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Theme Changer

 Topic: The Anti-Houri Club

 (Read 16704 times)
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  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #90 - September 19, 2011, 11:37 AM

    Quote
    But I love your wits and the "Sit on it." logic and hence the worship.


     Grin

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #91 - September 19, 2011, 11:40 AM

    OK, I am becoming quite a laughing stock for my sarcastic  worship. So, for a while, lipsrsealed.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #92 - September 19, 2011, 11:43 AM

    Rubaya, I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing with you  Smiley

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #93 - September 19, 2011, 12:23 PM

    ^ +1

    oz.... omg....  Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #94 - September 19, 2011, 06:40 PM

    So let's break this down, you're saying:

    Black men tend to have large cocks
    Black men tend to be large
    Ergo, large men tend to have large cocks?


    I've googled this topic and I'm wrong- penis size is not related to size of the male. What was the point I was trying to make?
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #95 - September 19, 2011, 07:18 PM

    Actually, I am really that poor at English. I didn't understand muff dive and what he could do with the clitoris thing. But I was too embarassed to ask. But I love your wits and the "Sit on it." logic and hence the worship.

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=muff%20dive

    19:46   <zizo>: hugs could pimp u into sex

    Quote from: yeezevee
    well I am neither ex-Muslim nor absolute 100% Non-Muslim.. I am fucking Zebra

  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #96 - September 19, 2011, 08:23 PM

    At that age, I was still trying to figure out what the fuck was so sexy about women so pale that you could see their bone marrow.

    But fantasizing about it anyway.

    I may be wrong. But I read somewhere that the complete anatomy of a houri is completely revealed - the complete digestive system including her intestines, the colone, even her rectum, the uterus, fallopian tubes, the inside of her genitals, the heart and lungs, the brain etc. Correct me if I am wrong.

    Anyway, This is a complete turn off.

    वासुदैव कुटुम्बकम्
    Entire World is One Family
    سارا سنسار ايک پريوار ہے
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #97 - September 19, 2011, 08:28 PM

    Hey do these things all look the same? I mean if everyone gets 72 of them and they all look the same, how would you know which one you were screwing?

    There is endless supply of wine in heaven. After wine being poured into you by houris, it does not really matter.

    वासुदैव कुटुम्बकम्
    Entire World is One Family
    سارا سنسار ايک پريوار ہے
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #98 - September 19, 2011, 08:29 PM

    I guess you dont know the rule 34 of the internet!

    Little Fly, Thy summer's play
    My thoughtless hand has brushed away.

    I too dance and drink, and sing,
    Till some blind hand shall brush my wing.

    Therefore I am a happy fly,
    If I live or if I die.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #99 - September 19, 2011, 10:19 PM

    There is endless supply of wine in heaven. After wine being poured into you by houris, it does not really matter.


    but i heard its wine that doesnt get you drunk  Cheesy

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #100 - September 19, 2011, 10:26 PM

    I want to be on the council for this club. Swear 'fo god, man, if I ever meet one of those transparent, big-breasted, cow-eyed virgins, I'll beat her face in with a fucking crowbar. And then? Then I'm going for the big man himself.  Angry

    "I know where I'm going and I know the truth, and I don't have to be what you want me to be. I'm free to be what I want."
    Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #101 - September 19, 2011, 10:59 PM

    Grin Grin Grin

    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #102 - September 19, 2011, 11:09 PM

    I want to be on the council for this club. Swear 'fo god, man, if I ever meet one of those transparent, big-breasted, cow-eyed virgins, I'll beat her face in with a fucking crowbar. And then? Then I'm going for the big man himself.  Angry


    I love your siggy!   001_wub

    i wanna be on that council, too.  I will bring a serious "Louisville
    Slugger" baseball bat   yes



    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #103 - September 20, 2011, 12:22 AM

    Fuck yeah, the wannabe thug and djinni queen running around jannah busting caps in various asses.

    "I know where I'm going and I know the truth, and I don't have to be what you want me to be. I'm free to be what I want."
    Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #104 - September 20, 2011, 04:52 PM

    Don't forget me! I wanna join in too! :3
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #105 - September 25, 2011, 07:11 AM

    what I found most offensive is how the heavenly ladies are described: no more menses, no more pregnancy... all the impurities of earthly women gone... I beg your pardon??? Islamic paradise is literally 100% invented by guys, and disrespectful ones too! I can't believe I fell for this shit and accepted it for so long...
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #106 - September 25, 2011, 07:16 AM

    It couldnt  be anything else ...

    Little Fly, Thy summer's play
    My thoughtless hand has brushed away.

    I too dance and drink, and sing,
    Till some blind hand shall brush my wing.

    Therefore I am a happy fly,
    If I live or if I die.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #107 - September 25, 2011, 07:40 AM

    Haha I doubt a female designed heaven would be any less offensive to men- the men would all be 6feet tall, with big cocks, no premature ejaculation! Perfect timing, tanned, toned, gorgeous, knows exactly what we want/what we're thinking at all times and responds accordingly, thinks you're perfect and better than every other woman in the universe, etc.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #108 - September 25, 2011, 07:42 AM

    No, you have it wrong. They wouldn't be like that at all. They'd be transparent virgins with zero experience, and every time you fucked one of them he'd go straight back to having zero experience again. Grin

    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #109 - September 25, 2011, 07:54 AM

    Damn, the premature ejaculation must get old after a while.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #110 - September 25, 2011, 09:09 AM

    Haha I doubt a female designed heaven would be any less offensive to men- the men would all be 6feet tall, with big cocks, no premature ejaculation! Perfect timing, tanned, toned, gorgeous, knows exactly what we want/what we're thinking at all times and responds accordingly, thinks you're perfect and better than every other woman in the universe, etc.


    If women designed it it would rivers flowing with chocolate and harrods harrods all the way .... Wink

    Little Fly, Thy summer's play
    My thoughtless hand has brushed away.

    I too dance and drink, and sing,
    Till some blind hand shall brush my wing.

    Therefore I am a happy fly,
    If I live or if I die.
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #111 - September 25, 2011, 10:06 AM

    I want to be on the council for this club. Swear 'fo god, man, if I ever meet one of those transparent, big-breasted, cow-eyed virgins, I'll beat her face in with a fucking crowbar. And then? Then I'm going for the big man himself.  Angry

    Jealousy... Jealousy... Jealousy   everywhere for Allah rule following pious Muslims.  You guys are  Jealous of Muslim guys and girl going for that Jannah.  Go to hell   finmad  finmad   YOU ALL CEMB folks with your small breast   small dicks and rat eyed no good folks hate that Allah heaven so much, the hate for  allah/god that you see in Quran/hadith sunnah spill out from you without you knowing it..   Yes that Premature ejaculation spills out your brains without knowing it..  finmad finmad  

    Do not let silence become your legacy.. Question everything   
    I renounced my faith to become a kafir, 
    the beloved betrayed me and turned in to  a Muslim
     
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #112 - September 25, 2011, 10:11 AM

    Oh, Yeeze. <3
    (I'm just going to start calling you Yeezy now, okay? Okay.)

    "I know where I'm going and I know the truth, and I don't have to be what you want me to be. I'm free to be what I want."
    Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #113 - September 25, 2011, 10:56 AM

    what I found most offensive is how the heavenly ladies are described: no more menses, no more pregnancy... all the impurities of earthly women gone... I beg your pardon??? Islamic paradise is literally 100% invented by guys, and disrespectful ones too! I can't believe I fell for this shit and accepted it for so long...


    Act in haste repent at leisure!
    Amazing isn't it? If you tell this to a wannabe she will pooh-pooh whatever you have said even if she knows that you have been through it all and call you a Islam hater/Islamophobe ......



    The World is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
                                   Thomas Paine

    Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored !- Aldous Huxley
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #114 - September 25, 2011, 11:00 AM

    Premature ejaculation of the truth is not a bad thing at all and should be actively encouraged! Tongue



    The World is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
                                   Thomas Paine

    Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored !- Aldous Huxley
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #115 - September 25, 2011, 01:35 PM

    Sunbul!  Of course! that goes without saying!  Thug Wannabe, Djinni Queen and
    TANK GIRL! lol  They wont know what hit em  hehe

    what I found most offensive is how the heavenly ladies are described: no more menses, no more pregnancy... all the impurities of earthly women gone... I beg your pardon??? Islamic paradise is literally 100% invented by guys, and disrespectful ones too! I can't believe I fell for this shit and accepted it for so long...


    So if theres no more being preggersor menses, whats the point of having sex?
    Obviously no one pointed out to these guys that the whole purpose of sexual acts are for
    procreation.  Other than the fact that it feels good.  So then there should be no "water"
    coming out of a man's penis, so how would SHE be polluted by having more than one man?

    I asked one muslim what his idea was of Jannah, and he said,
    "eternal orgasm!"  I replied, "Is that ALL you want from paradise?"
    He said, "No, the wine sounds good too".

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #116 - September 25, 2011, 01:51 PM

    But seriously houris sound like they must be epic in bed. imagine this, have you ever falling in love with a woman? Imagine falling in love a 1000% more passionately, and this passion perpetually increasing every time you gaze upon this houri? It is undeniably a powerful concept.

    I posted about this in another thread:
    Quote
    To be frank, I understand his concept behind decaying human whore. He is just referring to human mortality here, and the whore part is just a symbolic description of the human carnal desire. The houris in heaven will be ageless and genderless, and will have perpetual beauty. In the sense that, when you look at the houri and you look away and then look at her once more your desire/attraction for her will increase by 80% each time you look at her and then look away and look at her once more.

    This is actually ingenious with respect to the idea of immorality and boredom quite often in some philosophical debates it is argued that mortality is better then immortality since immortality would quickly become boring and eventually repetitive, since every possible action event and reaction would take place the mind/soul would eventually become 'tired' of this. So the idea of perpetual increasing of desire removes this paradox.

    The idea of perpetual attractiveness/desire is not stagnant to houris alone, it also applies to food and wine in heaven with regards to Islamic theology in Islamic theology the idea of boredom with respect to immortality is removed with the introduction of this ingenious of idea of everything always increasing becoming better infinitely. For example each successive bite of an apply will always increase in taste by 80% from the previous bite.

    This is pretty powerful stuff since it appeals to the most base human desires. We might laugh at these guys but trust me this stuff is very powerful and a raw appeal to human emotion and a dangling of a carrot approach to winning converts and increasing the faith, of the 'faithful' many men would fall for this.

    Often times in Islamic theology we see the stick method as opposed to the carrot method in winning converts and increasing the faith of those who already follow Islam. It's essentially a dualistic appeal to human weakness.

    The parallel I can draw here is a desperate human dying from terminal cancer being told there is a new unique cure for his illness which involves something stupid and untested. However the human in his desperation clutches onto this idea faithfully (in many cases) since he does not have anything to lose, and everything to gain, this in essence this goes all the way back to Blaise Pascal, who said something to the extent the argument that it is in one's rational self-interest to act as if God exists, since the infinite punishments of hell, provided they have a positive probability, however small, outweigh any countervailing advantage. So the houri description is just slightly tweaked to essentially to Pascals Wager. Akin to a person with terminal cancer falling for any pseudo-cancer cures from prayer to homeopathy. Eventually leading to the idea of it being an intrinsic desire for humans wanting to be immortal, and have godlike attributes.

    The irony here at least is that women like Saffire, Ishina, Aphrodite, Stardust to some extent even Ferraro aspire to be like those described houris in their subconscious minds, just take a look at women's magazines, and many men are no different many of them want to take on the attributes of God, they want to be just like God.



    http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?PHPSESSID=5e891472dc53639428716dacc52154f7&topic=17237.msg489683#msg489683
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #117 - September 25, 2011, 02:15 PM

    KT... okay, but this thread is about the ANTI HORIS CLUB!   Cheesy

    the ones who got the short end of the stick, the women! LOL

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #118 - September 25, 2011, 02:58 PM

    That's your view!  Tongue Muslim women are not like other women,they gladly do whatever they have to do for Allah's sake! No earthly pleasures for them!



    The World is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.
                                   Thomas Paine

    Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored !- Aldous Huxley
  • Re: The Anti-Houri Club
     Reply #119 - September 25, 2011, 03:22 PM

    so damned heavenly high they aint no earthly good.

    been there, done that.   Cry

    When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
    Helen Keller
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