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Theme Changer

 Topic: Hello from Mowgli

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  • Hello from Mowgli
     OP - December 18, 2009, 11:41 PM
    hello folks.
    Just a short hello from me.  Smiley

    I live in London, and am of Pakistani origin. I have been raised in the UK in a conservative muslim family. My life has been one massive public lie. I pass myself off in the real world as a regular goody-goody muslim family guy. The truth of the matter, is very different:

    1. Inside, despite my 'act', I am very happy to share with you that I am not a muslim and have never truly ever been. I renounce my religion. I hereby declare that I do not believe in Allah nor Mohammad. I do not believe in the Quran. (Writing this feels so so bloody good...why didn't I do this years ago!)

    2. I am gay. I am sexually attracted to males, and have been since my earliest sexual memories. I have been having closeted gay sexual experiences for many years, and continue to do so.

    I hope this forum is an outlet for me to be my true-self and not have to conform to others' expectations on religion and sexuality. I look forward to some good conversation and hopefully making some friends.

    Love
    Mowgli

    ps the name Mowgli was given to me by a male 'massage' guy who I used to visit in my late teens. He gave nicknames to all his clients. When he set  his eyes upon this happy slim dark youth in nothing but red undies, the choice of nickname was easy grin12
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #1 - December 19, 2009, 12:00 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 18, 2009, 11:41 PM
    ps the name Mowgli was given to me by a male 'massage' guy

    Why is my head ringing with the tune 'bare necessities'?  

    Anyway Mowgli, that name rules  Cheesy  Do you look like this?



    I think its really desperately sad that you cannot be who you are and have to play a pretend role in front of everyone else, the role of an actor in your real life.  How old are you if you dont mind me asking?  Do you ever intend on 'coming out' - must be doubly hard as you have 2 things to come out about!

    Also let us know what started your doubts (as far as I know Islam does not directly offend LGBTs) and let us know how you found us.

    Hope to hear more from you  Afro
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #2 - December 19, 2009, 12:02 AM
    P.S Can I suggest you use the image I just posted as your avatar?  I am sure the mods will help you if you need some assistance as your new..
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #3 - December 19, 2009, 12:18 AM
    Welcome Mowgli! grin12 dance
    German ex-Muslim forum — My YouTube — List of Ex-Muslims —
    Wikis: en – de – fr – ar – tr
    CEMB-Chat
    I'm on an indefinite break...
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #4 - December 19, 2009, 12:20 AM
    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 12:02 AM
    P.S Can I suggest you use the image I just posted as your avatar?  I am sure the mods will help you if you need some assistance as your new..

    Done. Cheesy
    German ex-Muslim forum — My YouTube — List of Ex-Muslims —
    Wikis: en – de – fr – ar – tr
    CEMB-Chat
    I'm on an indefinite break...
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #5 - December 19, 2009, 12:22 AM
     Cheesy No-one is gonna look at this innocent cartoon character with red pants in the same way again
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #6 - December 19, 2009, 12:29 AM
    Thanks for the warm welcome IsLame.

    I think deep down I have always had my doubts about Islam.  I am in my mid30s now. I think the truth is clear when one is alone. And when I am alone I stop my act, I become myself. For example, for many many years now, my only prayers have been when obligated to join family/friends when they pray. When alone, I never pray. I am myself.

    Why did I stray? I dont know to be honest. I tried damn hard to be a good muslim, to impresss my family and friends and to 'fit in'. But it was never sincere. I dont think I ever believed all that religious gobbledygook. I think there is probably a connection with my 'perverse' sexuality, but I dont know how.

    I don't know if I will ever come out (on both fronts). I know I have been a coward and have been imposter, a fake, a fraud. I am not proud of that. But I am what I am. Maybe one day I will be caught out. That would almost be a relief. It's so difficult playing a triple life. The older I get, the less I give a fuck what others think. But who knows. Lets see where my adventures take me.

    As for what I look like, I will find an image to satisfy your curiosity. I'd like to make it a bit more adult and risque maybe, less cartoonish!
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #7 - December 19, 2009, 12:47 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 12:29 AM
    As for what I look like, I will find an image to satisfy your curiosity. I'd like to make it a bit more adult and risque maybe, less cartoonish!

    Mowgli's bulging underpants is enough risque for now, thanks.

    How did you come across this forum by the way?
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #8 - December 19, 2009, 12:49 AM
    Welcome Mowgli!

    How much do you think your sexual orientation contributed to your disbelief in Islam? I'm asking because lots of us have reached out conlusions from various directions: logical, emotional, social etc.
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #9 - December 19, 2009, 01:18 AM
    Thanks Kafirist.

    I dont honestly know what, if any, the link is between my sexual desires and my rejection of islam. Its something I have thought about alot.

    My gut instinct is that as my sexuality is considered a deviancy, that has helped to raise my distaste for the religion and to consider islam inhumane and unnatural. I dont get why 'God' would make me a 'demon' of me just because of my sexual lusts. What the hell did I do to deserve that. My sexual desires I believe are natural; I can recall feelings and experiences at a very young age in relation to sexual attraction towards other males. Would God make me the way I am just so he can then despise me and send me to eternal hellfire? Thats ridiculous.

    I hope over time I can explore this issue further on this forum. I hope you and others can help me with that. I think that will help my understanding of my own self.

    Mowgli
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #10 - December 19, 2009, 01:37 AM
    Sounds about right to me.. at least you have not been weak enough to cave into Islam and live the life of a lie, rather than just acting it.  It happens to so many who end up marrying women, and not only destroying their own life, but that of the woman and potential children too.

    btw do you prefer a mac or a pc?
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #11 - December 19, 2009, 03:50 AM
    Great name, Mowgli! And great story about how you got it  grin12

    The Jungle Book is my favourite Disney flick, grew up watching it over and over again  Afro

    Welcome to the forum mate.

    "we can smell traitors and country haters"


    Quote from: arX on May 01, 2011, 03:33 AM
    God is Love.
    Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.

  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #12 - December 19, 2009, 04:12 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 01:18 AM
    Thanks Kafirist.

    I dont honestly know what, if any, the link is between my sexual desires and my rejection of islam. Its something I have thought about alot.

    My gut instinct is that as my sexuality is considered a deviancy, that has helped to raise my distaste for the religion and to consider islam inhumane and unnatural. I dont get why 'God' would make me a 'demon' of me just because of my sexual lusts. What the hell did I do to deserve that. My sexual desires I believe are natural; I can recall feelings and experiences at a very young age in relation to sexual attraction towards other males. Would God make me the way I am just so he can then despise me and send me to eternal hellfire? Thats ridiculous.

    I hope over time I can explore this issue further on this forum. I hope you and others can help me with that. I think that will help my understanding of my own self.

    Mowgli


    *hugs* It is great to see another member of the queer team jump onboard.

    Your sexuality isn't a disorder - your Muslim friends and family hate gays because it transgresses their fixed gender stereotypes; their view of the world is of a definite black and white, to view a gay person is almost a slap in their face and challenges their absolutism. As much as you may dislike what they say - you have to remember that they're merely a product of their environment. What you're feeling regarding sexuality isn't the result of divine hocus-pocus but generations of conditioning.
    "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." - Muhammad Ali
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #13 - December 19, 2009, 06:47 AM
    @ IsLame: your so funny! Afro the same here: Why is my head ringing with the tune 'bare necessities'?  Cheesy

    I love that movie too, my kids love them. Their bedroom have that Disney flick as a theme.... Oops, did I reveal too much!

    Welcome Mowgli, and sexuality is the most private thing even freeking Allah should not put his nose in. Afro
    ...
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #14 - December 19, 2009, 07:38 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 18, 2009, 11:41 PM
    hello folks.
    Just a short hello from me.  Smiley

    I live in London, and am of Pakistani origin. I have been raised in the UK in a conservative muslim family. My life has been one massive public lie. I pass myself off in the real world as a regular goody-goody muslim family guy. The truth of the matter, is very different:

    1. Inside, despite my 'act', I am very happy to share with you that I am not a muslim and have never truly ever been. I renounce my religion. I hereby declare that I do not believe in Allah nor Mohammad. I do not believe in the Quran. (Writing this feels so so bloody good...why didn't I do this years ago!)

    2. I am gay. I am sexually attracted to males, and have been since my earliest sexual memories. I have been having closeted gay sexual experiences for many years, and continue to do so.

    I hope this forum is an outlet for me to be my true-self and not have to conform to others' expectations on religion and sexuality. I look forward to some good conversation and hopefully making some friends.

    Love
    Mowgli

    ps the name Mowgli was given to me by a male 'massage' guy who I used to visit in my late teens. He gave nicknames to all his clients. When he set  his eyes upon this happy slim dark youth in nothing but red undies, the choice of nickname was easy grin12

    Hi Mowgli. Welcome the the forum. Nobody here is going to care if you're gay, except for Allat. She's one of our admins and she's massively homophobic. Watch out for her. Smiley
    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #15 - December 19, 2009, 07:45 AM
    She also hates apostates.
    Quote from: thinkfree on September 28, 2010, 07:58 PM
    Iblis has mad debaterin' skillz. Best not step up unless you're prepared to recieve da pain.

  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #16 - December 19, 2009, 07:46 AM
    Quote from: osmanthus on December 19, 2009, 07:38 AM
    Hi Mowgli. Welcome the the forum. Nobody here is going to care if you're gay, except for Allat. She's one of our admins and she's massively homophobic. Watch out for her. Smiley


    Ummm hello?! You were not supposed to tell everyone about my closeted homophobia.  finmad

     parrot

    Welcome Mowgli, please ignore everyone else on this board except for me.  signmuahaha

    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 12:00 AM
    (as far as I know Islam does not directly offend LGBTs)


    Are you serious?
    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #17 - December 19, 2009, 09:02 AM
    Hiall

    Thanks so mych for your kind welcome. I hardly slept last night, I was so happy to have finally outed myself from both closets!  It felt so wonderful. Look forward to getting to know you, even the scary homophobic ones  Afro

    And sorry if have ruined your memories of the Jungle Book. Netx time your with kids watching the movie, I hope you don't up with strange images of me!!

    By the way,I should clarify one thing, I am married with kids! I love them all. So its gonna be a bumpy life ahead one way or another.

    Mowgli.

    ps Im a PC man
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #18 - December 19, 2009, 09:05 AM
    Mowgli, nevermind those posts... Allat is on of the many sweet people here, and they are many.... Ehim, ehim!

    Hey, isn't everybody on earth even the straitest of the straits are homosexuals some how, or sometimes? Well..... if they masturbate, then they're having same sex experience, right?.... So are they homosexuals (same sex), or should I say more approperiately perhabs, Autosexuals? Cheesy

    LOL, I am not gay but I play with a penis sometimes, although it is my penis! : D
    ...
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #19 - December 19, 2009, 09:10 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 09:02 AM

    By the way,I should clarify one thing, I am married with kids! I love them all. So its gonna be a bumpy life ahead one way or another.


    Oh, so is it more like bisexual then? I mean, I am sorry to enquire and you don't have to answer,  do have any sexuall feelings for your wife?
    ...
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #20 - December 19, 2009, 09:20 AM
    Quote from: RIBS on December 19, 2009, 09:10 AM
    do have any sexuall feelings for your wife?

    You could ask exactly the same question of a lot of heterosexual men.  Cheesy
    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #21 - December 19, 2009, 09:32 AM
    Quote from: allat on December 19, 2009, 07:46 AM
    Ummm hello?! You were not supposed to tell everyone about my closeted homophobia.  finmad

     parrot

    Welcome Mowgli, please ignore everyone else on this board except for me.  signmuahaha

    Are you serious?

    Yep, there are stories of Lot, but some Muslims say that was not to do with homophobia as such but more to do with their bohemian lifestyle.  If you have any anti-gay Quranic quotes, let me have them ..
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #22 - December 19, 2009, 09:38 AM
    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 01:37 AM
    Sounds about right to me.. at least you have not been weak enough to cave into Islam and live the life of a lie, rather than just acting it.  It happens to so many who end up marrying women, and not only destroying their own life, but that of the woman and potential children too.

    btw do you prefer a mac or a pc?

    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 09:02 AM

    By the way,I should clarify one thing, I am married with kids! I love them all. So its gonna be a bumpy life ahead one way or another.


     015
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  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #23 - December 19, 2009, 09:50 AM
    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 09:32 AM
    Yep, there are stories of Lot, but some Muslims say that was not to do with homophobia as such but more to do with their bohemian lifestyle.  If you have any anti-gay Quranic quotes, let me have them ..


    Many Muslim women say that Islam liberates women, so? Maybe it liberates them individually in some way from something (or so they are led to believe), but it's quite obvious to most people that Islam has a lot of sexism/misogyny built in. There are some gay people from Muslim backgrounds who wish to continue to self-identify as Muslim and they are finding very creative ways of reconciling the 2. I wish them well, but if you look at Quran and Hadiths, it's quite clear what Islam's stance on homosexuality is.

    Some links:
    http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/Quran/gay/long.html
    (In some circles, the verses of Lut are taken to mean that it was Allah's punishment for their "lewdness" and not their gayness that caused Him to y'know go all genocidal (again), but first of all, this verse is kinda hard to deflect "7:81 Lo! ye come with lust unto men instead of women. Nay, but ye are wanton folk." and secondly, what the hell is "lewdness"? For most homophobic/internalized homophobic LGBT Muslims, it usually means, don't come out of the closet, don't talk about being gay, don't be in a gay relationship, and especially don't go around marching on the streets demanding/celebrating your rights.)

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_topics_and_Islam
    http://www.religioustolerance.org/hom_isla.htm
    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #24 - December 19, 2009, 11:10 AM
    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 09:32 AM
    Yep, there are stories of Lot, but some Muslims say that was not to do with homophobia as such but more to do with their bohemian lifestyle.  If you have any anti-gay Quranic quotes, let me have them ..


    Nah, they are against homosexuality and people having sex with others of the same sex.  Those who say it is otherwise are being dishonest with themselves.  You can read that Lot was actually prepared to give his daughters to the men to rape so that they would not touch the angels (who were male)...
    "Modern man's great illusion has been to convince himself that of all that has gone before he represents the zenith of human accomplishment, but can't summon the mental powers to read anything more demanding than emoticons. Fascinating. "

    One very horny Turk I met on the net.
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #25 - December 19, 2009, 11:14 AM
    Quote from: RIBS on December 19, 2009, 09:10 AM
    Oh, so is it more like bisexual then? I mean, I am sorry to enquire and you don't have to answer,  do have any sexuall feelings for your wife?


    No problem.., actually I love the attention!  grin12

    The truth is I love my wife, in a human caring family way.

    However sexually, I am much more attracted to males...that's just the way it is. I have 'tried' not to be, but failed miserably!! So now I just accept who I am and enjoy it!

  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #26 - December 19, 2009, 11:15 AM
    Quote from: IsLame on December 19, 2009, 09:38 AM
    015


    Oops!

     whistling2
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #27 - December 19, 2009, 11:18 AM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 11:14 AM
    No problem.., actually I love the attention!  grin12

    The truth is I love my wife, in a human caring family way.

    However sexually, I am much more attracted to males...that's just the way it is. I have 'tried' not to be, but failed miserably!! So now I just accept who I am and enjoy it!




    My respects to you for being honest with yourself and your true feelings.  Not all people have the strength to do that.  Some never do.  My thoughts are also with your loved ones, especially your wife and children, as this could be hard to take for them (if you have been hiding it, but I don't know) and may they accept you for who you are.
    "Modern man's great illusion has been to convince himself that of all that has gone before he represents the zenith of human accomplishment, but can't summon the mental powers to read anything more demanding than emoticons. Fascinating. "

    One very horny Turk I met on the net.
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #28 - December 19, 2009, 11:29 AM
    Welcome mowgli.  Smiley
    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Re: Hello from Mowgli
     Reply #29 - December 19, 2009, 12:15 PM
    Quote from: Mowgli on December 19, 2009, 11:14 AM
    No problem.., actually I love the attention!  grin12

    The truth is I love my wife, in a human caring family way.

    Does she have an inkling or suspicion?  Do you ever want to separate, or would you prefer to keep it under wraps for the sake of her & your children?  I know someone who did the same thing once - everyone at work was surprised to find out he was gay when he left his wife and children..
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