I know some people here were waiting for me to tell my story, so here it goes!
I was interested in learning about other religions since I was 11 years old, mainly because I used to like reading fantasy stories, especially the ones that some people actually believe in. So when I was 11, used to read stuff in the internet whenever I was bored, and the first weird shit I read about was said to be satanism... really turned out to be some sort of sick religion where people sacrifice other people and carve some wicca star on the chest of the victims, they have sex in coffins, and say the devil told them to... Now I was 11, so I was like 'WOOOAAAH!'. From that day I started reading about other faiths, and got to read about the REAL Satanism, which was actually a philosophy.
When I turned 12, my family moved back to Saudi (in Jeddah and Taif). I lived close to a younger cousin of mine who's dad was a religious freak. This kid told me a lot of stuff in Islam that my parents never taught me before, like music is haram, Gog and Magog (he told me a really fucked up story about them), that pictures of people and animals was haram.
Over the years in Jeddah and Taif, I kept asking religious teachers a lot of questions, like:
- Predestination: what about the people who are bound to die as unbelievers? Isn't that unfair?
- Mohammed's marriage to Aisha: even if they were 'meant to be', why at a very young age?
- Priority: What about a non-muslim person was very nice and kind during his/her life, and dies without converting to Islam?
- why did god create us only to test us?
...and many many more. But I was still very religious at that time.
I came back to Canada right a month before my 17th birthday, and started 12th grade there. I was suffering from depression a social anxiety, so I mostly stayed at home just reading from the internet.
One day I was browsing some Islamic stuff on youtube. The first time I knew about Bill Maher was when I saw him arguing with Mos Def on Real time. The guy who posted the clip wanted to show how a Muslim like Mos Def 'wins' against a non-beleiver like Bill, to prove how flawless Islam is. I was like "Yes! We always win!'. But I would sometimes go back to this clip and watch it again (a boring habit I do), and I noticed it was actually the other way around, Mos Def wasn't able to defend Islam. I Became more interested in Bill Maher, and watched his comedy standup, which led me to discover George Carlin. I was really interested in what they say about religion. And it started out with me thinking "Even though I'm a muslim, this guy does kinda make a point here..."... the more 'points' I heard them make, the more unsure I became about my faith. I started to watch documentaries and debates about religion and atheism. And when I took 12th grade biology (which I dropped out), I learned what evolution really was.
I stayed one more year in high school to take extra courses. Once in gym class, 2 guys asked me if I really believed in Islam, I said yes. "So you actually believe in 72 virgins in heaven?" Dammit! I knew that Islam was useless if I didn't believe in everything it says, so I said....."yes". While I was walking back home after school I was yelling to myself in my head "WHY AM I STILL BELIEVING IN ALL THIS?"...it was fear, fear that I might be wrong if I stopped believing. But I didn't didn't like lying to myself, I had to admit inside that I was seeing something wrong here. I recalled everything I ever learned from the books and articles I have read, from the debates, speeches, and documentaries I have seen. In my last day of being a muslim, I had to ask myself this question: "What if I was born and raised in another faith, would I see Islam as something unique, special and different from the others, and thus convert?" I had to think about it for a long time to give myself an honest answer...."No" I said. If I cant agree to everything in Islam, then there is no point in believing it. And if it was man who created religion, it was also man who created God. And I suddenly became an atheist, without going through deism or anything in the process.
There you have it folks! I tried to keep the story as short as possible, so as not to bore you with too many details. Hope you enjoyed reading it!
Questions? Comments?
Before I start this post and the content it contains are not to mock you or anyone on this forum but are rather questions that I need to ask for my self
Hey, I am Agnostic, and I just found out about this forum and this is my first post so I don't want to get rude.
But I think Mohamed married that girl when she was 17-19( I found a link with "proof)
And don't people who don't know about the Islam or are born ( or get a) with a mental disease immediately go to heaven?
Also where does it say that you get 72 virgins in the Quran ( I honestly don't know since I never really read it)
Have you ever read anything about Islam it self or did you watch videos of people defending or mocking religion in general.
Once again This is not to re-convert you, this is all for my self, I need a better understanding of going from Islam to Atheism.
