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 Topic: Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.

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  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     OP - June 21, 2016, 10:17 PM
    So I thought I'd start this topic for everyone to vent and show their common and uncommon dislikes they had growing or looking back at our religious upbringings.

    So I'll start with mine: TAJWEED!

    Like dude...omg. If you're not desi you might not understand this but basically if you're from a non-arab background we go through our madrassas and learn to read arabic. The catch? we don't learn the language, we just learn the alphabet and how to read it.

    So imagine you were reading Shakespeare and you could totally read it fine! But it might as well have been an alien script because you couldn't understand a word! You're technically literate but it's all gibberish!

    Now I want to be very clear, I have no problem with learning another language. I would have been grateful to have learned an extra language. But instead I know how to read the Quran and I can't even do that anymore...welp.

    Enjoy!
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #1 - June 21, 2016, 11:07 PM
    You basically just summed up the most ridiculous part of my Islamic upbringing.

    The thing I enjoyed the most when attending my Madrassa was learning Arabic, but that kind of ended abruptly. Apparently though, the Arabic teacher, who made children do the frog and banging heads together was too extreme for the corporal punishment advocating Imam. And learning Arabic certainly wasn't that important for them as there never was a replacement teacher.

    I would say the pet peeve that I find the most frustrating is how a lot Muslims become holier than thou for Ramadhan and then go back to their normal ways when Eid arrives.

    If you ever been to the Curry Mile in Manchester on Eid you probably would include that as a pet peeve. To be honest though, The amount of Pakistan flags you would see being waved would probably make you question if they were celebrating Pakistan's independence.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #2 - June 21, 2016, 11:42 PM
    Haha yeah there's a lot of national pride marred with religion. Oh and yes our 'imam' issued corporal punishment as well. Not the best way to make your kids enjoy being Muslim.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #3 - June 22, 2016, 12:42 AM
    Salatul Asr. It was always such a pain in the ass, especially in the west. It always managed to catch you at the most inconvenient times: when you're stuck in rush hour traffic, or when your on the bus or train heading home from school or work, or when you're rushing trying to complete that last minute errand before the bank or office closes for the day.

    Other prayers had their element of hassle, but nothing was ever quite as bad or annoying as Asr. Isha was late, so even if it meant staying up a little later than you felt like, you were at least at home relaxing with little else better to do. On nights that saw you out late, you had hours to get the prayer in anyway before its time expired.

    Maghrib was at least a pretty prayer. Something about sunsets seems to set that spiritual vibe just right regardless of what you're doing, and imams are known for keeping maghrib short and sweet, as is the sunnah.

    Thuhr could always be done on a lunch break, and even though no one really enjoys waking up before the crack of dawn to make two rakaat of fajr, at least there was no where else you really had to be at the time. If you were lucky, you could even catch a couple more hours worth of Z's afterwards before your presence was expected anywhere important.

    But not asr. Asr always seemed to catch you at the busiest part of your day, awkwardly rushing to wash your hands, face,  head and feet in some disgusting public restroom so you could find a spot in the corner and out of public view to hurry through the formalities of bowing and kneeling on the hard ground.

    In the winter, or when it was raining, your best estimate of the Qibla would just have to do, because even if you couldn't see the sun through the clouds in order to guesstimate the proper direction , you knew that if you didn't get those 4 sets in soon, the sun would be gone and so would your chance of not pissing Allah off by getting the prayer in on time.

    If you were lucky enough to find a mosque, chances are the doors would be locked because no one was there, so you'd still end up praying outside on the ground. Not even imams like asr, it seems.

    Asr was stressful. Asr was cumbersome. Asr was void of any real spiritual fulfillment. Maybe that's why Allah liked it so much.

    "Guard your prayers, especially the middle prayer" 2:238
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #4 - June 22, 2016, 01:03 AM
    Haha! That sir, was a brilliant read. Ah yes the everlasting virtues prayer. How incovenient. I hated Dhuhr mostly because it was too long so early. I always prayed the shortened version of all of them. But even the shortened Dhuhr SUCKED! Ugh.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #5 - June 22, 2016, 03:27 PM
    - When your quran teacher smacks your hand with a pencil when you make a mistake reading the quran. As if it fixes the mistake.

    - When girls are told they cannot play basketball in the school court because they need to lift their abayas in order to do it.

    - When someone starts skipping the songs in disney movies because they're "haram".

  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #6 - June 22, 2016, 03:51 PM
    XD I'm loving these.

    The Disney/music one is so true. Although that was more when we were kids. Headphones counteract that problem pretty nicely.  whistling2


    My pet peeve - You must sleep in this very specific, uncomfortable, way every night for the rest of your life.

    http://www.whydontyoutrythis.com/2015/10/why-you-should-be-sleeping-on-the-left-side.html
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #7 - June 22, 2016, 04:38 PM
    Asr was my favourite, because it doesn't have any sunnah prayer afterwards. Grin

    My biggest pet peeve is probably how I was supposed to be my sisters' and cousins' "guardian" or whatever the fuck. My dad would alternate between "You need to protect your sisters' honour" to "It's none of your business" (when I took their side).

    I really couldn't keep up with all the social rules regarding women. Like this one time I mentioned my female cousins' names to a bunch of strangers and apparently that's a big faux pas. Oh yeah and this one time I was with my female cousins while they were flirting with a bunch of guys and then the guys came up to me and asked me how I can allow them to talk to strangers.  Cheesy Cheesy
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #8 - June 22, 2016, 05:39 PM
    Quote from: CarnageScarlet on June 22, 2016, 03:51 PM

    My pet peeve - You must sleep in this very specific, uncomfortable, way every night for the rest of your life.

    http://www.whydontyoutrythis.com/2015/10/why-you-should-be-sleeping-on-the-left-side.html


    I thought that wasn't required, only recommended since its sunnah? I could never sleep on my right side.

    As for a pet peeve, that would probably be having to make up a week of fasting after every Ramadan. Not that it was too difficult to do, it was just annoying having been to be reminded that I owe fasts.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #9 - June 22, 2016, 11:34 PM
    Quote from: CarnageScarlet on June 22, 2016, 03:51 PM
    XD I'm loving these.

    The Disney/music one is so true. Although that was more when we were kids. Headphones counteract that problem pretty nicely.  whistling2


    My pet peeve - You must sleep in this very specific, uncomfortable, way every night for the rest of your life.

    http://www.whydontyoutrythis.com/2015/10/why-you-should-be-sleeping-on-the-left-side.html




    WTFFF!? I've never come across this lmao.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #10 - June 23, 2016, 07:58 AM
    Quote from: AutumnButterfly on June 22, 2016, 05:39 PM
    I thought that wasn't required, only recommended since its sunnah? I could never sleep on my right side.

    As for a pet peeve, that would probably be having to make up a week of fasting after every Ramadan. Not that it was too difficult to do, it was just annoying having been to be reminded that I owe fasts.



    You're right. To my knowledge it is just sunnah to sleep on your right but it is also haram to sleep on your stomach... because Shaytan 'sleeps' on his stomach.   wacko
    And I've heard that sleeping with your feet to the kabah is haram... and sleeping on your left side is detested (makruh).

    Apparently, for every day you dont fast in ramadan, you need to make up for it with 60 days of fasting. So if you miss 10 days you have to spend the next two years in constant fasting...
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #11 - June 23, 2016, 07:59 AM
    Quote from: Hsnake on June 22, 2016, 11:34 PM


    WTFFF!? I've never come across this lmao.

    Yeah sleepovers with cousins got very annoying because of this weird rule XD
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #12 - June 23, 2016, 08:12 AM
    Ok I wasn't raised as a Muslim but loving some of these Grin

    Mine would be the habit of, as bringing food to my mouth, catching myself still saying.. well it's actually like bism... or bismi... at least I'm not getting to the important bit!

    Best thing is saying bismillah when taking a drag on a rollie Cheesy   though it shows how deeply ingrained the habit is.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #13 - June 23, 2016, 11:37 AM
    Quote from: CarnageScarlet on June 23, 2016, 07:58 AM

    You're right. To my knowledge it is just sunnah to sleep on your right but it is also haram to sleep on your stomach... because Shaytan 'sleeps' on his stomach.   wacko
    And I've heard that sleeping with your feet to the kabah is haram... and sleeping on your left side is detested (makruh).

    Apparently, for every day you dont fast in ramadan, you need to make up for it with 60 days of fasting. So if you miss 10 days you have to spend the next two years in constant fasting...


    I actually came across that two month rule with a shia gf I had once. I raised a moderate sunni had no idea about this, I though you just made up for the days. It's a ridiculous rule and suffice to say she would have to make up for quite a few with what we got up to lol.

    Also yes the whole feet towards qibla and if your shoes or sandals were pointing sole-side up! That shit pissed me off. Like let me stretch my legs anywhere I want!!!
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #14 - June 23, 2016, 01:10 PM
    I don't think it is just Shia who do the sixty days thing. On a sunni mosques Ramadhan calendar, it states that if you break a fast you have to make up for it by either fasting 60 days continuously, feed 60 destitute twice a day or pay the amount to them which is equivalent to it. However, this might just be a new thing for Sunnis, I first heard about this practice only this year and I have broken my fast in front of Muslims on many occasions over the years with this being mentioned.

    https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13315405_1110532795671693_8203431659846989889_n.jpg?oh=eee69927b35eea046e6d1b8dcdd1eeee&oe=57F9BA7F

    The feet towards the qibla was certainly annoying, but certainly not as much as having to kiss the Quran whenever it was disrespected in some way.

    If you drop it on the floor. Kiss the Quran

    If you, or someone else, put your/their feet higher than it. Kiss the Quran

    If you don't put it down gently onto the bench before reading it. Kiss the Quran
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #15 - June 23, 2016, 01:19 PM
    I remember there being debates about whether kissing the Quran was necessary or not when I was on FB. Hilarious, so meaningless.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #16 - June 23, 2016, 01:23 PM
    It makes sense for why Muslims are so reactionary when it comes to the Quran when you consider the level of intimacy they would of had with it throughout their lifetime.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #17 - June 23, 2016, 02:31 PM
    [quote a
    Quote from: CarnageScarlet link=topic=30162.msg855131#msg855131 date=
    [/quote
    Apparently, for every day you dont fast in ramadan, you need to make up for it with 60 days of fasting. So if you miss 10 days you have to spend the next two years in constant fasting...


    I thought that rule is only for when you intentionally break your fast. At least that was what I was taught.. If it's because of menstrual cycles (which is what I was referring to..) you don't have to do 60 days just  make up any days you missed. It's the same for pregnancy I think.

  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #18 - June 23, 2016, 03:26 PM
    I think those are the exceptions yes, which tbh at this point I'm surprised religion could be so understanding!
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #19 - June 23, 2016, 04:58 PM
    Quote from: AutumnButterfly on June 23, 2016, 02:31 PM
    I thought that rule is only for when you intentionally break your fast. At least that was what I was taught.. If it's because of menstrual cycles (which is what I was referring to..) you don't have to do 60 days just  make up any days you missed. It's the same for pregnancy I think.




    Yeah I know.... it's only for if you break your fast on purpose but 60 days is pretty undoable especially considering I've missed like 15 days already :/ I doubt many people actually go through with it though.

    It's a bit like the argument I hear every now and then that stoning gays to death is Allahs way of highlighting the severity of sexual misconduct... but death sentences obviously can't be carried out that often... so at some point, zMuhammad made it clear that 4 male witnesses are needed to kill a sexual deviant.

    It's the sort of intimidation tactics that probably worked well in the bronze ages... a bit like in colonial America where they would occasionally hang a rebellious slave to set an example... but in the modern day those Sharia rulings just lead to pointless atrocities.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #20 - June 23, 2016, 05:27 PM
    Yeah in the 600AD Arabia context the teachings/rulings might have actually made some sound sense. Not so much anymore, especially when everything is so visible.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #21 - June 23, 2016, 05:43 PM
    Having to atribute my success to god and not being able to take credit for what is clearly my effort.
    Having to attribute my failures to  myself because I didnt pray enough or study enough.

    It's never Allah's fucking fault. Like great he is helping me breeze through calculus and doesn't mind the kids dying of dehydration in Africa, That asshole has his priorities messed up.  finmad and everyone refuses to see this. Bringing this up is whispers of the devil.

    Oh and no critical thinking when it starts to oppose Islam cuz that is the devil whispering we need to ignore those thoughts and we need to pray more. No bitch you can't pray logic away.
    As a scientist I can see farther than any human before me by standing on the shoulders of giants (previous scientists); As a religious follower I can not see what is right in-front of me, even when others INDEPENDENTLY see the same thing!
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #22 - June 23, 2016, 06:08 PM
    Quote from: Jimel on June 23, 2016, 05:24 PM
    Some converts once said you should make up for every Ramadan you missed before you became a Muslim.
    How about no.


    It could drastically reduce the number of converts.
     whistling2

    But it should go the other way too, then.
    When you leave the faith, make sure to have at least as many months where you enjoy sleeping, abstain from silly rituals, eat healthy food in sensible amounts when you are hungry, dress comfortably and avoid any "holier than thou" competitions.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #23 - June 23, 2016, 06:34 PM
    Every murtad should observe Rave-adan at least once in a lifetime.  Wink cool2
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #24 - June 23, 2016, 06:34 PM
    Quote from: Ursus on June 23, 2016, 06:08 PM
    It could drastically reduce the number of converts.
     whistling2

    But it should go the other way too, then.
    When you leave the faith, make sure to have at least as many months where you enjoy sleeping, abstain from silly rituals, eat healthy food in sensible amounts when you are hungry, dress comfortably and avoid any "holier than thou" competitions.


    Amen!
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #25 - June 23, 2016, 08:47 PM
    Quote from: ibn Bilal on June 23, 2016, 06:34 PM
    Every murtad should observe Rave-adan at least once in a lifetime.  Wink cool2

    Erm. I'm a revert. Reverted about 2 weeks ago. Back to being a smoker. Often seems to be this silly month of torture that makes me a revert, if I even apostated from nicotine since last time.

    Ibn Bilal, I was always convinced I'd never, ever want to try anything other than plain old regular tobacco in my sensibly sized, cut corner, medium weight Rizlas. However, I fear you and Berbs are having an influence on me  dance

    I'd be like this chappy - ->  wacko
    ... and this one - ->  dance
    ... and this one - ->  Grin

    ... all rolled into one Cheesy

    Only thing is I've no idea how to get hold of any! Cheesy Cheesy
  • Re: Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #26 - June 24, 2016, 01:34 AM
    Quote from: SilentMancunian on June 23, 2016, 01:10 PM
    The feet towards the qibla was certainly annoying, but certainly not as much as having to kiss the Quran whenever it was disrespected in some way.

    If you drop it on the floor. Kiss the Quran

    If you, or someone else, put your/their feet higher than it. Kiss the Quran

    If you don't put it down gently onto the bench before reading it. Kiss the Quran

    Ah, yes! And in my family, at least, not just the Qu'ran, but any piece of paper with any portion of the Qu'ran printed or photocopied on it. This all felt incredibly silly to me even when I was a strong believer.

    Quote from: afghan hassan on June 23, 2016, 05:43 PM
    Having to atribute my success to god and not being able to take credit for what is clearly my effort.
    Having to attribute my failures to  myself because I didnt pray enough or study enough.

    It's never Allah's fucking fault. Like great he is helping me breeze through calculus and doesn't mind the kids dying of dehydration in Africa, That asshole has his priorities messed up.  finmad and everyone refuses to see this. Bringing this up is whispers of the devil.

    This, a hundred times this. Being constantly reminded that my successes were never my own doing and that credit for my hard work belonged to Allah and not me, well, it did no favors for my self-esteem.

    Attributing good things to Allah, and thanking him for them, but never blaming him for bad things. No--when bad things happen, they pray to him. When bad things happen, it's for a reason. Always for a reason. This relationship with Allah is like that of a child with an abusive parent.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #27 - June 24, 2016, 03:53 AM
    Quote from: afghan hassan on June 23, 2016, 05:43 PM
    Having to atribute my success to god and not being able to take credit for what is clearly my effort.
    Having to attribute my failures to  myself because I didnt pray enough or study enough.

    It's never Allah's fucking fault. Like great he is helping me breeze through calculus and doesn't mind the kids dying of dehydration in Africa, That asshole has his priorities messed up.  finmad and everyone refuses to see this. Bringing this up is whispers of the devil.

    Oh and no critical thinking when it starts to oppose Islam cuz that is the devil whispering we need to ignore those thoughts and we need to pray more. No bitch you can't pray logic away.



    Yess.... So very very true! My parents used to call me 'shaytan incarnate' in our language, when I didn't want to memorise more quran and instead asked questions about the english translation as a kid...

    And @Iceman I was just thinking about the abusive parent thing. The problem is that many cultures don't even recognise the fault of abusive parents but instead applaud them for their harshness and ability to make kids submit. It's part of the eastern worldview that parents be placed on a pedestal automatically regardless of how they treat the individual child. For example my father is abusive but non of my extended family really care.

    My cousins are honestly are great people but more than anything they hate being presented with stories disproving their fallacious worldview... they refuse to except it. It irks me that some of them actually speak to governmental representatives and work in mental health... the fact that they represent the best that muslims have to offer in those very important fields is depressing but revealing of conservative Islamic culture.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #28 - June 24, 2016, 03:54 AM
    I feel like all muslims function as a hivemind where 'Allah' is like a background service, constantly running on a low level. Billions of eyes, hands and tongues ready to ensure the will of the creator is carried out. They interpret everything that occurs in the world using a similarly distorted narrative lens and so the victimisation of Muslims becomes a self fulfilling prophecy etc.  Like an Artificial Intelligence spread across billions of computer devices, God is everywhere that believers roam.

    You could probably extend this to other religions too.

    The power of the Gods can be seen through the actions of the many believers in such Gods.
  • Your worst pet peeve being raised as a Muslim.
     Reply #29 - June 24, 2016, 05:30 PM
    Quote from: Iceman on June 24, 2016, 01:34 AM
    Ah, yes! And in my family, at least, not just the Qu'ran, but any piece of paper with any portion of the Qu'ran printed or photocopied on it. This all felt incredibly silly to me even when I was a strong believer.

    Lol. You just reminded me of how every piece of paper with my name or any Islamic names had to be treated with respect. If my father ever saw me leave a letter, or any document with my name, on the floor I would get a lecture about the significance of the name in Islam.
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