Im joining the ex muslim bandwagon

. Im an indian muslim . I had been skeptic about my religion from the past year and now even before i knew it i became an apostate . I have never been devout and only prayed during friday prayers and in the last days of ramadan every year . It is more of a cultural thing rather than a religious thing . Before 18 i didnt even care about religion or any concept of god . Parents are not so religious and very secular minded though they have been getting more religious recently probably due to their age .
So unlike other muslims i have never been indoctrinated as a child so it is not too much of a problem to leave islam .
I only gave thought about religion when i entered college . It was an islamic college and as you would guess most of my college mates are muslims . I had never been in an environment where muslims are everywhere . I had no problems with most muslims other than some orthodox asshats . I always come across questions from people about why i never pray in the local masjid . I always try to change the topic to escape the awkward situation . But seeing them pray everyday diligently kinda made me feel let down . So i also started to go to the masjid everyday for prayers for an average 2 times per day mostly the evening prayers .
It gives a tingling feeling you know . Like praying and trying to make a connection with god makes you feel a little happy . But since i still dont go a lot i get remarks from nearby orthodox big bearded guys who always and ALWAYS preach me to pray regularly and sometimes use the pleasures of heaven and the tortures of hell tactic . I actually believed in most of the stuff then .
So i tried harder to become a better muslim by praying but i never recite the quran . I never learnt arabic so i simply cant recite . So i decided to read the translations instead ...
I wasnt really mesmerised as i thought i would be . Most of what i read was about how allah is so great and mercifull for this and this etc and about how muhammed is so perfect and all with very vague reasons and concepts . I actually lost interest .
I always wondered about why muslims are stereotyped as terrorists and so i read a lot of websites about certain controversial verses in the quran and about muhammed such as killing idolators , wife beating , marriage of aisha , large numbers of jews massacred etc . I was surprised and kinda shocked . My mind started getting corrupted after a lot of reading on ali sina and wiki islam so much that i started to grow more repulsive about my religion . That guy ali sina even though his articles do contain content is a very hatefull person from his writings .
I grew very confused and i started watching videos of debates between different religions including atheism . They didnt help . It only made me feel more lost and mad . Its like i am fighting against myself in my head . After lots of reflection and pondering i have finally let go of islam and now i follow NOSHITISM . It means i give no shits for anything anymore . I dont care about islam,christianity,buddhist,atheist,skydaddy,creation,evolution or anything remotely close to any religion . I am finally content and now im an ex muslim even though i wasnt that devout of a muslim to start with .
I really like cemb a lot . I always read a lot of threads and blogs here and its always interesting . I also see many interesting people here such as happymurtad,quod and jedi . I hope to be a part of the group .
