.
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #13 - May 13, 2009, 05:20 PM

I prefer waxing mine, smoother finish.

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #14 - May 13, 2009, 05:24 PM

Quote from: BerberElla on May 13, 2009, 05:20 PM
I prefer waxing mine, smoother finish.

What kind of beard is that?

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #15 - May 13, 2009, 05:27 PM

Lol the hairy kind.

I can't believe you just tried to connect a beard to sexual innuendo you joker.

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #16 - May 13, 2009, 05:27 PM

Not that I have a beard........fingers crossed. (as in hopeful wishes finger crossing, not fingers crossed and lying lol)

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #17 - May 13, 2009, 05:41 PM

Quote from: BerberElla on May 13, 2009, 05:27 PM
I can't believe you just tried to connect a beard to sexual innuendo you joker.

There are two kinds of beards. The one that grows on the face and...

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #18 - May 13, 2009, 06:06 PM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 04:44 PM
I would just like to share with you that I have finally got rid of the scarf.

Firstly I made it somewhat obvious that I was taking the scarf off after I left home, so my mum had a talk with me, but I didn't say anything. And then one day I just let it slip off my head with no care when I got in my car, the next day I didn't wear it and got out the house to my car, mum saw and said nothing. And only the other day I wore no scarf infront of my dad when leaving the house!!!

Wooooo!!!

Well done and Gz! =]
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #19 - May 13, 2009, 06:29 PM

Good going Stardust

I think the best way to loosen your parent's grip on you is to chip away at it bit by bit. Space out your battles so the defeats don't seem to pile up on them too much.
Eventually they will loose the will to resist and come to accept their loss of control.

You should have seen my Bangladeshi father-in-law. He was a completely broken man after my wife (then girlfriend) moved in with me (her idea, not mine). After that a marriage seemed the less scandalous thing for him to swallow.
He's recovered swimmingly however. We gave him some grandkids which he adores, and he's learned to use me as his IT guy, chaufer, tax consultant, financial advisor and general handyman.

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #20 - May 13, 2009, 09:20 PM

Congratulations, Stardust.

Quote from: BerberElla on May 13, 2009, 05:27 PM
Lol the hairy kind.

I can't believe you just tried to connect a beard to sexual innuendo you joker.

Hey, this is CEMB Forum. Everything gets connected to sexual innuendo.

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #21 - May 13, 2009, 09:41 PM

Good on you, Stardust!

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #22 - May 13, 2009, 10:05 PM

Quote from: Submissive Bob on May 13, 2009, 06:29 PM
Good going Stardust

I think the best way to loosen your parent's grip on you is to chip away at it bit by bit. Space out your battles so the defeats don't seem to pile up on them too much.
Eventually they will loose the will to resist and come to accept their loss of control.

You should have seen my Bangladeshi father-in-law. He was a completely broken man after my wife (then girlfriend) moved in with me (her idea, not mine). After that a marriage seemed the less scandalous thing for him to swallow.
He's recovered swimmingly however. We gave him some grandkids which he adores, and he's learned to use me as his IT guy, chaufer, tax consultant, financial advisor and general handyman.

So you became his bitch, in your search for acceptance

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #23 - May 14, 2009, 03:54 AM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 04:44 PM
I would just like to share with you that I have finally got rid of the scarf.

Congratulations!

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #24 - May 14, 2009, 03:55 AM

Congrats stardust!

What was the reaction of your friends, classmates/coworkers? Hope it goes good for you at home

Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 05:16 PM
Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 05:12 PM
Quote from: aliadiere on May 13, 2009, 04:54 PM

That's good and well done again! I've been trying to shave my beard for ages, but I still have a hairy face! I don't know why I can't do it!

Why is that? your family make you keep a beard? Hmm that must be harder, since a scarf you can take off and put on, a beard you shave off you cant really grow it back straight away. How about cutting it a little shorter? but noticible and see how they react.

No-one has ever made me keep a beard, it will just be a massive shock to everyone if i get rid of it now after years of having it! And I really can't be bothered with everyone asking me why I shaved it off, and telling me about what the punishment is for shaving!

I felt the same before I shaved (I let it grow back just cuz I like my face with some hair on it). I felt anxious that about what other muslims would say (I was known to be a pious salafi for a number of years). I shaved, didn't like it, but avoided that masjid for a while, then I went while they were making maghrib, and there was a mixed silence of their dhikr and shock that I shaved. Only one asked why, I said honestly "Cuz I wanted to see my face". And they said nothing after that. One of the more zealous that had looked up to me couldn't look me in the eye . Only a week or two later someone had the courage to whisper to me that it was a tragedy what I'd done to my 'beautiful beard'. Then when it got longer to where I wanted it they praised me again, "mashallah"

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #25 - May 14, 2009, 07:35 AM

Quote from: stardust on May 13, 2009, 04:44 PM
I would just like to share with you that I have finally got rid of the scarf.

Firstly I made it somewhat obvious that I was taking the scarf off after I left home, so my mum had a talk with me, but I didn't say anything. And then one day I just let it slip off my head with no care when I got in my car, the next day I didn't wear it and got out the house to my car, mum saw and said nothing. And only the other day I wore no scarf infront of my dad when leaving the house!!!

Wooooo!!!

what a shame! women are sexy in their scarves!!

...
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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #26 - May 14, 2009, 05:35 PM

Quote from: BerberElla on May 13, 2009, 05:27 PM
Lol the hairy kind.

I can't believe you just tried to connect a beard to sexual innuendo you joker.

I completely missed the double entendre until Berbs explained it. I am such an innocent this morning.

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Re: Finally! - No scarf!
Reply #27 - May 15, 2009, 06:37 PM

Congratulations, stardust! I bet you feel amazing. You have achieved much!

On to the beard, however... Do those who left Islam whilst having a beard feel like they have to shave it off? If so, why? I'd love to have a beard even now but it hasn't even started growing yet! :p

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