Skip navigation
Sidebar -

Advanced search options →
↑ ↓
CEMB → Forum → Life, The Universe & Everything → Religions and Gods → 70 Virgins and You

Welcome

Welcome to CEMB forum.
Please login or register. Did you miss your activation email?

Donations

Help keep the Forum going!
Click on Kitty to donate:

Kitty is lost

Recent Posts

Do humans have needed kno...
Yesterday at 03:33 PM
Qur'anic studies today
by zeca
May 19, 2025, 08:49 PM
الحبيب من يشبه اكثر؟؟؟
by akay
May 19, 2025, 12:00 PM
Marcion and the introduct...
by zeca
May 17, 2025, 09:44 PM
Lights on the way
by akay
May 17, 2025, 05:55 AM
Gaza assault
May 16, 2025, 04:36 AM
New Britain
May 13, 2025, 07:40 PM
Random Islamic History Po...
by zeca
May 10, 2025, 10:45 AM
What music are you listen...
by zeca
May 10, 2025, 08:24 AM
Pope Francis Signals Rema...
May 09, 2025, 05:32 PM
Kashmir endgame
April 24, 2025, 05:12 PM
عيد مبارك للجميع! ^_^
by akay
March 29, 2025, 01:09 PM

Theme Changer

 Topic: 70 Virgins and You

 (Read 10992 times)
  • 12 3 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • 70 Virgins and You
     OP - March 29, 2010, 12:15 PM
    Is it me, or does that just seem like too many virgins to anyone? What are we supposed to do with 70 virgins? And what if I don't want 70 virgins, nor even one virgin, I would want my wife if I had one.

    I'm not like Muhammad, I wasn't born to be a player, nor am a pedophile (and is probably why I am not virgin obsessed), so what do I care if she's even a virgin?"

    All I care about is finding one girl and making a life with her, though as a rule, she has to be my age or older.

    But what do you all think of that idea? Want 70 virgins? Think its too many? or what's your take?
    It is not the way you live your life that is important, it is how well you enjoy it that matters.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #1 - March 29, 2010, 12:19 PM
    I never got this Virgin obessions, but i understand that it is a culture thing about purity!

    well, if tehres a heaven, id prefer one flaming nympho!

    because, even now i sometimes need a break from my GF, how the hell am i supposed to handle 70, sexualy unexpirienced women?!
    "We are never deceived, we deceive ourselves." - from Goethes Faust
    "Only the wisest and the stupidest men never change." - Confuzios
    "there is no religion of peace, only people who are peaceful while being religious."
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #2 - March 29, 2010, 12:42 PM
    This whole 72 virgins thing has been slightly misinterpreted:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmN2cVOr5W4
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #3 - March 29, 2010, 12:51 PM
    Quote from: DigDeep on March 29, 2010, 12:19 PM
    but i understand that it is a culture thing about purity!


    Yeah. I think that's pretty much it. The whole concept is from that of medieval peoples, so when you think 72 virgins, you're thinking about your girlfriend or wife or whatever.. but back then this would have been basically saying that you'll get 72 pure and beautiful slaves to do you bidding. Its more about the feeling of eternal validation that you will get. It naturally appeals the most base and simplest males - the perfect soldiers and martyrs for the Islam meme.
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #4 - March 29, 2010, 01:34 PM
    Quote from: ninurta on March 29, 2010, 12:15 PM
    Is it me, or does that just seem like too many virgins to anyone?

    But what do you all think of that idea? Want 70 virgins? Think its too many? or what's your take?


    Well, Muhammad said that in heaven you'll have the 'strength' of one  hundred men, so I imagine you'd be able to handle 72 women.  grin12
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #5 - March 29, 2010, 02:01 PM
    Well don't worry about not having a wife in Islamic heaven. You get 2 wives (If you already have 4 you have to ditch a couple). The 72 virgins are not real people or the souls of real people. They are like magical sex slaves who live for cock. They are virgins whose hymens keep re-sealing. They will always be virgins and they will never want anything but you. They will have sex with you and then afterwards they will not expect to be cuddled or talked to (unless that is what you want). They are all very white. I guess the design team for Jannah thinks white is right. In fact their skin is even kinda translucent. Now this might seem very weird to people who aren’t turned on by looking at skeletons but I think there is some logic behind it. Have you ever heard someone say “That person is so white he is transparent”? This is based on a flawed understanding that white is the absence of colour, and translucency would be less colour. Well in fact white is the reflection to the eye of all the colours in the prism of colours. You can’t get whiter than white. If anything, true Black is the absence of colour. A black object absorbs all the coloured light rays from the sun and a white object reflects them all. This is why black is the hottest and most uncomfortable thing to where in the sun. So when clerics mandate that women wear black, it is serving the function of keeping them indoors more.

    Back to the wives. Every guy gets 2 wives. So logically there are twice as many women in Jannah than there are men. But remember that hell also has more women than men. Mathematically I’m not sure how this is going to work out. I guess you just have to have faith. The women will never get jealous of each other or the houris, Allah will relieve them of all their possessiveness while he indulges the possessiveness of men.

    Now you might think 72 virgins and 2 wives is a bit excessive. But remember, Jannah last for eternity. If you knew you would be having sex for 74 million-billion-trillion-zillion years and then some, would you want to do it all with one woman? Wouldn’t you want a little variety? Maybe change things up every million-billion-trillion-zillion years?
    My style is impetuous, my defense is impregnable and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat your children. Praise be to Allah." -- Mike Tyson
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #6 - March 29, 2010, 02:03 PM
    JOTM!!!!  dance
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #7 - March 29, 2010, 02:23 PM
    Quote from: Submissive Bob on March 29, 2010, 02:01 PM
    They will have sex with you and then afterwards they will not expect to be cuddled or talked to


    Ah, the perfect woman?

    *runs*
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #8 - March 29, 2010, 02:45 PM
    My idea of heaven is... one tall black girl that uses me as her magical-pale-virgin Grin
    Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #9 - March 29, 2010, 03:13 PM
    No thanks, funnily enough, 70 virgin women stripped of their emotions sounds a bit like hell to me. I like sex as much as everyone else but that's a few virgins too far.
    "The ideal tyranny is that which is ignorantly self-administered by its victims. The most perfect slaves are, therefore, those which blissfully and unawaredly enslave themselves."
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #10 - March 29, 2010, 03:47 PM
    i guess muhammmad was talking about 72, 9 Year olds since he is an expert on that
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #11 - March 29, 2010, 03:48 PM
    Quote from: _truth_ on March 29, 2010, 03:47 PM
    i guess muhammmad was talking about 72, 9 Year olds since he is an expert on that


     Cheesy
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #12 - March 29, 2010, 03:48 PM
    If i could have 70 of my boyfriend that would be lovely, <3, OMG i love him. Sorry stops getting mushy.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #13 - March 29, 2010, 03:56 PM
    You and your love have no place in our sex heaven
    So once again I'm left with the classic Irish man's dilemma, do I eat the potato or do I let it ferment so I can drink it later?
    My political philosophy below
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwGat4i8pJI&feature=g-vrec
    Just kidding, here are some true heros
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBTgvK6LQqA
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #14 - March 29, 2010, 03:59 PM
    Quote from: Lilyesque on March 29, 2010, 03:48 PM
    If i could have 70 of my boyfriend that would be lovely, <3, OMG i love him. Sorry stops getting mushy.

    maybe they would all have sex together and ignore you :\
    Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #15 - March 29, 2010, 04:03 PM
    Quote from: deusvult on March 29, 2010, 03:56 PM
    You and your love have no place in our sex heaven

     Nooooo fair, haha.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #16 - March 29, 2010, 04:03 PM
    Quote from: Tlaloc on March 29, 2010, 03:59 PM
    maybe they would all have sex together and ignore you :\

     Highly doubt it, he really is not obsessed with himself, he doesn't see why I am with him.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #17 - March 29, 2010, 04:04 PM
    Quote from: Lilyesque on March 29, 2010, 03:48 PM
    If i could have 70 of my boyfriend that would be lovely, <3, OMG i love him. Sorry stops getting mushy.


    He knows how to eat pussy real good, eh?
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #18 - March 29, 2010, 04:05 PM
    Iblis stop being cheeky. Hehe, I don't love him entirely for the physical benefits.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #19 - March 29, 2010, 04:05 PM
    Quote from: Tlaloc on March 29, 2010, 03:59 PM
    maybe they would all have sex together and ignore you :\

    kinky!
    ~My story~
    ~Collection of unethical hadiths/surahs~
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #20 - March 29, 2010, 04:07 PM
    omgod i so should not have said anything *facepalm*  banghead
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #21 - March 29, 2010, 04:09 PM
    Quote from: PeruvianSkies on March 29, 2010, 04:05 PM
    kinky!

    lolz Grin
    that's how my brain works ;(

    if i had 69 clones of myself i would experiment with multi-self-masturbation ^_^
    Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #22 - March 29, 2010, 04:10 PM
    Cheesy

    Imagine them all line up in a circle doing each other and being done by the person behind them at the same time... Tongue
    ~My story~
    ~Collection of unethical hadiths/surahs~
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #23 - March 29, 2010, 04:12 PM
    Quote from: PeruvianSkies on March 29, 2010, 04:10 PM
    Cheesy

    Imagine them all line up in a circle doing each other and being done by the person behind them at the same time... Tongue

    i imagined something like... multi-chained-circle-69 with 69 copies of myself Grin
    Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #24 - March 29, 2010, 04:12 PM
    numerology is our friend :S
    Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #25 - March 29, 2010, 04:12 PM
    70 clones of the same guy? It would be highly confusing. You'd whisper some sweet nothing in one of their ears and then the next time you'd have a 1 in 70 chance that is the guy who would remember it. The only point to this would be if you had some fantasy about being swept away by your lover and him taking you away to be alone somewhere by rowing a galley. Even if it is a gangbang fantasy, can any woman really take on more than 5 at a time?
    My style is impetuous, my defense is impregnable and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat your children. Praise be to Allah." -- Mike Tyson
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #26 - March 29, 2010, 04:13 PM
    I wonder if anyone has ever been really descriptive when asking what heaven is like.  For instance

    So I have 72 virgins when I get to heaven and they do anything I want?
    Yes.
    Like a 72 virgin jello fight in bikinis?
    Yes
    Or 36 of them in chocolate syrup and 36 of them in whip cream and we come together like a banana sundae?
    uhhhh.... yes
    Of say I wanted some of them to dress up like clowns because clowns really turn me on will they do that?
    uhhhhhhhhhhh.. I guess soo......
    ohh and what if I like having a ball put in my mouth and being dressed up in leather etc.

    I would love to see to see the look on the imams face Smiley

    So once again I'm left with the classic Irish man's dilemma, do I eat the potato or do I let it ferment so I can drink it later?
    My political philosophy below
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwGat4i8pJI&feature=g-vrec
    Just kidding, here are some true heros
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBTgvK6LQqA
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #27 - March 29, 2010, 04:13 PM
    Oh sweet doo jeez.  Afro Thankyou guys.
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #28 - March 29, 2010, 04:15 PM
    Quote
    70 clones of the same guy? It would be highly confusing. You'd whisper some sweet nothing in one of their ears and then the next time you'd have a 1 in 70 chance that is the guy who would remember it. The only point to this would be if you had some fantasy about being swept away by your lover and him taking you away to be alone somewhere by rowing a galley. Even if it is a gangbang fantasy, can any woman really take on more than 5 at a time?

    Just do chinese whispers, that'll solve the communication problem, and create another one no doubt! Tongue
    ~My story~
    ~Collection of unethical hadiths/surahs~
  • Re: 70 Virgins and You
     Reply #29 - March 29, 2010, 04:16 PM
    Quote from: deusvult on March 29, 2010, 04:13 PM
    I would love to see to see the look on the imams face Smiley

    He'll probably be wanking off tbh Tongue
    ~My story~
    ~Collection of unethical hadiths/surahs~
  • 12 3 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »