Monogamish

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- TheDashingRabbit
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Monogamish
OP - March 03, 2014, 05:19 AM

So in this vid Dan Savage is promoting the concept of an open marriage of sorts because according to him Monogamy is designed to fail.

What are your thoughts on it ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxrF0vZrVXQ

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- TheDashingRabbit
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Reply #1 - March 03, 2014, 05:20 AM

And in this other vid he explains why monogamy is ridiculous.

Do you think he's right and that monogamy is an outdated concept that should go the way of the dinosaurs ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8SOQEitsJI

In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
- osmanthus
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Reply #2 - March 03, 2014, 06:14 AM

Different strokes. As long as everyone's happy, who cares?

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Reply #3 - March 03, 2014, 08:24 AM

Just some dude convincing himself that his particular preferences are the correct preferences that everyone else needs to adopt.

Too fucking busy, and vice versa.
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Reply #4 - March 03, 2014, 11:03 AM

Quote from: TheDarkRebel on March 03, 2014, 05:19 AM
So in this vid Dan Savage is promoting the concept of an ~~open marriage~~ of sorts because according to him Monogamy is designed to fail.

What are your thoughts on it ?

What is open marriage TDR? why even use the word "Marriage"??

Quote
Dan_Savage Daniel Keenan "Dan" Savage (born October 7, 1964)[2] is a gay American author, media pundit, journalist and newspaper editor.[3][4] Savage writes the internationally syndicated relationship and sex advice column Savage Love. In 2010, Savage and his husband Terry Miller began the It Gets Better Project to help prevent suicide among LGBT youth. He has also worked as a theater director, sometimes credited as Keenan Hollahan.

In his writing and public appearances, Savage has clashed with social conservatives on the right and the LGBT establishment on the left. He has been particularly vocal in response to Rick Santorum's views on homosexuality. He has made several controversial public statements in various media, often lambasting people with whom he disagrees.

that is from WIKI.......

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Reply #5 - March 03, 2014, 03:22 PM

I'm not really sure what the point is. Personally, I value loyalty more than anything else in a relationship. Loyalty incorporates both being faithful and truthful among other things. But that doesn't mean that I don't acknowledge the extremely hard task of keeping a relationship intact "til death do us part" or never ever slipping (from flirting, or even having sex with someone else). I'm not sure that is possible in most cases. I am not quite sure what their rules are in a "monogam-ish" relationship. But if my partner had a strong urge to be with someone else, or if that person had flirted with someone, I would rather have that person tell my straight up in my face and then maybe we could do something about it. To experiment sexually, or do things that are deemed "deviant" by traditionalists (whatever that is), or whatever, is much better from my perspective, than having a partner cheat on you without you knowing it.

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Reply #6 - March 03, 2014, 05:15 PM

One thing I don't like is how people are very critical of polyandry and polygyny. Isn't it the right of individuals to choose? Of course, in some religious societies, it seems kind of forced on people sometimes (and polyandry is disallowed which is unfair), but AFAIK, it is illegal in many countries to have more than one partner, and I do not understand that.
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Reply #7 - March 03, 2014, 08:39 PM

Sexuality and relationships are really diverse and one size cannot fit all. Each person has to decide for themselves what makes them comfortable and happy and how far they are willing to take things. Then find someone who has the same outlook as yourself. If both (or more) partners are honest and happy with whatever arrangement is mutually agreed on, then I don't think it matters what people do in their private life.
Even 'monogamy' has different definitions for different people like not flirting or watching porn etc, which can seriously impact a relationship if the other person's view of monogamy doesn't find those things as problematic. So don't assume things and make your stance clear very early on.
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