It really isn't that surprising. You spent years trying to get exactly that result. You didn't leave that part of you behind when you walked out the door.
And why shouldn´t you WISH that the man you loved and married had turned out like he ought to have? You DID love him, once - only, he turned out not to be deserving of your love and trust. No need to blame yourself, Berbs.
You know I hadn't really thought of it that way, I just feel ashamed to have those dreams after everything he did to me, but I guess it is all part and parcel of it so no more feeling shitty and ashamed. Thanks Guys

now I can explain that to my friend who has the same dreams about the man who abused her, both of us have just been ahsamed of it.
I think when we dream about "houses" or "rooms" we really dream about ourselves.
Might it be, you are dreaming about changing yourself around, your life?
Well I have been now that you come to mention it. But it would be a combination of that and the fact that the council have offered me a new home, so I was and am thinking about what it will be like when I finally get to go inside and take alook around. I have googled the street on the satellite google map thing and from a birds eye view it looks nice, but can't know til I get in. I'm not overly fussy, but I would like a more spacious kitchen, so that my fridge can fit in this time.