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 Topic: Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year

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  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #30 - February 17, 2013, 01:12 AM
    Quote from: TheDarkRebel on February 16, 2013, 09:06 PM
    ^

    Hassan. I'm pretty damn sure that ex muslims are in the millions .It's only a matter of us coming together, gathering courage and uniting against the islamic theocrats. 

    Once the number of ex muslims reaches a critical mass it won't take long for every ex muslim to start coming out of the closet.

    It's only a matter of getting the initial bunch of people to gather enough courage to stand up to their families and community.   

     after the critical mass is reached then we just gotta watch and enjoy.

     There will be so many people coming out as ex muslims left, right and centre that the the so called "ummah" will look around and not even know what hit them. 




    I agree. Like the Emperors New Clothes they just need to know they are not alone and there are others who also don't believe.

    Islam's greatest hold has never been an intellectual one, but emotional - things like community, family and fear.

    Having said that, emotional factors are arguably stronger.

    But, yes, if ppl knew we were here, they would have more courage to overcome them.
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #31 - February 17, 2013, 01:37 AM
    I read somewhere that Noam Chomsky didn't criticise Israel until his parents died because he didn't wanna hurt them or something?
    If that's true, it shows the lengths people will go to keep their parents happy.

    Tbh, I notice things that people say all the time, as if they are testing the waters. Probably not realising these are kinda atheistic thoughts Eg.

    Friend says "isn't the idea of a forever after life scary - who wants to live that long?" Me: hmmmm...
    Friend says: Why hasn't god stopped all the suffering? He can! Me: hmmm

    But the thing is, these are girls who pray every prayer on time...so I want them to come out to me, or keep expressing their doubtful thought and I just feed them back.

    There are definitely a lot of doubters but it's like they are kept on track by the apologists and moderates.
    Quote from: ZooBear 

    • Surah Al-Fil: In an epic game of Angry Birds, Allah uses birds (that drop pebbles) to destroy an army riding elephants whose intentions were to destroy the Kaaba. No one has beaten the high score.

  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #32 - February 17, 2013, 06:56 AM
    ^

    I think I can kind of sympathize with that.  I don't know if this sounds bad but I hope that my grandmother passes away before I come out as an apostate.

    She's really old and extremely emotional so I don't want to put her through mental torture with all the family drama that will occur after I come out.

    But other than that one exception I don't give a flying fuck about anyone else's opinions.  I will come out of the closet once I'm independent. 

    Theres gonna be harsh repercussion but I feel like I could take on my whole extended family in an argument.

    Even fight them off if I have to but there is no way I'm going to go on pretending to be a muslim any longer than necessary. 
    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #33 - February 19, 2013, 06:44 PM
    It depends a lot on how you feel about your parents and what kind of people they are; I've read the thing about Noam Chomsky too and tbh it makes perfect sense to me. I'm never coming out of the closet because I don't think the heartache it'll cause my parents is worth it.
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #34 - February 19, 2013, 07:00 PM
    Dark Rebel I can understand what you mean about your grandmother. My story is a bit different because when I was about to convert to Islam my grandmother who pretty much raised me said that if I become a muslim she would not consider me her grandson any more. I told her that was her choice and she would be walking away from me but I wouldnt be closing my door to her. It ended up being an empty threat on her part and she accepted it and we were pretty much the same with each other after I became a muslim. Could be that muslim grandmothers are a lot more hardcore though when it comes to religion but at the end of the day if we can I think we should strive to live life according to our own terms as grownups and not conform to other peoples beliefs through emotional blackmail and pressure. We as ex-muslims need to push back whenever we can or believers will do everything to suffocate us.
    -------------------
    Believe in yourself
    -------------------
    Strike me down and I'll just become another nail in your coffin
    -------------------
    There's such a thing as sheep in wolfs clothing... religious fanatics
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #35 - February 19, 2013, 08:06 PM
    Quote from: Al-Alethia on February 19, 2013, 06:44 PM
    It depends a lot on how you feel about your parents and what kind of people they are; I've read the thing about Noam Chomsky too and tbh it makes perfect sense to me. I'm never coming out of the closet because I don't think the heartache it'll cause my parents is worth it.


    The problem we face is that for most of us it's not like we can move out, get on with our lives and only do the islamic stuff when visiting family, while being "out" to friends and everyone else. The ex christian atheists take that for granted.

    If your a guy your parents expect to live with you for the rest of their lives and that means they know everything about your lifestyle. It's not something you can hide. 

    Plus whether your a guy or a girl when you finish uni and begin your career they get on your case about arranged marriage.


    So for the majority of us we cannot stay in the closet without severely compromising our entire lifestyles and living a complete lie. And I only have one life and there is no way I'm gonna waste it just to please some people.

    It's a hard fact but we gotta face huge emotional drama and overcome social pressures if we want to live a life that is true to ourselves.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #36 - February 20, 2013, 12:06 AM
    @darkrebel:

    Yeah. Its quite pathetic how parents want to keep a stranglehold on their kids until they decide it's time for marriage. And at the mere thought of a child wanting to move out, they go bonkers.

    A conversation I had a couple of months ago.

    Me: *Gives mum UCAS application*
    Mum: You didn't even tell me? You can't go to the ones outside of London.
    Me: I'll be fine on my own. What about Aisha and soon Ahmed who were both allowed to move out? (second cousins - not real names)
    Mum: They live in a small city and moved to London to study, so that makes sense. Besides they're both very trustworthy.
    Me: Roll Eyes (Yeah right, as if you'd let me move out if we lived in a "small city" And they're trustworthy? You don't have much of a high opinion of me do you?)
    Mum: *Starts rage mode* Your uncle went to a University close to home and listened to his parents. You're not going to run away.
    Me: Whoever mentioned running away? Moving out does not equal running away, only you would think something like that. Besides Uncle has had his own house for a long time.
    Mum: Of course, he's married. You can only get your own house once you get married!
    Me: Roll Eyes (Fuck marriage)
    Mum: You're going to a Uni in London!
    Me: ...
    Mum: *Zues mode* IF YOU RUN AWAY, YOU CAN STAY IN THAT CRAPPY FLAT OF YOURS, YOU WONT BE ALLOWED HERE AGAIN! finmad
    Me: Because you're crazy.
    Mum: Go and pray Isha salaah!

    Still going to move out. Tongue
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #37 - February 20, 2013, 12:15 AM
    I wanted to go to a good business school a bit far away and I would have gotten in with my marks but they didn't even let me apply.

      - Part of it was finances but alot if it was that they didn't want me moving out.

    Now I'm commuting to a uni that is closer. It's just as good a business school as the uni I wanted to go to but now I can't go to any parties because I don't live on Rez.

    sigh... guess no parties for me until i graduate and have a job.

    Well on the bright side at least i'll be independent by 22 and I can make up for my lack of uni partying by going clubbing almost every week for the rest of my twenties...

     


    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #38 - February 20, 2013, 12:19 AM
    That really does suck. I don't want to miss out on Uni life so I really want to move out.

    Just need to take that first step then the rest should be easy...
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #39 - February 20, 2013, 12:27 AM
    TDR, something about that story is so sad, like watching your life slip by because you were too passive. How do you know something wont come up after you finish school and you'll listen to your parents again?
    Quote from: ZooBear 

    • Surah Al-Fil: In an epic game of Angry Birds, Allah uses birds (that drop pebbles) to destroy an army riding elephants whose intentions were to destroy the Kaaba. No one has beaten the high score.

  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #40 - February 20, 2013, 02:22 AM
    Quote
    TDR, something about that story is so sad, like watching your life slip by because you were too passive. How do you know something wont come up after you finish school and you'll listen to your parents again?


    I'm not watching it slip by.  I am talking to and meeting more new people than I ever have in my life. I am more confident and my life is getting alot better than it used to be. I was miserable during highschool but now I'm alot happier in general nowadays.


    Plus I'm also looking at the positive. The uni I go to now is in the downtown of the biggest and busiest city in the country so I'm still having fun. And it's really good as far as business schools go so I'm happy.


    And the reason I have to listen to my parents is because I am dependent on them to pay for my tuition and books and stuff.

    As soon as I'm financially independent I will tell them my beliefs and live life the way I want to live it.

    It does get frustrating sometimes but sometimes we have to be patient and think clearly and plan instead of making rash and quick decisions.



    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #41 - February 25, 2013, 06:24 AM
    Why would a guy have to live with his parents forever? wacko I always thought there was more pressure on girls to stay home until they were married; didn't think anyone had to stay FOREVER, only until they found a new cage. 

    Anyway, I've hinted at moving out when I start my career and my mum said that was "running away" and "ditching the family"; she said "you can only move out when you're married!" and I'm like "but I don't think I'll ever get married so what am I gonna live at home until I'm 40 or something?" And she responded with "A's (unmarried) daughters are in their 30s and own homes but they still live with their parents". 

    She basically said I would no longer be part of the family if I did that; she knows I'm depressed and cares about my happiness so I reckon I *might* be able to convince her that moving out is conducive to my happiness and mental health. *Sigh* We'll just have to cross that bridge when we get to it. 
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #42 - February 25, 2013, 09:16 AM
    Alethia I would tell you to move out when you get your studies done.   I made the mistake of staying on because of guilt, but I am moving out in a few months.  

    I think especially with Somali parents kids are looked at as a 401k or retirement plan.  Hence, all the guilt for wanting to leave.   They think that you will not be there for them.   I have already told my parents I will be there for them, however, I will not be living at home.  They also use the fact that no other Somali girl has done this, at least that they know of.   Basically saying that you will make me look bad in front of family and friends.

    I think all that you will not be apart of the family bit is to scare you really, making you think that if you step out into the world that you will go empty handed and alone.  But the world isn't such a bad place.   Again guilt and fear can only work for so long.  Been there done that don't wasted a good portion of my early years walal take if from me, pack your shyt and live your life, be there for them when they really need it, but also live your own life.

    I remember asking my mother once if she really wanted to keep this up, and she asked what and I said waiting for you all to die so I can live.     I told her that it wasn't a pleasant thought but all the guilt she was putting on me every time I put the idea of moving out forward was going to lead to resentment.   I don't know if it sunk in but she seems to be coming around on the idea.

    But then again my mother is like mitt Romney flip floppin on every damn thing so she could just go exorcist on me in a min. shrugs

    Oh my Christopher Hitchens its a fihrrrrrrrrrrrr
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #43 - February 25, 2013, 09:32 AM
    Also as a reply to the bbc show make me a muslim wtf, and ugh wtf again!  Seriously I only watched the first episode and I was like are these women for real?

    Like one poster said how come you don't have shows about muslim apostates, even if you want to keep your identity a secret they can block out your face.  The bbc or any network should be doing a show on ex muslims and real expose style stuff into the muslim world.  Get inside madrassas etc   

    I am sorry I just got into an argument with a muslim at work who found out I was a murtad and I am still fuming. rant over
    Oh my Christopher Hitchens its a fihrrrrrrrrrrrr
  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #44 - February 25, 2013, 10:12 AM
    ^Thanks for the advice abayo. I’m definitely not going to be staying at home any longer than I absolutely need to but I’m just going to have to work out a way to make me parents accept it. I also told my mum that I’ll be there for her, and I truly will; she’s not perfect (far from it tbh) but I love her and I’d even be open to her coming and living with me waay into the future when she’s old and needs help, it’s just that I want to be independent and don’t want to live under my parents’ roof for the rest of their lives.

  • Meet four of the Brits who become Ex-Muslims each year
     Reply #45 - March 01, 2013, 06:41 PM
    Quote from: TheDarkRebel on February 16, 2013, 09:06 PM
    ^

    Hassan. I'm pretty damn sure that ex muslims are in the millions .It's only a matter of us coming together, gathering courage and uniting against the islamic theocrats. 

    Once the number of ex muslims reaches a critical mass it won't take long for every ex muslim to start coming out of the closet.

    It's only a matter of getting the initial bunch of people to gather enough courage to stand up to their families and community.   

     after the critical mass is reached then we just gotta watch and enjoy.

     There will be so many people coming out as ex muslims left, right and centre that the the so called "ummah" will look around and not even know what hit them. 




    Which is why we should fucking meet asap.
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