puts out all sorts of hadith on that women marriage rules/suggestions so let me put them here
In the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful
Questions Related to Marriage
Ruling Concerning Birth Control:
Question: What is the ruling concerning birth control?
Response: This is a contemporary issue and many people ask about it. In the previous session of the Conference of the Leading Scholars [of Saudi Arabia], there was a study of this issue. They issued a verdict according to their opinion on this issue. In sum, they concluded that it is not allowed to take birth control pills. Allah has sanctioned the means that lead to procreation and a larger Muslim nation. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,
"Marry the child-bearing, loving woman for I shall outnumber the peoples by you on the Day of Resurrection."1
Another narration states at the end, "[outnumber] the prophets on the Day of Resurrection." The Muslim Nation is in need of being increased in numbers so that it may worship Allah, strive in His way, and defend the Muslims, by the will of Allah, from the plots of their enemies. It is a must to avoid such things [as birth control] and not to use them except in the cases of dire necessity. If there is a necessity, there is no harm. [This would be] for example, if the woman has some illness in her uterus or so forth that would harm her if she were to become pregnant. Then she may use such pills to the extent of her need. This is also the case if she already has many children and it would become a hardship on her to have another one soon, then she may use the birth control pills for a specific amount of time, such as one year or two years, which is the amount of time designated for breast feeding, until she reaches the stage where she would be able to raise the child properly. But if the women is taking them just so she will be free of responsibility or to be able to work or to live a comfortable life and other similar reasons why women take such pills these days, [it should be understood that] for these reasons it is not allowed to take birth control pills.
By Shaikh ibn Baz
Footnote :
1. This hadith is recorded by ibn Hibban, Ahmad, al-Tabarani and others. Without the words, "the Day of Resurrection," it is also narrated by Abu Dawud and al-Nasal. According to al-Albani, it is an authentic hadith due to its supporting chains. Muhammad Nasir al-Din al-Albani, Irwa al Ghaleel fi Takhreej Ahadeeth Manaar al-Sabeel (Beirut: al-Maktab al Islami, 1979), vol. 6, p. 195.--JZ
The Appropriate Age for Marriage:
Question: What is the appropriate age for men and women to marry? Some of the young ladies of today do not accept to be married to men older than them and also some of the men do not get married from anyone older than them either. We hope for a response, may Allah reward you.
Response: I advise the young ladies not to refuse a man because of his older age. Even if he be ten, twenty or thirty years older, this is not a valid excuse. The Prophet (peace be upon him) married Aisha when he was fifty-three years old and she was nine years old. Older age is not harmful. There is no problem if the woman is older than the man and there is no problem if the man is older than the woman. The Prophet (peace be upon him) married Khadijah when she was forty years old and he was twenty-five years old, before he received his first revelation. That is, she was fifteen years older than him (may Allah be pleased with her). And Aisha was married when she was a young lady of six or seven years and the Prophet (peace be upon him) consummated the marriage when she was nine years old and he was fifty-three years old. Many of those who talk on the radio or television and speak against having disparaging ages between husband and wife are wrong. It is not permissible for them to say such things. Instead, what must be done, is the woman must look at the prospective husband and, if he be pious and appropriate, she must agree to him even if he is older than her. Similarly, the man must try to marry a woman who is pious and virtuous, even if she is older than him, especially if she is still less than mid life. In any case, age should not be taken as an excuse. It should also not be considered a shortcoming, as long as the man is pious or the woman is pious. May Allah make the affairs good for everyone.
Shaikh ibn Baz
Marriage Comes First
Question: A common custom among the people nowadays is for a woman or her father to refuse a man's proposal so that she may finish high school, college or some specific amount of studying. What is the ruling concerning that? What is your advice for those who fall into that trap? Sometimes, the woman reaches the age of thirty or more and she has yet to get married!
Response: My advice to all young men and young women is to get married quickly if the means to it are made possible for you. This is because the Prophet (peace be upon him) has said,
"O youthful people, if any of you have the means to, he should get married, as it lowers the eyesight and protects the private parts. Those who have not the ability to do so should fast, as it will be a shield for him."
This was recorded by al-Bukhari and Muslim. The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said,
"If one whose religion and character pleases you proposes to you, you should marry him. If you do not do so, them will be tribulations in the land and great evil."
This was recorded by al-Tirmidhi with a hasan chain. The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said,
"Marry the child-bearing, loving woman for I shall outnumber the peoples by you on the Day of Resurrection."
This was recorded by Ahmad and graded sahih by ibn Hibban. Therefore, there are many benefits to marriage which the Prophet (peace be upon him) alluded to, including lowering the gaze, protecting the private parts, increasing the numbers of the Muslim Nation and being saved from great evil and misfortune.
May Allah grant to all what is best for their religion and worldly lives. He is All-Hearing, Close.
Shaikh ibn Baz
The Young Lady is Not to be Forced to Marry a Man She Does Not Want to Marry
Question: Is it allowed for a father to force his daughter to marry a specific man that she does not want to many?
Response: Neither the father nor anyone other than the father may force a woman who is under his guardianship to marry a man that she does not want to many. In fact, her permission must be sought. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said,
"The non-virgin [without a husband] must not be married until she is consulted. A virgin must not be married until her permission is sought." They said, "O Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) how is her permission given?" He said, "By her being silent." Another narration states, "Her silence is her permission." Yet a third narration states, "A virgin's father seeks her permission and her permission is her remaining silent."1
The father must seek her permission if she is nine years of age or above. Similarly, her other guardians may not marry her off except by her permission. This is obligatory upon all of them. If one is married without permission, then the marriage is not valid. This is because one of the conditions of the marriage is that both partners accept the marriage. If she is married without her permission, by threat or coercion, then the marriage is not valid. The only exception is in the case of the father and his daughter who is less than nine years of age. There is no harm if he gets her married while she is less than nine years old, according to the correct opinion. This is based on the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) marrying Aisha without her consent when she was less than nine years old, as is stated in authentic Hadith. However, if she is nine years old or more, she cannot be married, even by her father, except with her consent. The husband should not approach the woman if he knows that she does not want him, even if the father approves of it. He must fear Allah and not approach any wife that did not want him even if her father claims that he did not coerce her. He must avoid what Allah has forbidden for him. This is because the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) ordered that her permission must be sought. We also advise the woman to fear Allah and to accept the man if her father finds that he is suitable to marry her, as long as the prospective groom is good in his religion and character. This is true even if the one who is doing the marrying is not the girl's father [but her legal guardian]. We make this advice because there is lots of good and lot of benefits in marriage. Also, there are lots of hazards in living as a maiden. I advise all young ladies to accept those men who come to them if they are qualified. They should not use schooling, teaching or other causes as an excuse to avoid marriage.
By Shaikh ibn Baz
Topic: Have you been to Ummah.com ?