You are a very perceptive chap - I don't think even I have analysed my reasons that well - or at least not understood them properly - but yes I think you have a point. It is at least part of my problem with the existence of a God, particularly one who keeps repeating how merciful, compassionate, forgiving etc.. he is, ad nauseum. My problem is that we must take his word for it - and discount my observations - and take on faith he has a damn good reason.
And no other god, even one you dream up, can solve the Problem of Evil! To you, it would seem that if God exists, any God at all, then He must be a *monster* for allowing all this suffering to go around in the world, and you don't want to worship a monster! That's why you can't committ to Deism, for example.