I've seen this thread around previously and I'm not sure exactly why, but I thought it's about time I stated what I've gained from being on here.
I was never a hardline muslim - so making the progression to a non-practcing Muslim, something I must attribute to my presence on this forum, for me wasn't so difficult. So for example I prayed very infrequently - I would only usually perform Isha (the night prayer) but not regularly but I always fasted and gave Zakaat. I was however very passionate about my faith and therefore would engage in debate about Islam. Of course these days I have a very non-literal, non-classical interpretation of Islam and believe it only belongs in the past.
The main reason for me adjusting my views was due to what a classical interpretation of the Qur'an says about people who do not beleive i.e. that they will be sentenced to torture in the afterlife. I had already apostated in my teens because of this very reason but I guess I craved faith and a meaning to life in my early twenties and decided to come back to religion. Although ignorance can be bliss, things were not always so comfortable for me. There were people I worked with etc. that I knew were good people and I found it difficult to come to terms with the fact that my religion says these people probably would be tortured in the afterlife for not beleiving. I felt an underlying guilt because of this and this caused me to distant myself from non-Muslims - not because I had any ill-feeling toward them (on the contrary I very much liked them) but because of the underlying guilt I felt. I was quite a reserved guy anyway to begin with - but this made it difficult for me to interact with anyone. People thought I was a pleasant guy but I think they always thought I was a bit odd for being so distant and even reclusive - but if I'm being honest I didn't mind. What ate away at me over the years however, is the fact when I saw a small non-Muslim child in the street, and then thought to myself this beautiful child will probably grow up as a non-beleiver and then go to hell - this was really difficult for me and generally quite upsetting.
Since I've changed my views regarding Islam, I no longer feel these things. I can speak more freely with the non-Muslims around me without feeling that inhibition or guilt. And I can walk down the street and smile at strangers - I smile at people more often now. So if I'm grateful to this forum for anything - it's that by engaging in discussion and debate it has forced me to address these beliefs and stop ignoring them. This has led me to radically change my beleifs and as a consequence relieved me of the divisive effects of classical Islam.
Very beautifully written Abu Yunus. It made me cry. In my briefs.
Topic: What have you learned during your stay on COEM?