I struggle with this one for sure.
My wife's family is very conservative and are all about Islam. Heck, my brother in-law is an imam.
It's a very strong identity and community.
My own parents, I'm far less worried about. I can tell them not to do anything, and by in large they live a relaxing life.
It's not even about forcing things on them. Quite frankly, the whole Islamic environment is toxic.
I think it is right and proper for every parents to create a good environment for their kid.
I wouldn't leave my kids alone with an abusive crack head.
Teaching them about hell is pretty cruel and all kinds of false beliefs is cruel.
Having their relatives and peers demean them for imaginary rules is cruel. The glares and looks of doing something inappropriate, like god forbid standing and peeing.
I was watching the VICE documentary about ISIS
https://news.vice.com/video/the-islamic-state-part-1(amazing video btw) and there are adults teaching their kids about the great Islamic state and fighting for it, and the kids have guns... and most western muslims are appalled by it...appalled at the indoctrination.
But I really and truly don't see the difference between that and what most Muslims teach their kids.
The only difference is this ISIS group is engaged in a war.
Most Muslims teach their kids on the greatness of the Muslim empires, the great greatness of the prophet, the strong Islamic identity, the strong attachment to Mecca and Hajj, submission to god's law, the complete lack of questioning...
The only difference I see is ISIS is teaching these kids about violence.
It's not really the indoctrination part that bothers people, it's the violence. The indoctrination part, I see every Muslim parent doing.
I don't see the difference between the ISIS guys coaxing their kids by saying "You don't want to live in Beligam. You want to live in the Islamic state. right... and we want to fight the infidels..."
And that is just what most Muslim parents do coaxing their kids to recite kalimas, wear hijab, pray, reject western society, reject free thinkers, support the mosques, go on hajj. Heck, my niece on my wife's side was just taken for hajj and is not indoctrinated talking about MEDINA MEDINA and MECCA!
Sacrificing your kids for the comforting sake of your parents is a pretty bad thing in my view.
If you're going to have kids, you should be able to lay down the ground rules for your parents as they live in the house.
Heck, we as ex-muslim might even more opposed to something just because of our history.
Topic: Raising kids