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Theme Changer

 Poll

  • Question: Who gets it for April?  (Voting closed: April 05, 2016, 03:51 PM)
  • BurqaRentalsInc - 4 (57.1%)
  • Yeezevee - 3 (42.9%)
  • Total Voters: 7

 Topic: Jester of the month!!

 (Read 415260 times)
  • Previous page 1 ... 93 94 9596 97 ... 114 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2820 - February 01, 2013, 08:36 PM

    @tabularasa
    Cheesy Isn't it suspicious how Jibreel always pops up and gives revelations at very convenient times for the receiver of said revelations? First Muhammad, and now happy murtad. 



     Grin

    HM should start receiving visits from Jibreel whenever he wants something - like if his friends wanna go to Burger King but HM wants to go for Pizza, Jibreel will send him a revelation from the almighty that he is displeased by Burger King and his apostles desire for Pizza must be paramount!

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2821 - February 01, 2013, 08:40 PM

    Yes Al-Alethia.  Next thing you know, he is gonna claim that he's illiterate too.  I wanna know if Happy has a BFF named Ibn Warraq.  I'm slightly scared that a revelation may come down now about our suspicious minds.....er, oh well, as long as he throws in the lottery numbers somewhere, it's all good!


    Cheesy
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2822 - February 01, 2013, 09:38 PM

    Poll open.   parrot

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2823 - February 01, 2013, 11:39 PM

    This is a really tough one whistling2

    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2824 - February 02, 2013, 12:25 AM

    1. Perish the keyboard of Tabula Rasa and perish her mouse!
    2. To no avail shall be her internet connection that runs inside her house.
    3. Unless she admits that our revelations are the best
    4. In truth do we reveal to thee, and we do not jest
    5. Verily, those who do not vote for happy murtad, they shall be put to the test.
    6. And forced to wear a dunce cap and matching dunce vest.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2825 - February 02, 2013, 02:38 AM

    This is hard - first time in history two people I like are nominated here. There's no way to please them both. Such a conundrum. I need to find out what's "dunce" before I decide to flip a coin.

    "That it is indeed the speech of an illustrious messenger" (The Koran 69:40)
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2826 - February 02, 2013, 02:48 AM

    Narrated Abu Maskharah who said, The messenger PBUH said "Verily the dunce cap of the hereafter is 70 times sillier than the dunce cap of the dunya." Agreed upon
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2827 - February 02, 2013, 02:38 PM

    whoopsie Happy, you got my vote before I read your last surah up there.  suppose I need a new revelation exalting my station in Jibreel's eyes.  Plus *cough cough* those powerball numbers.....

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2828 - February 02, 2013, 05:11 PM

    1. Oh ye murtad, enjoy life and follow not the ways of those who doubt.
    2. Verily those who post posts early on Saturday morning, they should have known that thou were in thy room knocked out.
    3. And had they waited until thou waketh, it would have been better for them, yea, that is the better route.
    4. And they say, if only he could bring us lottery numbers from his lord, so that we may gain money.
    5. Thus do they mock you, and it really is not that funny.
    6. Verily, those who came before you asked for lottery numbers, so we gave them fake numbers, thus did we play a prank.
    7. For had we given them real numbers, they would have deposited it, and someone could have robbed the bank!
    8. Or maybe  they might have gone on a cruise, but what if the cruise ship sank?
    8. So in reality we saved them and they have us to thank.
    9. Thus does your lord change the subject when they try to call your bluff.
    10. So tell Tabula Rasa that she's still cool...
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2829 - February 02, 2013, 05:13 PM


    Or at least cool enough.
    11. She considers it a favor unto you that she voted for you, say "consider not your voting a favor. Rather, the SWT considers it a favor to you that he lets you read these awesome verses, if you really believe.

    12. So vote ye for happymurtad, and enjoy the revelations he doth receive.
  • Re: Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2830 - February 02, 2013, 05:33 PM

    4. And they say, if only he could bring us lottery numbers from his lord, so that we may gain money.
    5. Thus do they mock you, and it really is not that funny.
    6. Verily, those who came before you asked for lottery numbers, so we gave them fake numbers, thus did we play a prank.
    7. For had we given them real numbers, they would have deposited it, and someone could have robbed the bank!
    8. Or maybe  they might have gone on a cruise, but what if the cruise ship sank?
    8. So in reality we saved them and they have us to thank.
    9. Thus does your lord change the subject when they try to call your bluff.


    Brilliant! You really capture the essence of the quran there. Cheesy

    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2831 - February 02, 2013, 07:44 PM

    You have a real talent for this stuff HM. A lot of it (all of it?) is eerily similar to the Quran in terms of writing style.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2832 - February 02, 2013, 07:45 PM

    This stuff needs to be shared with the world.

    Next time HM has an argument with his girlfriend Jibreel will appear telling her she's wrong.

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2833 - February 02, 2013, 09:02 PM

    Both these polls close in about half an hour, so anyone who hasn't voted get your vote in before then.   thnkyu

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2834 - February 02, 2013, 09:41 PM

    Congratulations Happy Murtad.   dance

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2835 - February 02, 2013, 10:21 PM

    Cry

    Congratulations, HM. far away hug

    Life is what happens to you while you're staring at your smartphone.

    Eternal Sunshine of the Religionless Mind
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2836 - February 02, 2013, 10:30 PM

    Yayy! Jibreel is speechless right now! Thanks guys!  far away hug
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2837 - February 02, 2013, 10:31 PM

    Congratulations dude  Afro
    Eagerly waits for a divine revelation to celebrate the occasion.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2838 - February 02, 2013, 10:53 PM

    Has anyone ever won Jester of the Month immediately after winning Poster of the Month?! I think HM is on some record breaking vibe here!

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2839 - February 02, 2013, 11:10 PM

    Allah helps his prophets like that. It's a miracle, kinda like Mo splitting the moon.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2840 - February 02, 2013, 11:15 PM

     Cheesy lmao
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2841 - February 02, 2013, 11:19 PM

    I'm loving the contemplative 3 minute pause (not to mention the marked change of tone, from borderline praise, to snark) between ayat 10 and 11.   Roll Eyes

    Must've been a hiccup there in the time/space continuum, no?

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2842 - February 02, 2013, 11:22 PM

    Al Alethia, now, don't scoff, cuz you know when Neil Armstrong went to the moon he actually SAW the split in the moon's surface......and then heard a celestial adhan call.....then he came back to earth and took his shahada.  (True Muslim Urban Legend)

    Do not go gentle into that good night.
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2843 - February 02, 2013, 11:26 PM

    ^LOL. True Muslim Urban Legend.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2844 - February 02, 2013, 11:34 PM

    Cheesy WHAT? I've heard Pope John Paul II was a closet Muslim  I didn't know there was a whole back story involving a Malaysian boy. 
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2845 - February 02, 2013, 11:59 PM

    Jibreel wanted to keep it short and sweet for the occasion:

    1. When the victory of SWT comes, and the nomination.
    2. And thou seeth the people voting for thee without hesitation.
    3. Then celebrate with tequila and take shots.
    4. For there is nothing wrong with a little intoxication.
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2846 - February 03, 2013, 12:14 AM

     sloshed

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2847 - February 03, 2013, 12:15 AM


    True Muslim Urban Legend.


    This is a thread waiting to happen ^^^

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2848 - February 03, 2013, 03:42 AM

    Congratulations HappyMurtad.  Smiley

    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Jester of the month!!
     Reply #2849 - March 01, 2013, 02:23 AM

    Nominations, please.   thnkyu

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Previous page 1 ... 93 94 9596 97 ... 114 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »