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 Topic: Why Women Still Can't Have It All

 (Read 4180 times)
  • 1« Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     OP - June 28, 2012, 11:06 AM
    I thought i should post this for discussion, its a long read but an interesting topic that is worth checking if you have the time to do so.

    link
    "I'm standing here like an asshole holding my Charles Dickens"

    "No theory,No ready made system,no book that has ever been written to save the world. i cleave to no system.."-Bakunin
  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #1 - June 28, 2012, 11:59 AM
    Right off the bat no one,leave alone women , can have it all !
    The main problem is people are reluctant to accept that compromises are inevitable  in real life as opposed to the 'reality' of their utopias.
    There's always a price to pay for the choices you make.


    The World is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
                                   Thomas Paine

    Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored !- Aldous Huxley
  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #2 - June 29, 2012, 12:54 AM
    Thanks for the link Cato, was a really good read (liked what she had to say), but the comments at the bottom did my head in lol.

  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #3 - June 29, 2012, 05:38 AM
    The article harps on expectations. Ones that mostly women, seem to have for themselves and others. It's not really the role of feminism to modulate women's ambitions and expectations though.

    Really the focus should be on choices. Their availability to all, and the removal of hindrance on women in making these choices. Once that sort of environment is established, then I think that reasonable expectations can follow.
    Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #4 - June 29, 2012, 06:03 AM
    Edit: Never mind, words didn't make sense.
    Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #5 - June 29, 2012, 11:04 AM
    Quote from: asbie on June 29, 2012, 05:38 AM
    The article harps on expectations. Ones that mostly women, seem to have for themselves and others. It's not really the role of feminism to modulate women's ambitions and expectations though.

    Really the focus should be on choices. Their availability to all, and the removal of hindrance on women in making these choices. Once that sort of environment is established, then I think that reasonable expectations can follow.


    Bingo! but unfortunately people's penchant for the extremes makes them go over board and the reasonable becomes unreasonable in everyone's views except theirs , leading to avoidable angst.

     Cheesy Cheesy Who elected feminists to be women's mouthpieces ?


    The World is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
                                   Thomas Paine

    Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored !- Aldous Huxley
  • Re: Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #6 - June 29, 2012, 08:57 PM
    The more I think about it, the less I can feel sympathy for a household with two six figure earners, "struggling" to raise a couple kids and provide them adequate familial support. Simply put, one or the other, or even both parents have to make sacrifices to the growth of their careers if they'd like to play a large role in raising their children. If they're unwilling to, then they can certainly afford to hire nannies.

    So, to put it shortly the answer to the question is no. No one can have everything, but everyone can have something depending on the choices you make and the values you have in your life.
    Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #7 - December 18, 2012, 03:45 AM
    Quote
    ...then they can certainly afford to hire nannies....


    yeah and then you end up with the stereotypical rich white family where the parents are too fckin busy with their lives and only have a "formal" relationship with their kids.

    " How was your day darling"

    " Oh it was lovely mother. And I trust your day went well."

    " So father how was your meeting with the executives"

    " It went fine Bejamin."

     vomit 

    Seriously if people can't/don't want to raise their children themselves they shouldn't be having any kids. Simple as that.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #8 - December 18, 2012, 04:23 AM
    Quote from: TheDarkRebel on December 18, 2012, 03:45 AM
    Seriously if people can't/don't want to raise their children themselves they shouldn't be having any kids. Simple as that.

    Are we talking raising them emotionally, financially, or both?
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #9 - December 18, 2012, 04:39 AM
    I read the article a few weeks ago; it was an interesting read and gave some insight into how difficult it can be to hold onto the ideal of "having it all". I don't think it's possible for anyone -- man or woman -- to "have it all" in any area of life but we can still do our best to make choices that are conducive to our optimum happiness and success...and take responsibilities for those choices and their consequences.

    Quote from: asbie on June 29, 2012, 05:38 AM
    Really the focus should be on choices. Their availability to all, and the removal of hindrance on women in making these choices. Once that sort of environment is established, then I think that reasonable expectations can follow.

    This x 100000. Once opportunity is available it's all on you to make the right choices for your situation.

    I'd like to add that just because the article's writer finds it difficult to maintain a balance, doesn't mean that the entire notion of motherhood + career is doomed. Everyone's reality is different.
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #10 - December 18, 2012, 05:11 AM
    Quote from: David on December 18, 2012, 04:23 AM
    Are we talking raising them emotionally, financially, or both?


    Both.
    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #11 - December 18, 2012, 05:03 PM
    Why is this article purely focused on women as it makes it seem that men can have 'it all'.

    If you're aiming for the top jobs (Ie Investment banking) where you can work upwards of 100 hours per week a man or a woman will not be able to have it all. I know many Investment bankers and they've told me how they barely get time to sleep some weeks!

    The author needs to wake up and smell reality, it isn't any different for men.
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #12 - December 18, 2012, 05:21 PM

    How many people are actually investment bankers? One of these most difficult and class conscious professions to enter even with an ivy league education.

    For me childcare is one of my primary concerns in going back to work. Quite frankly our societies put too much pressure on parents in raising their children and the buck far too often lies with the mother. At the same time we are judged for staying home and placeing ourselves in a vulnerable and dependent situation. 

    After having children of my own I believe that a parent should have a much more relaxed work schedule and more support like in gulf countries. I miss the days of arriving home a 2 just when the kids got back from school and having a nanny look after the youngest. Not alot of social pressure and things were just so much simpler.

  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #13 - December 19, 2012, 07:49 AM
    Quote from: TheDarkRebel on December 18, 2012, 03:45 AM
    Seriously if people can't/don't want to raise their children themselves they shouldn't be having any kids. Simple as that.


    Meh. I feel like in modern societies with public education and the like, that as long as you provide for the material needs and safety of children, they tend to pretty much raise themselves. Maybe not grow the way you as a parent would like them to grow, but grow up they will.

    Personally I find the opposite extreme where financial security is not assured to be more problematic.

    Seriously OT, but felt like throwing that out there.  Cheesy
    Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #14 - December 19, 2012, 07:55 AM
    Quote from: mujahid on December 18, 2012, 05:21 PM
    After having children of my own I believe that a parent should have a much more relaxed work schedule and more support like in gulf countries. I miss the days of arriving home a 2 just when the kids got back from school and having a nanny look after the youngest. Not alot of social pressure and things were just so much simpler.


    Do you think that this is really a plausible situation for most families, even ones with two or more parents?
    Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Why Women Still Can't Have It All
     Reply #15 - December 20, 2012, 05:36 PM
    Quote from: mujahid on December 18, 2012, 05:21 PM
    How many people are actually investment bankers? One of these most difficult and class conscious professions to enter even with an ivy league education.


    I don't think it's so class conscious as you make it out to be. Most of the time a lot comes down to networking and how many people you know within investment banking. If you have the right contacts you can probably walk right in without an education.

    However if you have done no networking at all but you can show great knowledge of investing and banking you can get in quite easily I'd say. The problem is that most who apply for investment banking do it purely because of the financial benefits.
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