As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?

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- BerberElla
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As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
OP - June 09, 2011, 12:21 PM

Ok, bit dodgy putting the poll together so feel free to suggest improvements on how to word the choices, especially if you think you understand what it is I am trying to research about us exxies.

Like the 2 questions ask, what are your thoughts on death, both pre ex status and post ex status. Poll allows 2 votes.

The reason I ask is that I feared death both as a muslim and now as a non muslim I still fear death, albeit for different reasons.

As a muslim I believed I was going to hell. Not just for my numerous sins, but as I said elsewhere, because I was rotten on the inside. To me, my continuing inability to accept some core parts of Islam, made me feel there was something intrinsically wrong with me that meant I was of "those" who would end up in hell.

Infact heaven seemed like a joke to me, boring, I always asked "and then what" when being told of the glories of heaven. It wasn't enough for me. Plus, I wasn't raised in a desert. So why do I care about rivers, or rivers of honey?

So anyway, even as a muslim death brought me despair.

Now as an ex muslim I fear death, not because I fear hell. I don't believe in hell anymore, but because I simply do not wish to stop existing. Who I am becomes nothing, like the nothing that everyone becomes in the end. Lol considering how depressed I can get, and how often I wish my life would just end, in truth I do not wish my life would just end. But as an atheist, that is exactly what will happen. Just the end. No more me, no more jokes running in my brain, and laughter falling from my lips. No more thrills as I learn something new and exciting that makes life worth living. Just the end.

How about you?

Has your position changed?

Did you think you were destined for hell naturally?

Did the Islamic heaven appeal to you?

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #1 - June 09, 2011, 12:26 PM

Never been a theist, and have never feared death, nowt i can do about it so what's the point? I only fear the journey to death, i would prefer to die suddenly doing something I love than slowly over a long time period.
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #2 - June 09, 2011, 12:39 PM

As a muslim I thought I was going to heaven. Because I was told that no matter what sins a muslim commits, a muslim person will eventually (after being tortured a while for their sins), end up in heaven. Therefore I was 100% sure that I was going to heaven. And I looked forward to going to heaven, not because of the sexual orgies with the houris, but rather to have all the mysteries in the universe explained to me. Are there other intelligent beings beside humans? How does other solar systems and planets look like, up close? Who were my forefathers, how was their daily life? How was my father's youth? How will earth look like in 100, or even 1000 years? etc.

As an ex-muslim I of course have a different view on death. In my younger days, when I had no obligations in life, I did not fear death at all. In my somewhat older days, now that I do have obligations to others than myself, I obviously fear dying a premature death, as then I would not be able to carry out my obligations properly. Other than that, I really don't fear death. Of course I still want those questions answered.
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #3 - June 09, 2011, 12:47 PM

Always feared death, even been admitted to hospital on 2 occasions cause I thought I was dying, it was anxiety attacks. As a Muslim I feared death cause I want to live, don't think I ever thought of heaven, only hell and how I have a place earmarked for me there. I still fear death now because I wanna see my daughter grow and get married etc If there is a hell, I don't mind entertaining Shaytaan should be good fun, naturally I don't believe in hell anymore, have enough shit to deal with in my life to still worry about a fictional place. Chose the 2nd and third options, however I was afraid of death as a muslim, but it was not because of hell though cause I knew I was going to hell anyway
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #4 - June 09, 2011, 01:36 PM

I didn't fear death when i was muslim purely because i wanted to be with my ancestors i wanted to be with the people who were my blood and i was always interested in history. Being a muslim back then gave me that release that when i'd die i'd be united with my ancestors, so i always looked forward to it, sometimes more so when i was suicidally low and wanted to be with my dead family rather than the ones that were alive. I never thought too much about heaven or hell because i thought i'd go to hell for my sinful sins and thoughts yet i also believed i would ultimately go to heaven as i was a muslim. So yeah didn't bother me much.

Now as an atheist i don't know where my beliefs lie about death. I hate to think that when i'm dead that will be the end of me, everything i ever wanted, wished for, dreamt, achieved, lost, will go with me in my grave and decompose. I'd hate to imagine that death would be the death of my mind, i hate to think that i won't be able to think anymore. I love thinking and imagining and using my mind all the time
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #5 - June 09, 2011, 01:42 PM

You guys are masochists man lol "only going to hell for awhile"...............WTF?

A little while is thousands of years. Of torture aswell.

I don't like serious pain at all.

A thousands years of having my skin stripped off and replaced? LOL fuck that. I was afraid.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #6 - June 09, 2011, 01:57 PM

Well, perhaps I did not take that stuff too seriously even as a muslim. Perhaps I never really gave it too much thought, or I figured that since all muslims were eventually going to heaven, they would not be as severly punished as non-muslims. Then there was of course always the option of cleansing your sins by doing hajj, and staying on the right path from there on. Which was one of the main goals of my life as a muslim.

To be honest, I never REALLY feared hell, perhaps even as a muslim I could see through the bullshit factor of it?
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #7 - June 09, 2011, 02:25 PM

As a muzzie I was frighteningly certain I was going to heaven based on the fact that there are so few Muslims relative to the rest of the world. I had also fooled myself that most Christians and Jews would also be coming along for the ride.

As a kuffarite, I think I was initially very scared of death, and the fact that life just became this empty, cold, meaningless struggle for survival which just ended. But now I am much more at peace with death, I think accepting death is the hardest thing for an atheist to do, because we are compelled to understand and it is the one thing we will likely never understand. Being separated from my loved ones forever is painful, but as Mark Twain put it, we won't be alive to know the difference.

I would like to think that even though our consciousness fades, we will still be a part of this universe in one form or another.
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #8 - June 09, 2011, 02:43 PM

As a muslim, I feared hell.

As an ex-muslim, I do not want to die before making significant change in the world trashing islam to where it truly belongs.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #9 - June 09, 2011, 02:51 PM

When I was Muslim, I never really gave much thought to Heaven/Hell because I was simply one of those cultural types that equates Islam with Paki/Afghan/etc. social and familial tradition.
When I learnt about Allah's capacity for inventive sadism, I was one of those "only going to hell for a while!" people because quite frankly I knew full well that (at the time, I was twelve >.>) Green Day and My Chemical Romance meant more to me than Islam and eternal torture (fuck it, they still do) and I had weird thoughts about girls, but I was still a believer right...?
About a week later I apostasised.
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #10 - June 09, 2011, 03:35 PM

What a silly question. Why should i fear Hell? Hell is a nice village in Norway
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell,_Norway

As a Muslim: I didnt actually fear Hell
As a Former Muslim: I still dont fear Hell.

So no change there. Eh.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #11 - June 09, 2011, 03:44 PM

I feared death greatly, I was really unsure of where I'd be going when I died. I tried to practice Islam as best I could to 'increase my chances' of getting into heaven but I never really believed with certainty I'd go to hell or heaven. I used to graphically imagine how painful even a minute in hell would be, even though some people say Allah would rescue Muslims from hell after a while quite casually, I was still shit scared. I was intent of increasing my knowledge in Islam and really didn't want to die until I was very 'pious' as they say. The idea of heaven appealed to me greatly as long as my family were there with me, I used to wonder what would happen if they weren't there and be saddened by it. Heaven to me was a place where you'd never be bored and always be happy so it was obviously very appealing, also as I was a child I'd imagine doing all sorts of cool shit in heaven.

As an ex-Muslim I feel I understand life and death from a whole new perspective, I still try not to get so attached to the world as in the grand scheme of things our lives seem like a mere flash and that's why I'm intent on just enjoying the experience of life while it lasts, but always keeping in mind its just temporary and not meant to last forever. A bit like having no strings attached sex, enjoy the experience and when the time comes just move on without being saddened or filled with regret (Not that I've actually been in that situation )

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #12 - June 09, 2011, 04:57 PM

berbs..

Did you think you were destined for hell naturally?

It was always a fear that nagged at the back of my mind
As an xian, there were times I thought i had missed the
rapture. The panic was unfriggin believable!

Did the Islamic heaven appeal to you?

yeah. I have quite the imagination. the way it was explained
to me, it could be whatever I wanted it to be. And not being
married, I could exist without being a servant to some idiiot..
there were no horis or pearly boys in my jannah lol. It was similar
to the scene in the movie "contact"

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #13 - June 10, 2011, 08:27 AM

I was so afraid of Hell that the fear drove me to disprove Islam, as I saw it, it was the only way to save myself. Thank Allah Islam isn't true, eh?

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #14 - June 10, 2011, 09:21 AM

As a muslim I never really feared hell. Well, maybe a little bit. But since I hoped I wouldn't go there... and just didn't think about it enough... didn't care.
And figured I'd get forgiven for the sins I committed anyway.. through prayers or whatever...

But I did fear death, especially dying when I had yet to reach a certain level of faith that those good ol' muslims talked about. I was like, shit, it would suck to die right now because I haven't been all that pious of a person at all. I don't want to die tomorrow, ahhhhh! Maybe if I wear hijab that will be a good safeguard if I do die.
(thankfully I never wore hijab. I got to a point in my life where i was strongly contemplating wearing it though. for diff reasons.)

Now.... I just fear death because I don't want to die when I haven't done what I feel I should with my life... my own life, and what I can do for other people...

And sadly, I don't feel like I've reached that point yet. So it would really suck if I died any time soon.

I have a friend who died last year when he was hiking in New Hampshire.. he went off the trail to take a closer look at a waterfall and slipped on the rocks and fell to his death.

This friend was an amazing person. He had a beautiful spirit and was involved in so many charities and lived to love. He was so passionate about the things he loved and was so inspiring. The day he died, and many days after that, on his Facebook people constantly said that very thing - how inspiring he was and how he will continue to inspire them because that's just how strong his presence was in this life - it is too strong and unique to ignore.

He died doing what he loved (he was really into the outdoors, skydiving, etc) and was at a good point in his life before his death... that's how I would want to go out. It's weird because I guess that's how I've tried to make myself feel better about his passing. It sucks that he's gone but when I look at it from the perspective of just how genuinely good he was - and for that to be everyone's memory of you, that you're special and amazing and you've inspired so many people in your life (and he was only 25!) ... it made me feel a bit better through my time of coping. As opposed to someone dying because of a drug problem they had, or suicide, or anything like that. It's sad for those people... not to say that they won't be loved or the good memories of them forgotten. But, I would prefer to go out in a good way.

And when I looked at the pictures of the day of his death that his friends who were with him had posted... Wow. The mountains and trail are so beautiful - the view was amazing. And he looked so eerily peaceful and I guess it was just surreal for me to see those photos. He was happy.

Anyway.. another thing is, WTF, will I be buried muslim style and shit? My body facing towards mecca, said prayers on, and stuff? Um.... ugh. Something to think about guys! Write a will about how you want that handled.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #15 - June 10, 2011, 12:13 PM

Never feared death as a muslim. Was as good as I can be.

As a... whatever I am now... I fear death coz I want to make my mark on the world first.

One of the methods I plan to do this is having at least 3 kids and raise them to the best of my ability. Other methods include giving the message of the truth about Islam to the world hidden in works of literature same as Naguib Mahfouz did in his novel "Children of the Ally".

I'm open for debate (of why we should re-/embrace Islam), but I will no longer participate in this forum. Message me if you need anything. Good luck and may you all find your way... again...
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #16 - June 10, 2011, 12:30 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naguib_Mahfouz

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #17 - June 10, 2011, 01:29 PM

As a Muslim, I was afraid of death, not necessarily because of thinking about going to hell, but because of the uncertainty of whether I would, and whether I'd have my friends, etc with me where ever I ended up.
As a non-muslim, I'm not afraid of death, per se, but I'm scared of the effect of a premature death would have on my family, etc, and the fact that I wouldn't be able to see what they felt like, or feel sad myself.
Before, I'd fantasize I'd be looking out at the people in ghost form with a very solemn expression indeed
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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #18 - June 10, 2011, 01:42 PM

When i was a muslim, i always thought somehow,someway i will end up in heaven though the idea of hell scares me though.not only that the idea that most of my christian friends and family friends are going to hell simply because they dont accept islam makes me sad.

But as an ex-muslim, im not afraid of death,but i hope i will die peacefully as a contented self sufficient old man.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #19 - June 12, 2011, 04:13 PM

I cannot vote because I never was a Muslim. From the munute I lost Christian faith I also lost my fear of death. I only hope not to have to suffer long before it, but death is my ultimate destiny and it doesn't seem to be very difficult. Billions before me have already died.

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Re: As a muslim, how did you feel about death and the end goal?
Reply #20 - June 12, 2011, 09:59 PM

I knew i was going to hell. I sometimes thought it was for a short while, other times i'd admit it was for a very long time, maybe forever.
Then I'd go on thinking maybe Allah can see my humble intentions at the core and he'd destine me accordingly. My doubt on heaven or hell was the first realistic straw to take me away from religion. I remember i expressed it in an email to my sister who was away. The scariest thought was the grave. Which always seemed more highlighted since i knew the questions asked and the feel of the punishment. Burning in hell forever seemed like nothing i had imagined so it was always a passing and quick thought i preferred not getting a feel for it's experience. thinking Allah might have pitty on me.

I don't fear death. but i fear i will cause myself death and regret not taking care of myself, ending my life quicker than necessary. I want to die old and functioning.

"Tomorrow is the today you were worried about yesterday" Unknown
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