I'm a self-hating desi.
I hate everything south asian. I hate some south asian cultures more than others.. for examples pakistani/punjabis i tend to loathe more than any others... but I hate Bengalis almost as much. Only desis I like are west indians, ones from Trinidad and such. The rest drive me batshit.
Not even kidding, I have serious problems with this in my life, I have to hold myself back. Whenver I deal with a desi at work I always make assumptions and judgements, its bad. A lot of my white friends are taken aback by how racist I am to the point where they are often defending desis against my discrimination.
And I know I'm not the only one. There are other self-hating desis who also do the same when they see me and assume I'm a cultural 'desi' too and we end up hating each other even more. Vicious cycle.
Canada is one fucked up place..
I feel ya.
Although I don't consider myself desi, I have spent most of my life surrounded by them. And it wasn't a matter of 'oh you get idiots of every race'. It was literally, or almost anyway, that everyone was a brain-dead, misogynistic, homophobic, racist, conforming, uncultivated, ignorant fuckwit. Every guy would wake up every day, empty a bottle of gel on his head, put on his tracksuit, his white airmax 95s, his knockoff bling, turn-up at the job centre to sign for his 'job seekers' allowance, then get in a kitted-up, huge-ass-spoiler-and-all, stolen corsa c with his 'boy' who's wearing the same tracksuit he is like there was a buy-1-get-1-free sale at chavs'r'us, with the same short-back-and-sides haircut from the same barber, with the same mc chippy track on repeat blaring through the sub-woofer while they're 'cruising' around horning at white girls, thinking they're the shit 'cos they've seen too many bollywood movies. God forbid if you have to ever ride with them, and being subject to 'conversations' - and I make no apologies for being a snob here - fuck me, they're so stupid it's unreal.
But then I moved out and out of all the different races I've interacted with here, as far as you can draw generalisations, the Indians have been considerably the most intelligent, curious, interesting and fun of the lot. And I'm shocked every time. I realise now that it was a place of general poverty and the non-desis weren't much better, but I still can't shake off the wariness and negative expectations. So yeah, I'm probably racist. But so would you be if you grew up where I did.
Topic: Are you racist?