Re: Poster of the month!
Reply #1323 - August 07, 2011, 02:01 PM
Friends, Romans, kaffars, murtads, countrymen.
There comes a time in a mans life when he realises that he was not suffering from self-delusion, but is, in fact, a legitimate genius, exactly as he imagined himself to be.
This is one such moment that, undoubtedly, Shakespeare and Einstein also experienced at a point in their careers.
So I don't thank you for this honour. I say, in fact, that you should be grateful to me, for accepting it.
To all my minions who clicked a vote for me, in tribute to my genius, that now has written my name in the firmament of brilliance that illuminates the lives of lesser intellects and souls than I - in other words - the lives of you plebians; I say that you may have redeemed your sordid, wasted lives and gained some humility in recognition of a truly superior brilliance than yours, by voting for me. For that, you have achieved enlightenment amongst the misery of existence.
As peasents, in ancient times, once marvelled at the Collosus of Rhodes, so do you marvel at my superiority and superb excellence in everything, straddling like that Collosus, the city below, the citizens of whom stare up in awe of my straddling.
I bless you with the ointment of my genius. I squirt it on your faces. Close your eyes, as I anoint you with it.
To those who voted for my rivals, remember just one thing.
You can never be on guard all the time. Just as Hamlet eventually killed Claudius, I too shall one day have revenge. This betrayal shall never be forgotten. I shall ensure that you will never sleep easily again. I have in my mind, revenge in the shape of cobras inserted in your bed at night as you sleep, biting your toes, and other such kind of ghoulish, painful and horrible Biblical style assasinations.
To my fellow nominees, many congratulations for achieving the honour of having your name beside mine in this vote. I should imagine for many it will be the highlight of your life, and sadly, shall probably all be downhill from here.
Once again, as you stand before me, like Bonasera before Don Corleone in the opening scene of The Godfather, as you kiss my hand, hoping for my mercy and acceptance, I congratulate you again on your excellent and most honourable decision, to ennoble me.
Kiss my hand again, you are my minions now, all of you.
"we can smell traitors and country haters"
God is Love.
Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.