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Theme Changer

 Topic: Introduction

 (Read 4208 times)
  • 1« Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Introduction
     OP - March 07, 2016, 04:53 AM

    Hello Everyone,

    I became a member a few days ago, but have been reading posts for a few weeks. What an interesting and stimulating forum, apart from which we also seem to be saving lives. I'd like to, where I can and where wanted, add my voice to those who support others going through the experience of reclaiming their minds. I'm also interested in reclaiming our bodies and reclaiming our lives. For now, I want to write mainly on "apostasy" (in inverted commas for a reason) as this is closest to my heart at the moment. I do have a blog, but it's probably not etiquette to provide the link in an introduction. So I'll share that later. My profile says enough.

    In terms of history, I left religion 37 years ago, having been brought up Muslim. Thankfully, for me the experience of leaving Islam was a positive one. At 22, I sat my parents down and told them calmly and directly that I no longer have a religion. My mum accepted it immediately without any reservations at all. My dad oohed and aahed a bit over how people will know "what kind of person you are." He found it pretty much impossible to conceptualise anyone without their religious bracket, as if you can't be a human being without having some or other religion. For about a month he tried to semi-subtly urge me back to Islam, but then gave up.

    We had the misfortune of living up the road from the mosque, which meant that whenever some luminary came to town, a drone army fanned out to knock on doors and invite the faithful to a special sermon that night. It was the next time that this happened and I happened to answer the door, that I learned of my father's acceptance of my decision. The bearded ones at the door greeted me politely and asked my name (I still had my original name). When I told them, there were many Masha-Allahs and many outstretched hands (Islam in Cape Town at the time was somewhat like that in Bosnia, pretty laid-back). I responded to their invitation by saying: "Thank you, but I thought only Muslims were invited to such things." Startled, they said, "But you are a Muslim," to which I replied that I am not. "But, but, your name is Muslim," came several holy splutters. I then proceeded to lecture them on how a name doesn't have a religion and mentioned several names that defied their logic, like Amine and Bachir Gemayel, Lebanese Christians who were all over the news at the time. Did they think these men were Muslim? By this point a minor turbulence was beginning to form on our doorstep, at which point my dad appeared beside me wearing his religious cap.
    "Salam-alaikum" he said. They greeted back and in panic asked,
    "Is this your child?"
    "Yes," said my father.
    "Have you heard what she just said?"
    "Yes," said my father.
    The minor turbulence was now a major one. The oldest of the visitors, who'd been standing quietly to the side throughout rubbing his beard, now spoke.
    "Will you join us in the mosque tonight, insha-Allah?" he asked my father.
    "Insha-Allah, I will be there," said my father.
    A cacophony of "Alhamdulilla!", "Insha-Allah!" and "Masha-Allah!" followed, whereupon the turbaned ones beat a hasty retreat.
    When I looked to my side, my dad had already gone back into the house. He never referred to this incident ever again and I respected his space. Thus did I know that my dad, too, had accepted. The only two sad things are that my father died ten years ago, and Islam there has become ugly, very ugly indeed.

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #1 - March 07, 2016, 08:18 AM

    37+22 = 59?

    That must be very long journey, 37 years!

    Welcome!  parrot

    Also, you can put your blog link in your signature.  dance
  • Introduction
     Reply #2 - March 07, 2016, 10:03 AM

    welcome  parrot ur father sounds lovely, may he rest in peace…ur lucky that both ur parents accepted ur apostasy.
  • Introduction
     Reply #3 - March 07, 2016, 12:59 PM

    Welcome  parrot
  • Introduction
     Reply #4 - March 07, 2016, 01:01 PM

    Welcome to the forum BuraqRentalsInc, have a rabbit!  bunny

    I'm glad you've had a very positive experience with leaving Islam. I'm happy to say that mine has been very similar. I'm not sure that Helaine's math is correct here, as there may have been a period, even a lengthy one in which you had been an apostate but not yet told your parents. Regardless, you still are an experienced one, by this forums standards.  grin12

    I hope to hear more from you, and know you can offer something to stimulate and interest.  Smiley

    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Introduction
     Reply #5 - March 08, 2016, 01:33 AM

     parrot Welcome!

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Introduction
     Reply #6 - March 08, 2016, 05:06 AM

    I liked your father's response. The meeting at the door was a prime situation to bring out the "dirty laundry" with agitators doubling as a support group at hand. He kept family and personal issues just that. Often leaving any faith which is heavily community centered the community itself becomes involved as if part of an extended family
  • Introduction
     Reply #7 - March 11, 2016, 07:06 AM

    37+22 = 59?

    That must be very long journey, 37 years!

    Welcome!  parrot

    Also, you can put your blog link in your signature.  dance


    Thank you.  Smiley Actually, the journey was only 6 years: from 16 to 22. I've asked about the signature and got some advice, but I still can't get access to it. Thanks all the same.

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #8 - March 11, 2016, 07:12 AM

    welcome  parrot ur father sounds lovely, may he rest in peace…ur lucky that both ur parents accepted ur apostasy.


    Thank you  Smiley Yes, my dad was an interesting guy. He had his quirks too, just like all of us, I suppose. I understand what you're saying about apostasy and accept your kind sentiment. I do have an issue with allowing a religion to tell me what I am, so I have an issue with calling myself an apostate. You're welcome to read about it here: https://anjulipandavar.wordpress.com/2016/02/21/why-i-am-not-an-apostate/

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #9 - March 11, 2016, 07:13 AM

    Welcome  parrot


    Thank you, puzzlelover  Smiley

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #10 - March 11, 2016, 07:18 AM

    Welcome to the forum BuraqRentalsInc, have a rabbit!  bunny

    I'm glad you've had a very positive experience with leaving Islam. I'm happy to say that mine has been very similar. I'm not sure that Helaine's math is correct here, as there may have been a period, even a lengthy one in which you had been an apostate but not yet told your parents. Regardless, you still are an experienced one, by this forums standards.  grin12

    I hope to hear more from you, and know you can offer something to stimulate and interest.  Smiley


    Thank you very much, asbie  Smiley I'd like to read your story. Is it available online? Thank you also for your kind words. Whether what I have to offer will stimulate and interest you have to judge for yourself, but generally I vent here https://anjulipandavar.wordpress.com/ Perhaps we can debate some stuff.

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #11 - March 11, 2016, 07:29 AM

    I liked your father's response. The meeting at the door was a prime situation to bring out the "dirty laundry" with agitators doubling as a support group at hand. He kept family and personal issues just that. Often leaving any faith which is heavily community centered the community itself becomes involved as if part of an extended family


    Hi bogart,
    Yes, you're right. Thankfully, where I grew up, "family" was much more in the sense of a nuclear family than in the sense of an extended one. We didn't have aunts and uncles in our faces all the time. We tended to only see them on special occasions, and then they didn't play any policing role in our lives.
    Thanks for your kind words about my dad.  Smiley

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #12 - March 11, 2016, 07:30 AM

    parrot Welcome!


    Thank you, three  Smiley

    New general blog, Autonomous Individual, under construction at Freethought Blogs to be launched soon with posts on Pedagogy, Religion, Cities and Marriage Equality. http://freethoughtblogs.com/anjuli
  • Introduction
     Reply #13 - March 11, 2016, 10:34 AM

    Welcome parrot
  • Introduction
     Reply #14 - March 11, 2016, 02:46 PM



    My math was way off.... Sorry  wacko
  • Introduction
     Reply #15 - April 03, 2016, 05:27 PM

    Welcome  parrot
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