Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?

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- shu-cream
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
OP - August 21, 2015, 09:22 AM

(I dunno where to post this, so......)

I see a lot of courageous people here. Either you have it tough and you left head strong (Shout out to BerberElla T.T) , or you intelligent blokes discovered the absurdities early on, having deep knowledge of the texts.. (Hassan, I stumbled upon your story here first. You're my inspiration!)

I've read quiet a few stories here but I might have missed a lot more..
I want to know how you've found your Inner Resolution to leave this twisted religion for good. (or avoid it altogether)

Please share with me your stories or links to them.
Things like how you leave, the consequences you face, and how you're doing now..

You see, I've googled here, but I get sidetracked so fast. Getting stuck at appealing posts that don't exactly help my dilemma.

I desperately need inspiration and motivation to strengthen my resolution!
And prolly more knowledge too, I NEEDS THEMM...

***
(Rant coming up!)

I'm a coward, a chicken. And a slow learner too..
So make that a Dumb-Chicken.

My parents aren't exactly as strict as some of the people here. Nobody is pushing me to be more 'devoutly' because that's how I was, and my 'devoutness' seems enough for everyone.

And that's how people think I still am, much like a lot of the closeted ex-muslims here.

Ignorance is Bliss..
It was so easy to be devout when I was ignorant. Blindly follow, cherry pick things I like, and finding some excuse to cover up the bad ones.
I've also seen people around me rebelling. Muslimahs not wearing hijab, or people purposely not praying. And I thought, "Sucks to be you, I'm going to Paradise" ... *shivers* I hate you, Dumb-Chicken...!

Knowledge is Challenging!
Once you see it, you can't UNSEE it. And why didn't I see it earlier?!!
The SUCKy one was actually ME...!
I've started educating myself, slowly.. (dammit chicken brain!!)

Now it's getting harder to act devoutly. I try to show people that I still pray. I tried letting my hair out a few times and it feels soo gooood. I still wear hijab most of the time but I've stopped thinking like the Dumb-Chicken that I was.

But it's tiring to act, tired of getting praying advices, tired of reading chainmails like "the (absurd) habits of the prophet that I should follow" or like "pokemon is evil and jewish shit"
.. I want out! OUT I tell you, OUT!

..but

The Dumb-Chicken is scared. It doesn't mind being fed shit. Because being out is...too scary..
I'm still in the process of beating out the Dumbness, and the Chickenness of this Dumb-Chicken..

O' Courageous Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways!

Sincerely,
Shu the Dumb Chicken
- Quod Sum Eris
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
Reply #1 - August 21, 2015, 10:30 AM

Welcome. Are you in a country where being open about leaving islam has legal implications and/or rabid mob violence?

Edit: Just seen your last post on the intro thread. Sorry, I didn't remember you.

`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.'
`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
`You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
- shu-cream
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
Reply #2 - August 21, 2015, 12:34 PM

Quote from: Quod Sum Eris on August 21, 2015, 10:30 AM
Welcome. Are you in a country where being open about leaving islam has legal implications and/or rabid mob violence?

Edit: Just seen your last post on the intro thread. Sorry, I didn't remember you.

Thanks!

I'm from a secular country where you're free to practice any religion but getting out of Islam is almost impossible. Plus, some states are starting to implement the sharia law.

Mob violence might ensue if I'm open in the social media but maybe not as crazy as certain countries...

My father is kinda well known as an imam in his circle, being called ustaz. He's even more crazy since he married his new wife. (He believes he is the closest to god now)
I know they both'd be against my apostasy..

Meh. I'm the one who should apologise. I've been incognito for so long. I'm like the being that sees what the people do here and records their deeds secretly, a Major Stalker!
- Ishtar90
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
Reply #3 - August 21, 2015, 03:35 PM

Hello dear, I don't believe I've said hi to you before

First of all, you are way too harsh with yourself. It's okay to be scared. It's okay to be confused. I stayed in a state of confusion and sadness for years, I was too scared to let go. "What if I'm wrong and I go to hell?" was always lurking in my head. It wasn't an easy process. In my case there were a lot of tears, a lot of depression and a lot of anxiety. You can read my story in the intro thread if you'd like.

One of my biggest fears was hell. There is an excellent post about debunking hell on the forum I'd recommend you read fully, it will definitely help. http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?topic=24124.0

Give yourself some credit, the fact that you're here to ask questions and gain knowledge is proof that you're not a Dumb-Chicken

You are the Universe, Expressing itself as a Human for a little while- Eckhart Tolle
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
Reply #4 - August 21, 2015, 04:27 PM

Welcome to the forum shu-cream!

I'm not sure about the exact details of your situation and why you feel you can't get out of Islam. I think for many the initial step was to assert their own independence, away from influences that insulate one in the Islamic mindset. From there it's simply a matter of building for oneself the kind of life that you want. Having family and other influences around makes it a lot harder. I wish you the best of luck in doing so, feel free to chat with us all here about how it goes, and I think that if you're in a secular country you could very possibly live your own life.

Quote from: yeezevee on February 11, 2016, 02:05 PM
how fuck works without shit??

Let's Play Chess!

harakaat, friend, RIP
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Leaving for Good. Members of CEMB, Teach Me Your Ways?
Reply #5 - August 24, 2015, 03:56 PM

Quote from: shu-cream on August 21, 2015, 12:34 PM
Meh. I'm the one who should apologise. I've been incognito for so long. I'm like the being that sees what the people do here and records their deeds secretly, a Major Stalker!

Lol Well if nothing else that last bit gave me a laugh and like the others say, don't be so hard on yourself Shu, think of all the 'Dumb Chickens' who spend their entire lives as dumb chickens from the craddle to the grave, you've broken the mold so kudos to you.
I hope you stick around, there seems to be a strange trend by members from your part of the world to join up, tap out a few posts and then disapear like smoke in the wind.
Now I'm off to give you an offical (all be it belated) welcome on your intro thread.
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