lol a couple of lame jokes of mine

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Topic: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine

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- Logical_Mind44
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lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
OP - September 07, 2010, 05:19 PM

When a muslim cries out in agony, he says "Ya Allah!" or "oh my God!"

When a Hindu cries out in agony, he says "Oh my Brahma, Ganesha, Indra, Uma Maheshwari, Shiva... and to the rest of you that I have missed out please pardon me" or "oh my Gods and Goddesses!"

Two atheists meet for the first time. They start to have a conversation eventually the topic of atheism props up and one of them says "I used to be a muslim all my life, my family members are muslim, and after a certain age I started to lose my belief in God. The initial stages of de-conversion process was very hard to cope with". The other one says "well atleast you were a muslim. You have one God, one headache. I used to be a Hindu, many Gods all the more headache."

When a muslim jihadist encounters a hindu and forces to convert him. He says "abandon your false Gods and accept Allah the one and only true God!", to which the Hindu replies "you have only one God, I have an entire arsenal of them, more power to me."
- TheRationalizer
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #1 - September 07, 2010, 05:20 PM

When an atheist has sex they say "Oh nothing, oh nothing"

I don't come here any more due to unfair moderation.
http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?topic=30785
- BerberElla
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #2 - September 07, 2010, 05:21 PM

Quote from: TheRationalizer on September 07, 2010, 05:20 PM
When an atheist has sex they say "Oh nothing, oh nothing"

But seriously logical mind, that one WAS lame.

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
- Aziz
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #3 - September 07, 2010, 05:23 PM

When God has sex he says "Oh Jesus! Oh Jesus!"

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- DigDeep
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #4 - September 07, 2010, 06:20 PM

Quote
When God has sex he says "Oh Jesus! Oh Jesus!"

So, amm... let the incest jokes begin!

"We are never deceived, we deceive ourselves." - from Goethes Faust
"Only the wisest and the stupidest men never change." - Confuzios
"there is no religion of peace, only people who are peaceful while being religious."
- mufa9a
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #5 - September 07, 2010, 06:38 PM

why was the muslim man staring at himself naked infront of the mirror?

*rehearsing for yoom al Qiyama

what do you get when you mix dyslexia , Insomnia and atheism?

* a man staying up all night wondering if there is a Dog .

"Tomorrow is the today you were worried about yesterday" Unknown
- GodIsNotGreat
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #6 - September 07, 2010, 06:46 PM

Quote
what do you get when you mix dyslexia , amnesia and atheism?

* a man staying up all night wondering if there is a Dog .

19:46 <zizo>: hugs could pimp u into sex

Quote from: yeezevee
well I am neither ex-Muslim nor absolute 100% Non-Muslim.. I am fucking Zebra
- BerberElla
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #7 - September 07, 2010, 06:55 PM

Quote from: mufa9a on September 07, 2010, 06:38 PM
why was the muslim man staring at himself naked infront of the mirror?

*rehearsing for yoom al Qiyama

what do you get when you mix dyslexia , amnesia and atheism?

* a man staying up all night wondering if there is a Dog .

Hmmm, would it work better if it was dyslexia, insomnia and atheism?

I mean, why the amnesia?

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
- Aziz
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #8 - September 07, 2010, 07:03 PM

He forgets to take the sleeping pills?

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- mufa9a
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #9 - September 07, 2010, 08:01 PM

sorry my bad , i DID mean Insomnia !!

i'll modify that post .

"Tomorrow is the today you were worried about yesterday" Unknown
- mufa9a
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #10 - September 07, 2010, 08:03 PM

Quote from: Aziz on September 07, 2010, 07:03 PM
He forgets to take the sleeping pills?

that would've worked too !

"Tomorrow is the today you were worried about yesterday" Unknown
- mighty_cats
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #11 - September 07, 2010, 08:20 PM
- Maya
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #12 - September 07, 2010, 10:43 PM

"The greatest general is not the one who can take the most cities or spill the most blood. The greatest general is the one who can take Heaven and Earth without waging the battle." ~ Sun Tzu
- Absurdist
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #13 - September 07, 2010, 10:45 PM

What do Iran and the Netherlands have in common?

You can get stoned in both countries.
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #14 - September 07, 2010, 11:38 PM

LOL good one.
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #15 - October 23, 2010, 01:26 AM

I'll hump delillah. Rub all of me on her I mean.

[Alhamdulillah, Rab ul Al-Ameen]

laaa leee laaa laaa leee laaa laaa, wow Muhammad done wrestle with poo Allah.

[la ilaha ill-Allah, wa-Muhammadan Rasool-ul-Allah]

Hi, I like salad. Hi, I like fillet.

[Hayy'a alas Salat, Hayy'a alal Falah]

I sell lamb, oooh I like cum.

[Asalamu Alaykum]
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #16 - October 23, 2010, 01:34 AM

S-L-M ooh S-L-M ooh S-L-M ooh S-L-M

we offer salam

so the religion is called Islam

and we are Muslim

S-L-M ooh S-L-M

piss for piss for piss for piss for piss

S-L-My/slimey bastards the lot of us, arent we?
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #17 - October 23, 2010, 01:42 AM

My immodest, indecent, improper, infidel nine year old daughter was playing in her yard

The Muslim men are going "Muhammad can we please bang her hard?!"
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #18 - October 23, 2010, 02:02 AM

Now lets fuck Hinduism. The religion I was born into.

The worst of all religions imo.

Hmmm which one of their deities to play with?

Son of a bitch! Theres just so many of them! So many deities loool. What a fucking retarded religion.

Okay...

what caption to put?

Husbands, dont fuck with your wives.

or

Kali Ma! Wheres your bra?!

why is Shiva lying on the ground as though he is dead? lulz
- Logical_Mind44
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Re: lol a couple of lame jokes of mine
Reply #19 - October 23, 2010, 02:04 AM

Monotheism and cosmology according to Hinduism

God is a handsome bastard issuing an infinite number of universes from himself, he relaxes himself with his Infinitely large awesome cock being sucked off by nymphos
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