I was reminded of my colour today
Reply #32 - October 04, 2014, 10:25 PM
Wow, there have been more kind and thoughtful words on this thread than I was ever expecting.
I'm sorry if I miss anyone who has taken the time to read and respond to my attention-seeking gripe, but a Big Thanks to Cato (hope you're ok old friend), Yeezus, uber-happy Lily (I will focus on the good thanks, and will let him know that all cultures have both good and bad bits), Nikolaj (you're too nice to me, and I'm pretty sure I don't deserve all of that), Qtain (good idea about cricket dude, though I'm an England fan, I'll give my son the choice to support his grandad's team), the lovely suki (where are you from? I'm compiling a list of places where people are particularly vicious and thick) asbie (the even lovelier grandmaster in our midst), Bosnian lua (is there any good tv from Pakistan? If there is, I'll do it),
and Three: I think you may have hit the nail on the head. I may just be overreacting; he could just be wanting to conform to the majority. It reminds me of when I was about 8. I used to compete regularly for a prize given to the best student in the class, with a girl called Nicola. God I loved her brain, but disliked her slightly whenever she beat me to the weekly Mars bar. I remember having the loveliest dream one night, where Nicola and I were skipping through a field, hand in hand, and we were so happy together. We ended up in my house, and Nicola stayed for tea and we were like an old married couple. I remember waking up and the happiness stayed with me for a while, and I seriously started considering trying to make that dream become a reality. It took about 10 minutes before it slowly dawned on me that the dream could never be reality. I was different. My culture was different. My parents were different. My religion was different. My poor, inner city surroundings were different. My skin was different. Everything about me was different. Although significant, I remember taking this realisation in my stride, shrugging it off, shrugging the dream off, and just getting on with my breakfast, with thoughts of getting on with trying to win the week's Mars bar. Perhaps my son is dealing with something similar in his head? On the plus side, the gulf between mine and Nicola's cultures was vast. I believe the difference between my son and his Amy is much more superficial, and therefore easier to bridge. I just hope we get to a stage one day where one of my descendants doesn't have any gap to bridge whatsoever, so that his father doesn't lay awake at night, sharing his thoughts on a forum, wanting his four-year-old to be accepted just like every other four-year-old. The sooner the better IMO.
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Topic: I was reminded of my colour today