Wow hello everyone! This is overwhelming
Thanks for the parrot
I will take good care of it. What is it called? I'll call him Rachid (I call everything Rachid, if there is an actual Rachid around here I hope I didn't offend you xD)
Welcome feryel! I've joined quite recently as well, so my story is still fresh on the intro board. I don't know how this will make you feel, but you share hobbies with my Muslim husband! Of course, he's not a woman, so things have played out very differently for him...
In any case, you share struggles with countless members on here. Personally, I can attest to how painful it is to return home after enjoying the independence of studying someplace far, far away from your parents. It's no joke.
I read your intro post before actually ^^ Where you born into Islam too?
Come on dude. I'm from Sweden, not Switzerland
And I thought the Switzerland/Sweden confusion was a cliché xD I'm not even offended, Sweden seems cool, you had vikings and badass metal bands \m/
Hey and welcome, fellow North-African and metal fan
Yeaah! I only ever meet fellow Maghrebis (is that a word? Well it is now) that judge me for my music taste, looks and say I'm not "one of them" or "a real one" because I look "too Swiss", whatever that means ^^' Do you live in your country of origin or elsewhere?
Welcome!
Your comments about parental attitudes are thought provoking. I thought many people emigrated to get a better life!
I do not believe it was only about economics, but also freedom from theses restrictions you so eloquently describe!
So I am really puzzled!
My extended family contains fundies but also normal people, and I just do not believe these stories I read about homogenous families.
So is it possible to have some real attitudes of families to religion, or is this a very biased segment here who are experiencing a hard time?Or has a whole very large segment morphed into attitudes they themselves did not hold?
I think each family is different. In my case, my Northern African father came from a poor family, got the opportunity to study abroad, met my Swiss mother, they somehow fell in love and got married (what happened before that, only God, if he exists, knows xD) and decided to live in Switzerland because it was simpler job-wise and pretty much everything else. Since my father left his family and country to get married, he seems to be very scared of losing his identity. He always insisted on how important it was for their kids to grow up muslims. Also I should mention that I am an only child, so way to put all the pressure on me. He is considered very "moderate", but that doesn't make it any easier since he always brings out the "I am a very tolerant and moderate father, you should be greatful that I am not like others, but I will NEVER be a EUROPEAN father" argument, because Europeans are so evil, letting their girls have boyfriends and go out and stuff ^^'
The worst is I get where he's coming from. I actually found myself emulating just that when I once tried to be with someone who was 100% European, I thought about the future and how I would feel left out of my own family if I were the only one to not eat pork, fasting during Ramadan and the kids where raised without religion. It made me feel anxious and sad, because at that time I was convinced religion was part of who I was and my identity. I didn't want to change it for anyone or compromise anything because I would be betraying myself. I'll probably put this issue in another topic. Lately I'm really questioning who has been a bigger influence in my life. I always thought I had to "fight" against western influence and stay true to myself, but I really don't know anymore...
Some people from muslim countries who go to other countries might not think much of religion and not see it as so important for their identity. These are the ones that enjoy the freedoms western countries have to offer and I admit I used to look down on them, especially if they where fellow Maghrebis who always tell me how "Swiss" I am looking and I thought "how dare they tell me this, when they are living their student lives getting drunk, having sex and behaving like everyone else". It's ironic how my people view me as so Europeanised when I am having issues they might not even have themselves, because most people from Maghrebi countries at universities come from richer families that can afford to send their sons and daughters to good high schools and to unis abroad. From what I observed, richer families tend to be more liberal.
Maybe I digress, but I'm starting to think religion raised me to be a massive hipster xD
Welcome! Bienvenue! Willkommen im dieser neuer Welt! (did I get that right? :-P). Yeah from what I can gather, it's much tougher to live as a Muslim for women, especially if you question it even slightly.... But glad to see you've broken away!
Yeah
(close enough, it's "in dieser neuen Welt" but German grammar is impossible
)
Well there is the very-hard-to-ignore restriction that you can only marry Muslim men. Also even though I never wore the hijab, there are the comments on what you wear (strangely enough metal shirt never were a problem. As long as I am unattractive, it's fine xD). I am pretty sure if I had been a guy I wouldn't have gotten the same reactions when only even mentioning the name of a male human at home... And I was explicitly told that because I'm a girl I am not to live on my own before I get married. In the end I managed to go abroad for a semester but I had to pretend that "I had no choice, I tried to find an internship closer to home but I found nothing and it's mandatory, so..." and it wasn't an easy discussion to have.
ArielT: No it's a fake name, but I once drew a character that had this name because I found it pretty =D Where do you live? As for the country, mine is huge but somehow manages to be invisible to everyone because rarely someone knows where it is!
It's ridiculous whenever I have to decline a female friend's offer to sleep over and they say "What does he think? That I am gay and that we are going to do sexual things together? xD" and I can only tell them to not even bother trying to understand because it's not even about that, it just doesn't make sense at all! ^^''
Topic: Greetings from Switzerland!