Well... it's getting harder to believe that it's a divine religion. I feel so duped
The image of God that I had was one I made. An all loving God, that's not really the image of God in the Quran. The image of heaven that I had is not really supported either, to be with friends and family, to be with loved ones, to know all the knowledge and all the hidden secrets of the world. That's not there either. Besides, the people I love and respect are going to hell simply because they are not Muslims, we're talking Carl Sagan, Albert Einstein, Shakespeare, Michael Jordan, Leonardo Da Vinci, J.K. Rowlings, Tupac (how are you gonna send Pac to hell? The dude kept asking ?Do G?s get to go to heaven?? answer: NOOOO). The Olsen twins. Mozart. Bruce Springsteen (Who in his right mind sends the Boss to hell? Seriously? THE BOSS?) Meanwhile the people I dislike will be in heaven, and some people I fucking hate will also be there; Saddam Hussein, Osama and his 4000 bandits. Plus another assortment of scum.
Not to mention all the violence in the world, all the poverty. How science has moved us up. How there is so much superstition in the religion. I ask myself, OK cut away all the superstition don?t believe in it, treat all people with respect, believe in all loving God, do what you want to do, treat women with respect, don?t lie, don?t steal, don?t murder. But then I?m not following the religion properly. The entire base of the religion is filled with superstition, and hate and bigotry and incorrect science.
I'm still reading, but I know one thing I have probably pretty much apostatised even though I tell myself I haven?t; 1. I drink and eat pork, smoke the weed and fuck the ladies (well.. getting there haha). Yes sir
2. I make religious jokes and criticize religion. 3. There is no way in hell that I will ever allow for religious dogma to take over my mind, because of the emotional hold on you, there is no rational hold, there is only fear and guilt.
But give it some time. I hate group-think, I don?t want to disjoin religion simply to be a part of CEMB or the like. I want to do whatever it is I want do simply because I think it?s the right thing to do.
Topic: What a great job Allah is doing