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 Topic: You know you're an ex muslim when......

 (Read 184121 times)
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  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1110 - June 24, 2013, 07:52 PM
    When you are browsing CEMB forums while your entire family is busy praying for Shab-e-barat.
    "If only closed minds
    had closed mouths."
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1111 - June 26, 2013, 06:34 AM
    when you use pseudonyms when you're on forums xD
    Tell people that there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you.

    Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.
    - George Carlin
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1112 - July 05, 2013, 01:35 AM
    Quote from: happymurtad on June 19, 2013, 08:54 PM
    When you realize it’s been years since you’ve lifted your foot into a sink.

     


    You should do wuzu just for old times sake lol
    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1113 - July 20, 2013, 04:36 PM
    You know your an ex muslim when...


    You run for the kitchen as soon as your family leaves the house during Ramadan.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1114 - July 20, 2013, 05:03 PM
    Quote from: Sam Brent on June 26, 2013, 06:34 AM
    when you use pseudonyms when you're on forums xD

    damn right  Afro

    you know you're an ex-muslim when you don't give a damn about anything fard anymore
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1115 - July 20, 2013, 05:39 PM
    When you wear a skirt and don't care if anyone can see your legs.
    Rhett Butler: With enough courage, you can do without a reputation.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1116 - July 21, 2013, 09:40 PM
    You can fantasise about females and not feel guilty
    You have to explain to your non Muslim friends why you still where a hijab even though you're an atheist
    You have a stash of food in your room so you don't have to starve during Ramadan
    You have to still greet other Muslims with salaam otherwise they'll sarkliy say salaam to you
    You get told that haribos have gelatine in them by the non Muslim cashier at the store and you just shrug and say its fine
    You pretend to be asleep after Iftar so you don't have to do taraweeh

  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1117 - July 21, 2013, 11:24 PM
    when you get annoyed with Muslim acquaintances who try to rationalize pointless religious rules with misguided evidence
    (eg, that Muslim acquaintance on Facebook who always links to articles about how pigs are filthy and pork is horrible for you and will liquefy your insides)
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1118 - July 22, 2013, 06:29 AM
    I wonder why the creator of all things forbade pig and not chicken, considering how much more dangerous than pig chicken can be if not kept and cooked correctly. Guess when you're the only god there is you need to find a few ways to make yourself chuckle.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1119 - July 22, 2013, 10:47 AM
    When you duck behind nearest shopping aisle of local super market with crate of beer in hand, mid afternoon, Ramadan, before heading on summer holiday, to avoid being busted by pious muslim neighbours.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1120 - July 22, 2013, 12:29 PM
    Quote from: Quod Sum Eris on July 22, 2013, 06:29 AM
    I wonder why the creator of all things forbade pig and not chicken, considering how much more dangerous than pig chicken can be if not kept and cooked correctly. Guess when you're the only god there is you need to find a few ways to make yourself chuckle.


    I saw a program about tropical diseases, in it a woman had visited a country in Africa, she had eaten some pork there and after her return to UK started experiencing epileptic fits. Her brain was infected with the pig tapeworm, it is the only tapeworm that does this. There is something about the biology of pigs that makes it similar in some ways to humans, that is why the tapeworm gets confused into traveling up to the brain of humans instead of just infecting the gut. Also, pigs are used for human heart valve transplants because of the biological similarities.
    People who have been forced to resort to cannibalism, like that survivors of Uruguayan Air Force Flight 571, later describe the taste of human flesh being similar to that of pig.

    Now imagine a few thousand years ago when it was noticed that people who were eating pigs sometimes acted like they were possessed by demons and then died (because of the epilepsy and cysticercosis) this was not as simple as eating a bit of bad chicken and getting a belly ache, mix that with possibly meeting some cannibals who love eating pigs too because it reminds them of eating other people, this would make clerics and rulers want to ban the practice of eating pigs. So that's why they came up with the idea that the creator of all things forbade pig.

    You know you're an ex-muslim when you can't eat pork, not because allah forbade it, but because of neuroses created from knowing the above.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1121 - July 22, 2013, 12:34 PM
    You know you're an ex-muslim when you say, "fuck your neuroses, give me pork anyway" Tongue
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1122 - September 08, 2013, 10:10 PM
    Quote from: Al-Alethia on December 23, 2012, 06:09 AM
    ^My mum's considering getting Somali TV  mysmilie_977 There's crappy MidEastern/Turkish soap operas dubbed in Somali, news channels from the motherland and...wait for it...Islamic channels. Over react FSM help me; I don't think she's serious though, she brings it up occasionally but it's never materialized.


    Which turkish soap operas? i am curious...
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1123 - September 17, 2013, 03:01 PM
    ^ I don't know what they're called! Somali housewives love them but my mum's plans never materialised so yay for us.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1124 - October 04, 2013, 02:54 PM
    You know your an ex muslim when you die a little inside when you hear your toddler cousin use the word kaffir when referring to non muslims.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1125 - October 04, 2013, 06:00 PM
     Cry
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1126 - October 04, 2013, 06:07 PM
    @Dark rebel
    I was at my cousins house talking about greek mythology a few months ago. As we were chatting I was talking about all of what each deity could do. Suddenly my little cousin just comes up to me and says "there is only 1 god and that is Allah SWT". The kid was just 8 years old. I kinda wanted to just tell him Allah seems to be zeus in sura 13:13. I also wanted to tell him that Allah seems to be no different then any other god. Instead I bit my tongue. I didn't want to let everybody I know that I don't believe. But I really wish that I could have said something that would have broken the indoctrination. I wish I could've said something. I'm very open with friends of mine at university (as long as they aren't Muslim). But the people I care for most I can't be myself around whilst the people that I probably wont know in 20 years seem to know my beliefs better then the ones I care for more (except my fiancé). Its just really hard to see young siblings, doing and saying the same things you said as a kid.
    Tell people that there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you.

    Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.
    - George Carlin
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1127 - October 05, 2013, 03:34 AM
    Sam Brent, you just echoed literally everything I feel about my own situation (in regard to my apostasy and how I deal with it around my family and younger siblings/cousins).
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1128 - October 05, 2013, 06:01 PM
    Quote from: Sam Brent on October 04, 2013, 06:07 PM
    @Dark rebel
    I was at my cousins house talking about greek mythology a few months ago. As we were chatting I was talking about all of what each deity could do. Suddenly my little cousin just comes up to me and says "there is only 1 god and that is Allah SWT". The kid was just 8 years old. I kinda wanted to just tell him Allah seems to be zeus in sura 13:13. I also wanted to tell him that Allah seems to be no different then any other god. Instead I bit my tongue. I didn't want to let everybody I know that I don't believe. But I really wish that I could have said something that would have broken the indoctrination. I wish I could've said something. I'm very open with friends of mine at university (as long as they aren't Muslim). But the people I care for most I can't be myself around whilst the people that I probably wont know in 20 years seem to know my beliefs better then the ones I care for more (except my fiancé). Its just really hard to see young siblings, doing and saying the same things you said as a kid.


    I am so sorry for you. On the bright side, you are still there, caring about them, and offering support for all the things that happen in life. If they begin to doubt, or neglect their Islamic duties, you will be the one in the family that is still supportive and not critical. That will mean a great deal.
    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1129 - October 05, 2013, 07:12 PM
    You kow you are an ex-muslim, when you get beheaded for leaving Islam.
    I ask many stupid questions frequently.
    I am curious, that's why I ask many questions.
    I am overly curious, that's why I ask stupid questions.
    I lack patience, that's why I ask frequently.
    So forgive me and answer me Smiley
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1130 - October 05, 2013, 08:28 PM
    you know you're an ex-muslim:
    -when you start thinking "why do i have to make this random movements while praying?
    -why do i have to pray in arabic?
    -why is god so human?
    -why aren't the prayers working?
    -why god is just a fiction?
    -why mo was a pedophile?
    and the list goes on...
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1131 - October 05, 2013, 11:24 PM
    Do these people really deserve to go to hell?
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1132 - October 06, 2013, 09:21 AM
    Quote from: Sam Brent on October 04, 2013, 06:07 PM
    @Dark rebel
    I was at my cousins house talking about greek mythology a few months ago. As we were chatting I was talking about all of what each deity could do. Suddenly my little cousin just comes up to me and says "there is only 1 god and that is Allah SWT". The kid was just 8 years old. I kinda wanted to just tell him Allah seems to be zeus in sura 13:13. I also wanted to tell him that Allah seems to be no different then any other god. Instead I bit my tongue. I didn't want to let everybody I know that I don't believe. But I really wish that I could have said something that would have broken the indoctrination. I wish I could've said something. I'm very open with friends of mine at university (as long as they aren't Muslim). But the people I care for most I can't be myself around whilst the people that I probably wont know in 20 years seem to know my beliefs better then the ones I care for more (except my fiancé). Its just really hard to see young siblings, doing and saying the same things you said as a kid.


    The Romans used water as a weapon of war, sometimes they would build a dam then break it to cause a flood, other times use water to gently wear away at something.  Maybe just talking about the true gods and their exploits is enough to start weakening the foundations. give gifts of stories of the Greek myths?
    When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.


    A.A. Milne,

    "We cannot slaughter each other out of the human impasse"
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1133 - October 06, 2013, 09:57 AM
    Quote from: Al-Alethia on September 17, 2013, 03:01 PM
    ^ I don't know what they're called! Somali housewives love them but my mum's plans never materialised so yay for us.

    Ewwwww, those! My mum used to watch it everyday on tv but now shes watching them online, Always hogging the computer.. Ugh those shitty voices and an even more shitty childrens voice, why can't they just use REAL childrens to voice them!?

    @thread: lets see, you know you're an ex muslim when you dont give a fuck about religious debates?
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1134 - October 06, 2013, 06:44 PM
    Quote from: Quod Sum Eris on October 05, 2013, 11:24 PM
    Do these people really deserve to go to hell?

    which people man?
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1135 - October 06, 2013, 06:57 PM
    None muslims, bad muslims, whoever it was you were taught is going to hell for whatever bullshit reason. You know you're an ex-muslim when you start to question if these people really deserve to go to hell. I like your new avatar by the way.
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1136 - October 06, 2013, 07:03 PM
    I think it's stupid to threaten an atheist, when he\she doesn't believe in the exixstence of  hell anymore  Cheesy
    lol thanks  Tongue
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1137 - October 06, 2013, 07:59 PM
    Quote from: moi on October 06, 2013, 09:21 AM
    The Romans used water as a weapon of war, sometimes they would build a dam then break it to cause a flood, other times use water to gently wear away at something.  Maybe just talking about the true gods and their exploits is enough to start weakening the foundations. give gifts of stories of the Greek myths?


    That is kind of my approach to all of this. I hope they will see the same thing. It is kind of funny that my family and I don't have really different political views. But when it comes to religion, its way different.
    Tell people that there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you.

    Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.
    - George Carlin
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1138 - October 06, 2013, 11:43 PM
    You know you're an ex-muslim when your mum decides to change the channel to Peace TV resulting in you wanting to grab the TV and smash it onto the ground after torturously hearing the monotone voice of Zakir sNaik.

    When you decide to watch porn and have a wank in your room, despite the Quran casually laying on your shelf opposite you along with a poster stating "Remember, Allah is watching you" (conveniently placed by my mum), and not giving a single fuck.
  • You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #1139 - October 07, 2013, 04:08 AM
    Quote
    along with a poster stating "Remember, Allah is watching you"


    Anyone else read that and immediately think of North Korea?
    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
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