Clothing issues after leaving?

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- shnx045
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Clothing issues after leaving?
OP - February 23, 2013, 08:23 PM

Hi all

Today I went to a restaurant with a group of friends..was going to take off my coat when we were seated, but my friend was like ''don't take it off, you'll be showing too much skin'' (was wearing a t-shirt) - so I ended up keeping it on for the whole meal

I was wondering if anyone else feels insecure when going out wearing things like vest tops, leggings, tight clothes etc? The whole ''dressed but naked'' thing..
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Clothing issues after leaving?
Reply #1 - February 23, 2013, 08:44 PM

I still feel weird...because I wear the hijab around the people that are muslims. And sometime my atheist friends invite me to go to bars or super cool restaurant and so I still feel weird wearing dresses, leggings and stuff like that...but it's only because we've been told regularly that this kind of outfit are for the kafira and that it's not modest that it just got profoundly encrusted in your own head.

But as soon as you stop thinking you're doing something wrong, it will fade away. It's just thoughts....try to forget about it and just enjoy your time.

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Clothing issues after leaving?
Reply #2 - February 23, 2013, 08:51 PM

I have to wear 'modest' clothing around my family still, but I do wear fitting jeans and tops that show my arms and that's about as revealing as it can get. Oh and dresses that go below my knees with tights on underneath. I still have mum giving me dirty looks when relatives come over/we're going to visit relatives and I'm not wearing a top that goes down to cover my bottom & covered arms. She'll try and push me to wear something more islamic without trying to get into a fight with me, like saying crap like 'it's cold weather you should wear your long coat...' lol she's stresses certain things so much sometimes that it's just obvious what she's trying to do. Or classic dirty looks.

I told her I don't care much what other people judge me as, but she thinks such things are important...the whole 'keeping up appearances' act.

As for me personally, out and about, I'm comfortable in what I choose to wear now, shorts, skirts, dresses (I don't like the tight leggins thing, I don't think it's flattering fashion-wise honestly, especially when some girls wear it with normal tops and not long ones)

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Clothing issues after leaving?
Reply #3 - February 24, 2013, 06:41 AM

Yeah..

Gonna have to train myself to get used to shorts and stuff because I don't even do it at home.

I am a walking fashion disaster.

Recently I've started experimenting and buying clothes, high heels, etc but still can't figure how to mix and match if my life depended on it
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Clothing issues after leaving?
Reply #4 - February 24, 2013, 05:01 PM

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I am a walking fashion disaster.

Same here I was a complete fashion disaster until a couple of months ago.

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Gonna have to train myself to get used to shorts and stuff because I don't even do it at home.

lol this might sound weird but I'm a guy and I never confortable in shorts . (unless I'm at the gym but even then I usually wear track pants)

I just prefer pants for some reason.

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Clothing issues after leaving?
Reply #5 - February 25, 2013, 08:42 AM

I keep two wardrobes. I'm completely happy dressed in skirts and dresses and sleeveless tops, shorts etc when I'm away from home.

However, my wardrobe for when I go home consists of dresses, maxi skirts, mai dresses long tops, coloured jeans, various types of cardigans, blazers and leggings. And I still manage to be very fashionable and cover up by layering (I LOVE shopping). No one would say I am dressed specifically as a Muslim, no one's initial thought looking at me would be "look at how modestly she's dressed"- rather its always "what a great outfit" or "i wish I could think of pulling together things like" and I can meet non Muslim friends and they wouldn't bat an eyelid or think I look different.

I do this not to keep up appearances or because of what other people think, but because it's just more respectful to my family. It would hurt my mum to see me walk around sleeveless, silly as it is, or seeing me in a short top and fitted jeans would make my family feel uncomfortable. Life too short to have squabbles and arguments over outfits, and it takes far too much energy, also upsets you as well as everyone else. Remember that your parents are not the way they are because they are an enemy, in most cases they sincerely love their kids and we dont always understad their reasoning but advice they give us comes from a place where they think they doing good and out of love. I wish I realised this when I was younger.

Find a way to reflect your tastes and creativity and look like wider society but still allow your family to be comfortable. It's easier than you would think!
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