Wait wait wait wait. Just hang on a tick. The story of the flood came because some peasants back in the bronze age thought a local flood was global, but the bible is still divinely inspired? That's just...what?
Seriously, how can you not see this?
It's really quite simple. The Bible is divinely inspired. This means all the good bits that make sense were God's bits. All the bad bits, or the bits that don't make sense, were someone else's fuckups.
How do we know this? Because God doesn't make fuckups, of course. Duh. Couldn't someone have done some of the good bits off their own bat? No way. Good stuff comes from God. Humans are teh crap, mate. So, any good bits must be God's bits.
So what about the bad bits? Well, they're not God's problem. You have to blame someone else for those. But God created the fuckers what made teh fuckups, right? And he knew what he was doing, right? So he must be responsible, yes?
No. No no no no no. God is totally not responsible for any of teh fuckups made by critters what he deliberately made all fucked up. He can punish them for being fucked up though. That's totally cool.
Also, since we obviously have to use our own fallible and deliberately fucked up judgement to decide which bits are good bits and which bits aren't, this totally means that any bits we currently think are bad bits can't be God's bits. God is really really nice n stuff. Really.