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 Topic: Berbs Blog, much madness within

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  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #300 - March 23, 2008, 12:24 PM
    Quote from: diotima on March 23, 2008, 11:56 AM
    Quote from: Wise Haven on March 23, 2008, 11:34 AM
    Quote from: King Tut on March 23, 2008, 01:16 AM
    Now am confused wise heaven! are you male of female?


    Victim of women with PMS  Cry Not a sufferer of PMS  wacko (subtle difference)

    Despite physical violence with fists, nails and knives - I still remain sympathetic.  Roll Eyes


    Oh, goodness!!  wacko

    Am much too good a girl, I always knew it!  Cheesy

    Hah! - you say you are a good girl  Shocked

    Can you do that aura of menace thing  - where you don't even have to be facing the person to radiate malevolence  wacko
    That is creepy...........it hits you even when in a different room "beware, run away, danger awaits"
    That happy night was worth them a'
    Amang the rigs wi' Annie.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #301 - March 23, 2008, 12:29 PM
    Quote
    Hah! - you say you are a good girl  Shocked

    Oh, I AM a good girl... and there´s good and good.  Wink (hehehe... am flirt-deprived, sorry!  whistling2 )

    Quote
    Can you do that aura of menace thing  - where you don't even have to be facing the person to radiate malevolence  wacko

    well... everyone can radiate malevolence and bad vibes... my mum always tells me I can make a face like a devil... but that´s just because my mimic is as transparent as water...everyone always knows what I think or feel, I believe... but mostly, I love peace and harmony. At worst, I grrrr.... and even that won´t take long, usually. If I am handled properly. dance
    Quote
    That is creepy...........it hits you even when in a different room "beware, run away, danger awaits"

    yep, that IS creepy... beware of such people!
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #302 - March 24, 2008, 08:33 PM
    Quote from: Wise Haven on March 23, 2008, 11:34 AM
    Quote from: King Tut on March 23, 2008, 01:16 AM
    Now am confused wise heaven! are you male of female?


    Victim of women with PMS  Cry Not a sufferer of PMS  wacko (subtle difference)

    Despite physical violence with fists, nails and knives - I still remain sympathetic.  Roll Eyes


    thats sexy what you complaining about it? theres nothing like a woman grabbing your balls and pulling them really hard! only real man can handle that sort of thing.
    Left the forum: http://www.councilofexmuslims.com/index.php?topic=22997
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #303 - March 24, 2008, 09:30 PM
    hows the gym going berb?
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #304 - March 25, 2008, 09:41 AM
    Gyms going great Bloss, I am surprised my P is coping with this excess activity lol but it is and I am enjoying it.

    I am off to a yoga/pilates thing at 10.30 and then back to the gym at 2pm, so I am all booked up for the day.

    I got a bit of a telling off from the personal instructor last Thursday for doing too much, he said that I can't speed ahead like that if I want to see the results that I want I have to stick to the way they are telling me to do it, whereas I wanted to feel the burn and what they gave to me to do barely hurts anymore.

    So anyway I have to slow down for now they said otherwise I will plateau too fast whatever that means.  Roll Eyes
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Giving up
     Reply #305 - March 25, 2008, 09:51 AM
    I was supposed to write an updated statement for court and file it last week, but I never did.  Everytime I tried to write one up I didn't see the point anymore.

    I want to give up and just get on with my life.  Let him see the kids and just let go of the battle.

    What is the point in fighting when they care nothing for what I say, they said the violence wasn't enough, they say that my sons behaviour is not enough on it's own, and I wonder deep down whether my ex is really responsible solely for the way my son is?  I mean some say it's genetic, some say it's what happens in the childs life, I think it's both and I just can't blame him completely for all of it.

    Don't get me wrong I hate him, I know that he will get in their heads but I can't even prove that, nor would it matter to the court.  All that matters is what the kids want and the kinds want to see their faith.

    My son asked me what would be the end result if I won at court so I told him, and he burts in to tears, how can I tear him apart like this?  what is once every two weeks?  I am still the main carer and I hope my values will be enough.

    I risk making my children resent me enough that they may be more drawn to him in the lon term.

    Far better to just let them see him properly so that they can see for themselves over time what it took me time to see too.

    Of course I am terrified that he will try to kill me once the kids say can we have a bacon sandwich, or my son says "my mother told me the quran was just a book of old myths that people were foolish enough to believe in once", but no court will ever stop access based on religion, so what is the point in fighting?

    They believe him when he says he will never do anything to me, I don't but they do, so why write a statement when all my statements before meant nothing?

    I quit, let the access continue, let it just settle, let's see what comes next.

    I am tired of fighting a losing battle and worrying all the time.  Cry
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #306 - March 25, 2008, 10:20 AM
    Sounds reasonable. Just keep an eye on the sod for any nastiness and don't sweat the details. Kids always want access to both parents, even if they know they aren't perfect. Just being a better person than him is your best bet in the long run and will save you aggro with the courts, at least for now. If he goes apeshit later they'll have to take that into account. Have you any legal protection at all, like an AVO* or something similar?

    *Apprehended Violence Order
    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #307 - March 25, 2008, 10:28 AM
    good to hear the gym going well berbs Afro I know that if you go to regular and do to much it can have an adverse effect, where as instead of toning up the muscles they start to break down, though not completly, which is due to not giving your muscles time to recover and rebuild, when you exercise you cause the muscles to stretch and have little tears, this is what causes muscle soarness as soon as an hour or two after a workout, and after the (cant remember name) acid has gone, thats why they advise a 48hr break between full body workouts or individual area workouts, as this allows the muscles to recover and rebuild. but keep it up berbs Afro
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #308 - March 25, 2008, 10:33 AM
    why not look at access via a centre, until they reach teenage years? I know thats along way off for the two youngest but it would stop too much influence on them
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #309 - March 25, 2008, 11:24 AM
    Quote from: osmanthus on March 25, 2008, 10:20 AM
    Sounds reasonable. Just keep an eye on the sod for any nastiness and don't sweat the details. Kids always want access to both parents, even if they know they aren't perfect. Just being a better person than him is your best bet in the long run and will save you aggro with the courts, at least for now. If he goes apeshit later they'll have to take that into account. Have you any legal protection at all, like an AVO* or something similar?

    *Apprehended Violence Order


    Not quite, I have some sort of lame promise  Roll Eyes, they got him to sign a paper saying he would do nothing, but it's not an order, even though they assure me if he breaks it he will be in trouble.

    When I go back to court I will demand an order of some sort, because I need to feel a tad safer, I'm just waiting for my crap solictors to phone me back now.

    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 10:28 AM
    good to hear the gym going well berbs Afro I know that if you go to regular and do to much it can have an adverse effect, where as instead of toning up the muscles they start to break down, though not completly, which is due to not giving your muscles time to recover and rebuild, when you exercise you cause the muscles to stretch and have little tears, this is what causes muscle soarness as soon as an hour or two after a workout, and after the (cant remember name) acid has gone, thats why they advise a 48hr break between full body workouts or individual area workouts, as this allows the muscles to recover and rebuild. but keep it up berbs Afro


    That's pretty much the same thing the personal instructor said to me.  Cheesy

    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 10:33 AM
    why not look at access via a centre, until they reach teenage years? I know thats along way off for the two youngest but it would stop too much influence on them


    It will be awhile before the access moves from the centre on to outside access, but they wouldn't go for that, and I don't want that either. 
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #310 - March 25, 2008, 12:28 PM
    I just discussed it all with my solictor, who says that I should write the statement anyway, and explain in my statement the detrimental effect this is having on my mental health, I told him I didn't see the point, but he has convinced me to write it anyway.

    He says he is completely baffled that the judge didn't side with me last time in court, and that everything points to the fact that the judge should be ruling in my favour.  He says that if it continues we will push to move up to a higher a court because this judge may be holding back thanks to the complaint about racism from my ex.

    I still feel like this is pointless, but I will write the statement.

    I have awful short term memory though, I am really going to struggle putting dates to the incidents that have happened since my last statement. wacko
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #311 - March 25, 2008, 12:46 PM
    if your solicitor is baffled by the judges decisions, why is he waiting to see if he carries with his biased actions, how many will it take for your solicitor to act, if it was me Id want clarification on how the judge reached his decision and ask for it to be reviewed.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #312 - March 25, 2008, 12:49 PM
    see I did learn something from GCSE Physical Education, even if I dont do many physical activities! grin12
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #313 - March 25, 2008, 08:50 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 12:46 PM
    if your solicitor is baffled by the judges decisions, why is he waiting to see if he carries with his biased actions, how many will it take for your solicitor to act, if it was me Id want clarification on how the judge reached his decision and ask for it to be reviewed.


    Bloody good point Bloss.  Tongue
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #314 - March 25, 2008, 08:51 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 12:49 PM
    see I did learn something from GCSE Physical Education, even if I dont do many physical activities! grin12


    Ah well though, now you can't use the INFP excuse for no gym, me and Dio are both doing it now and we are INFP's. so get thee to the gym Bloss, it's actually good fun once you get into it.  Smiley
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Youngest brother has run away from home and come to mine
     Reply #315 - March 25, 2008, 08:56 PM
    Yes, yet again a family member has turned up at my door running away from the psychos I call parents.

    My 17yr old brother turned up in the afternoon today, after questioning why he was here he told me my step mother, his natural mother, pulled a knife on him and was holding him with the knife against him threatening to kill him.  I mean he did do something he shouldn't have, but isn't that fucking extreme?

    This is the same woman mind you, who stabbed her own younger brother through the hand with a knife for stealing a few pennies from a blind beggars cup (yes I know it was wrong, but again look how extreme she is?) and left me near dead from a brutal beating.

    The woman is fucking insane  finmad.

    So anyway my brother is with me for a while, he has to decide what he wants to do, he can stay if he wants to, but I can tell by his eyes that he isn't ready to run that far just yet, but it's coming soon.  Roll Eyes
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #316 - March 25, 2008, 08:57 PM
    you live near a city berb, your gym is mamoth compared to the two near me, you 5 people in em and its packed, I aim to get myself a punch bag and a good pair of running shoes, I tried the gym for 6 months, its so boring so gave it up. grin12
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #317 - March 25, 2008, 08:58 PM
    I should add that his arm is cut, and my father had to pull her off my brother.  My brother ran out of the house and hung around crying on the street for a couple of hours, before starting the long journey to my house as the only safe place he knows.

    My younger natural sister lives just round the corner from our parents, yet he chose to come via 2 buses and 2 trains to mine.  Smiley
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #318 - March 25, 2008, 08:59 PM
    all you can do berbs is give support as you are doing now, dont get dragged into it though.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #319 - March 25, 2008, 09:00 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 08:57 PM
    you live near a city berb, your gym is mamoth compared to the two near me, you 5 people in em and its packed, I aim to get myself a punch bag and a good pair of running shoes, I tried the gym for 6 months, its so boring so gave it up. grin12


    God running is too public for me, I can just about handle the few people at the gym, my social anxiety was off the rails today because there were about 10 people at my gym and it was almost too much, let alone running on the street and through parks where so many more people can see me.  Shocked
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Youngest brother has run away from home and come to mine
     Reply #320 - March 25, 2008, 09:00 PM
    Quote from: BerberElla on March 25, 2008, 08:56 PM
    Yes, yet again a family member has turned up at my door running away from the psychos I call parents.

    My 17yr old brother turned up in the afternoon today, after questioning why he was here he told me my step mother, his natural mother, pulled a knife on him and was holding him with the knife against him threatening to kill him.  I mean he did do something he shouldn't have, but isn't that fucking extreme?

    This is the same woman mind you, who stabbed her own younger brother through the hand with a knife for stealing a few pennies from a blind beggars cup (yes I know it was wrong, but again look how extreme she is?) and left me near dead from a brutal beating.

    The woman is fucking insane  finmad.

    So anyway my brother is with me for a while, he has to decide what he wants to do, he can stay if he wants to, but I can tell by his eyes that he isn't ready to run that far just yet, but it's coming soon.  Roll Eyes


    That is insane - do you think she would have stabbed him?

    Is this the same brother who treated you so badly not so long ago?
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #321 - March 25, 2008, 09:00 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 08:59 PM
    all you can do berbs is give support as you are doing now, dont get dragged into it though.


    This is another brother Bloss, not the one you met, I don't want to get dragged in, but I will be anyway.  finmad
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Youngest brother has run away from home and come to mine
     Reply #322 - March 25, 2008, 09:02 PM
    Quote from: cosmicdancer on March 25, 2008, 09:00 PM


    That is insane - do you think she would have stabbed him?

    Is this the same brother who treated you so badly not so long ago?


    I don't know if she would have stabbed him, he is her natural son, but his arm is bleeding where he was trying to protect himself.
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #323 - March 25, 2008, 09:02 PM
    you should take comfort and pride in that berbs, shows you how much he thinks of you, and trusts you.

    my battery goana die in a min, n am still an hour before home finmad
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #324 - March 25, 2008, 09:03 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 09:02 PM
    you should take comfort and pride in that berbs, shows you how much he thinks of you, and trusts you.

    my battery goana die in a min, n am still an hour before home finmad


    Yeah, I feel good to know they run to me, I mean I am the black sheep of the family  Cheesy, they know they can trust me.

    You at work, but not working Bloss?  whistling2
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #325 - March 25, 2008, 09:05 PM
    Quote from: BerberElla on March 25, 2008, 08:58 PM
    My younger natural sister lives just round the corner from our parents, yet he chose to come via 2 buses and 2 trains to mine.  Smiley


    You are the one they run to - you are a good person Berbs and they know it - unfortunately good people also get taken advantage of.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #326 - March 25, 2008, 09:10 PM
    Quote from: BerberElla on March 25, 2008, 12:28 PM
    I just discussed it all with my solictor, who says that I should write the statement anyway, and explain in my statement the detrimental effect this is having on my mental health, I told him I didn't see the point, but he has convinced me to write it anyway.

    He says he is completely baffled that the judge didn't side with me last time in court, and that everything points to the fact that the judge should be ruling in my favour.  He says that if it continues we will push to move up to a higher a court because this judge may be holding back thanks to the complaint about racism from my ex.

    I still feel like this is pointless, but I will write the statement.

    I have awful short term memory though, I am really going to struggle putting dates to the incidents that have happened since my last statement. wacko

    Ok, since you were the one pushing the case and you're half Moroccan how exactly is the problem racism? Sounds like bullshit to me.
    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #327 - March 25, 2008, 09:16 PM
    Quote from: cosmicdancer on March 25, 2008, 09:05 PM


    You are the one they run to - you are a good person Berbs and they know it - unfortunately good people also get taken advantage of.


    They do, but I am not as susceptible to it anymore, I learnt along time to not care about being alone anymore, and that was the only thing that made me so easy to take advantage of, this need for companionship, friends and family at whatever cost.

    My other brother may have taken the piss towards the end, but it was a fast end, I put my foot down and kicked him out in a heartbeat, before I would have given chance after chance, now there are limited chances, and sometimes no chances.

    I am not as forgiving as I once was, I am tougher than I once was, this I think stands me in good stead even if I am alone, it's on my terms and out of choice.

    If this brother tries to take the piss, I will withdraw my generous spirit to his loss, not mine.  Afro
    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #328 - March 25, 2008, 09:35 PM
    Quote from: BerberElla on March 25, 2008, 09:00 PM
    Quote from: blossom76 on March 25, 2008, 08:59 PM
    all you can do berbs is give support as you are doing now, dont get dragged into it though.


    This is another brother Bloss, not the one you met, I don't want to get dragged in, but I will be anyway.  finmad



    I didnt think twas the one I met berbs, as I wouldnt think you'd let him in the house.
  • Re: Berbs Blog, much madness within
     Reply #329 - March 25, 2008, 10:09 PM
    Quote from: BerberElla on March 25, 2008, 09:16 PM
    Quote from: cosmicdancer on March 25, 2008, 09:05 PM


    You are the one they run to - you are a good person Berbs and they know it - unfortunately good people also get taken advantage of.


    They do, but I am not as susceptible to it anymore, I learnt along time to not care about being alone anymore, and that was the only thing that made me so easy to take advantage of, this need for companionship, friends and family at whatever cost.

    My other brother may have taken the piss towards the end, but it was a fast end, I put my foot down and kicked him out in a heartbeat, before I would have given chance after chance, now there are limited chances, and sometimes no chances.

    I am not as forgiving as I once was, I am tougher than I once was, this I think stands me in good stead even if I am alone, it's on my terms and out of choice.

    If this brother tries to take the piss, I will withdraw my generous spirit to his loss, not mine.  Afro


    Good for you - that's the right attitude.
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