Funny Poem on Muhammad!

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Funny Poem on Muhammad!
OP - May 22, 2009, 04:39 PM

I found this funny poem on Mo, in Uzza's Quran Blogspot!

It seems just a little bit odd
that Mohammed said he saw God
it brought him good luck
all the girls he could fuck
so I guess that his plan wasn't flawed.

There was an old man named Mohammad
whatever you do makes him how mad
a cartoon you write
or a titty in sight
sets him off on the path of jihad.

Mohammed said he saw allah
and made himself into a mullah
He says he's the best
he'll kill all the rest
unless they all follow shariah.

This book is just making me bored
even though it's the word of the lord
it's so full of shit
it was wrote by a twit
and it's driving me out of my gourd.

In Mecca there was an old coot
whose preachings just wouldn't take root
they needed some urgin's
he promised them virgins
and soon he was rolling in loot.

The whole Middle East's in a fix
the Jews and the Muslims can't mix
each side thinks they're smart
with all of their heart
but they both cut the ends off their dicks.

World renowned historian Will Durant"...the Islamic conquest of India is probably the bloodiest story in history. It is a discouraging tale, for its evident moral is that civilization is a precious good, whose delicate complex order and freedom can at any moment be overthrown..."
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #1 - May 22, 2009, 05:53 PM

I am sure we could draw up a good filve liner too.. lets see

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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #2 - May 22, 2009, 05:58 PM

Quote from: IsLame on May 22, 2009, 05:53 PM
I am sure we could draw up a good filve liner too.. lets see

Why not start a contest?

We'll all post our Mopoems & there'll be a winner! I have a feeling Zaephon would win.

World renowned historian Will Durant"...the Islamic conquest of India is probably the bloodiest story in history. It is a discouraging tale, for its evident moral is that civilization is a precious good, whose delicate complex order and freedom can at any moment be overthrown..."
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #3 - May 22, 2009, 08:01 PM

I go first:

Once upon a time in the east
There was a man called Mo
Somtimes he was kind, and sometimes was a beast
His followers thay all believed, it was God that he saw
He grabed that aportunity, and thought it was a feast
If Homer Simpson saw him, he surely would have said DOHH!

...
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #4 - May 22, 2009, 08:49 PM

First five poems get put to a poll..

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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #5 - May 22, 2009, 08:59 PM

Please add the next line, poster after that does the next line, so on & so forth

There once was a man called Mo
...

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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #6 - May 22, 2009, 10:07 PM

Needs to be made snappier, but here's my crappy submission (harder than I thought)

There was once was a man called Mo
A 20ft beard, he managed to grow
Wishing for a girl in pampers
His hopes, even his dreams would not hamper
So Allah miraculously decreed his marriage to her one day
After with dolls she would play
All I know is I wanna grab that beard,
and get it sheared

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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #7 - May 23, 2009, 08:52 AM

Quote from: IsLame on May 22, 2009, 10:07 PM
Needs to be made snappier, but here's my crappy submission (harder than I thought)

There was once was a man called Mo
A 20ft beard, he managed to grow
Wishing for a girl in pampers
His hopes, even his dreams would not hamper
So Allah miraculously decreed his marriage to her one day
After with dolls she would play
All I know is I wanna grab that beard,
and get it sheared

Nice one!

Here's mine

There was once a man called Mo,

Whom I find as horried as the swine flu!

Poor li'l orphan called Mo of Arabia got bigger,

He worked for rivh o'le Khadija, wed her & became a gold digger!

He stopped all work now & wandered off to caves to chill!

Poor ole Khadija looked after the kids & paid the bill!

One fine day, he claimed that he saw God!

He told all, but they all claimed that he was a fraud!

On being ridiculed & rebuffed, Mo got verry angry!

Having few followers, he decided to but later avenge himself on all & sundry,

He & his merry men ran off to Medina,

There they established a caravan looting business & began to cause fitna!

Hoping to end this Mo menace the Jews & polytheists ganged up,

He told them to put up with jizya or he'll make them shut up!

World renowned historian Will Durant"...the Islamic conquest of India is probably the bloodiest story in history. It is a discouraging tale, for its evident moral is that civilization is a precious good, whose delicate complex order and freedom can at any moment be overthrown..."
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #8 - May 23, 2009, 10:37 AM

Quote from: IsLame on May 22, 2009, 05:53 PM
I am sure we could draw up a good filve liner too.. lets see

I bet lol seems that anyone could do a whole lot better than the poem in the OP, it was crap.

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #9 - May 23, 2009, 12:09 PM

(Update)
There was once was a man called Mo
A 20ft beard, he managed to grow
Wishing for a girl in pampers
His hopes, even his dreams would not hamper
So Allah miraculously decreed this marriage one day
After which, with dolls she would play
With this example we hope and pray
That one day all Muslims will stop growing their beards,
Using their bloodied swords instead, to get them sheared

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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #10 - May 24, 2009, 09:42 AM

Muhammad ibn Abdullah
was a very quite humble fella.

A businessman, he seemed smart and clean,
so they called him As-Sadeq and al-Ameen.

These things soon won over Khadija the lady
who was very rich but was also oh so lonely.

He went with caravans, from Yemen to Syria
and heard of tales that he knew he could make betta'

So one day he went in a cave, this Son of Abdullah
and came out claiming he was Chosen by the actual Allah.

Calling himself, the Messenger of Allah and the Holy Prophet
he was on his way to fame, power, controls rather than a timid profit

Khadija, Abu Bakr, Zayd joined, and so did little Ali
this scheme of things that would soon establish Arab hegemony

Years went by, rebukes flew around, tension in the air,
exile and expulsion would soon follow
but these Muslims, as they called themselves didnt care
because Yathrib became Madinah and violent things became
Till the last day, when no one dared called Islam simply 'hollow'

Jews were harmed, Madinah and Khaiber they called home
but they're only Jews, not spared even by people in Rome.

Mecca was conquered, and the Kaaba was made clean
saying Truth has Come, Falsehood will vanquish
but to the pagans who faced the sword and its scary gleam
it made them sad, angry, helpless and their hearts fill with anguish.

So all was done, a few years it took, to give supremacy to this Son of Abdullah
with 11 wives he bed, so many slaves, and blood shed...all in the name of Allah

Muhammad ibn Abdullah was a very quiet humble man.
Sadly, he only became a brute and bigot and bully
saying "Allah said so, because He can"

Pakistan Zindabad? ya Pakistan sey Zinda bhaag?

Long Live Pakistan? Or run with your lives from Pakistan?
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #11 - May 24, 2009, 01:41 PM

This is very funny!

There's RIBS' poem, my poem, Islame's poem & atheist.pk's poem. There should at least be one more peom, then we can put them to a poll!

Quote from: BerberElla on May 23, 2009, 10:37 AM

I bet lol seems that anyone could do a whole lot better than the poem in the OP, it was crap.

Why don't you try Berbs?

World renowned historian Will Durant"...the Islamic conquest of India is probably the bloodiest story in history. It is a discouraging tale, for its evident moral is that civilization is a precious good, whose delicate complex order and freedom can at any moment be overthrown..."
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Re: Funny Poem on Muhammad!
Reply #12 - June 14, 2009, 08:18 AM

Bunny Bump

Pakistan Zindabad? ya Pakistan sey Zinda bhaag?

Long Live Pakistan? Or run with your lives from Pakistan?
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