Greetings!
OP - May 26, 2013, 11:02 AM
Hi everyone
I just joined the forum in hopes of meeting like minded people.
My name is Lucia (changed it), I'm 21 and live in Melbourne, Australia. I have 7 sisters and 1 brother with no father. I left home when I was 19, in December 2011. After heavy deliberation and research, I was convinced that the Islamic faith was not for me. Mostly because I consider myself a free spirit and did not agree with the hate mongering, war mongering and misogynistic ideals in the Quran and Hadith. Leaving the religion wasn't hard as I was never conservative anyway and spent most of my life mimicking the Muslim rituals. I did connect with it during brief phases during my teenage years but it never spoke to me. I always somehow knew that I would leave, at one point or another. I am of mixed ethnicity and grew up in my father's Somali community in NZ, which was very strict and conservative. All the typical rules of a Muslim household and then some.
Truth is, I left partly because I just couldn't handle the intense micro managing and rules anymore. It was so rigid and I vastly outgrew the ideals my mother tried to instill in me. I didn't want to spend my youth being pious, I wanted to see friends and listen to music and wear whatever clothes I wanted, just like any other young girl. But more importantly, I had no spiritual or intellectual freedom and was encouraged to follow blindly with no room for critical thought. Any criticism of the religion was prohibited and I didn't dare voice my opinions. I woke up one morning, gathered my important documents and some clothes and just left. And didn't look back since. I have never doubted my reasonings and beliefs but felt more upset about leaving my family. I felt lonely for the longest time and am only just learning to accept that there won't ever be a family dynamic. I was never close to my family anyway but being away from them certainly does create a void, despite my happiness with my independence and the light feeling knowing there isn't an angry alpha male god watching my every move, silently judging me. I want to reach out to my sisters but I am still plucking up the courage, after a year of not speaking. They are harsh and we never got along but I am sure they are wondering about me. I am just concerned for my privacy and safety, first and foremost.
Sorry for the long post, this is the only place I can finally vent! The few friends I do have don't understand what I've been through and take their supportive family for granted. They just don't 'get it'.
I would love for anyone to tell me their experiences with dealing with severed relationships and how you have come to terms with it, if you have that is. And for anyone that is struggling or wants to talk then please feel free to talk to me. I would love to listen as I know the isolation.
Much love xx
Topic: Greetings!