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Theme Changer

 Topic: You know you're an ex muslim when......

 (Read 184497 times)
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  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #90 - January 24, 2009, 02:49 PM

    You know you're an ex muslim when......

    you really begin to enjoy stress-free farting.



    LOL!  Cheesy

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    The sleeper has awakened -  Dune

    Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish!
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #91 - January 24, 2009, 05:35 PM

    The rest of humanity got some splainin to do yes
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #92 - January 24, 2009, 06:06 PM

    I feel good about myself now, but not the rest of humanity :(


    Most of humanity are fine, its just the vocal ignorant few that are the problem.  The rest are generally good & decent, so no need to worry.

    My Book     news002       
    My Blog  pccoffee
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #93 - January 24, 2009, 07:55 PM

    You know you're an ex-muslim when...

    you realise Allah is a complete arsehole!
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #94 - January 24, 2009, 09:49 PM

    You know you're an ex-muslim when...

    you realise Allah is a complete arsehole!

    And when you realise nobody deserves to be called God/Allah.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #95 - January 24, 2009, 11:40 PM

    you know its funny cause I cant relate to half the things posted here. Though I grew up in a muslim household I never truly believed in it so i never really cared if the Quran was lying on the floor or whether or not my wudhu was still intact.. or whether there was a strand of hair showing while I pretended to pray...  whistling2

    the things a i can most relate to have to do with having a muslim identity (or no longer having one tht is).



    Quod est inferius est sicut quod est superius,
    et quod est superius est sicut quod est inferius,
    ad perpetranda miracula rei unius.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #96 - January 27, 2009, 07:52 PM

    I can relate except for the:

    ''You turn every conversation into a "did you know mohammed this, and did you know mohammed that" scene.''
    I find it an ineffective method, I prefer science and logic.

    You finally own a mini skirt or two.
    I am a guy Tongue
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #97 - January 27, 2009, 07:56 PM


    I am a guy Tongue


    A hot one at that too Phwoar lol

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #98 - January 27, 2009, 07:56 PM

    Quote
    You finally own a mini skirt or two.
    I am a guy


    But now that you're not bound by that whole "men shouldn't dress like women" thing, you can wear a mini skirt (or two).

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #99 - January 27, 2009, 07:57 PM

    And? Cheesy

    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #100 - January 27, 2009, 07:58 PM


    But now that you're not bound by that whole "men shouldn't dress like women" thing, you can wear a mini skirt (or two).


    Awesome  Cheesy

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #101 - January 27, 2009, 08:00 PM

    A Scottish skirt maybe  Wink
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #102 - January 27, 2009, 08:02 PM

    A Scottish skirt maybe  Wink



    A kilt.  Yes,  but you do know you're not allowed to wear anything underneath, (not being rude, its a Scottish tradition).

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #103 - January 27, 2009, 08:06 PM

    Men in kilts Phwoar lol as long as the rest looks good though, otherwise the effect gets spoiled.  parrot

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #104 - January 27, 2009, 08:40 PM

    Men in kilts Phwoar lol as long as the rest looks good though, otherwise the effect gets spoiled.  parrot

    Ewan McGregor  yes

    "Poor human nature, what horrible crimes have been committed in thy name!"
    - Emma Goldman
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #105 - February 09, 2009, 02:36 PM

    You know your an ex (soon?) muslim when....

    1. the adhan begins and you dont turn off the music... dance or
    2. stop canoodling... Roll Eyes
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #106 - February 09, 2009, 06:45 PM

    You know you're an ex-muslim when:

    you don't know when sunrise and sunset are anymore.

    I chose to get circumcised at 17, don't tell me I never believed.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #107 - February 12, 2009, 04:27 AM

    you know when youre an ex-muslim (girl) when you're actually thankful for your period so you can get out of prayer and reading.  Cheesy

    that was actually the only good thing about being a muslim girl, you get a free excuse every month...  Roll Eyes



    Quod est inferius est sicut quod est superius,
    et quod est superius est sicut quod est inferius,
    ad perpetranda miracula rei unius.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #108 - February 12, 2009, 11:32 AM

    you know when youre an ex-muslim (girl) when you're actually thankful for your period so you can get out of prayer and reading.  Cheesy

    that was actually the only good thing about being a muslim girl, you get a free excuse every month...  Roll Eyes


    Yeah, but then the beardos turn around and use that excuse as reasoning for why women are supposedly lacking more in faith than men.  finmad

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    The sleeper has awakened -  Dune

    Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish!
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #109 - February 12, 2009, 03:57 PM

    Yeah, but then the beardos turn around and use that excuse as reasoning for why women are supposedly lacking more in faith than men.  finmad

    ===========

    Which is frustrating, and Mo. was very retarded when he answered the women in the Hadith.!

    "I'm Agnostic about God."

    Richard Dawkins
    ==
    "If there is a God, it has to be a man; no woman could or would ever fuck things up like this."
     George Carlin == "...The so-called moderates are actually the public relations arm of Al-Qaeda and the Islamic Republic of Iran."  Maryam Namazie
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #110 - February 12, 2009, 04:39 PM

    Oh, I have another one:

    You know you're an ex Muslim when...

    ...you still wash the right side of your body first then the left side when taking a shower.

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    The sleeper has awakened -  Dune

    Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish!
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #111 - February 12, 2009, 07:33 PM

    Oh, I have another one:

    You know you're an ex Muslim when...

    ...you still wash the right side of your body first then the left side when taking a shower.


    lol...

    Actually, I still always give or take things with my right hand.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #112 - February 24, 2009, 10:54 PM

    You know you're an ex muslim when......

    You watch the match without praying to God Tongue
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #113 - February 24, 2009, 10:56 PM

    You know you're an ex-Muslim when you're not afraid to read the most uncomfortable things in the Quran or Hadith (eg hellfire)... because you just know it's not true!  Smiley

    .
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #114 - March 05, 2009, 08:43 PM

    You know you're an ex-muslim when...

    you realise Allah is a complete arsehole!

    That's because he lives next door to a prick, and has a complete cunt living downstairs from him!

    "At 8:47 I do a grenade jump off a ladder."
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #115 - April 15, 2009, 06:51 PM

    OT'ish:
    If you let one rip, do those around you also become unclean, and what's the policy on owning up to it?
    Do you get punished if you say, perhaps even with pride, "That one was me!"?
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #116 - April 15, 2009, 07:42 PM

    OT'ish:
    If you let one rip, do those around you also become unclean, and what's the policy on owning up to it?
    Do you get punished if you say, perhaps even with pride, "That one was me!"?

    The official Islamic policy on farting is that it haraam to laugh at farts. 

    Producing wind means your wuddu is broken, but provided you dont leave any splatter on your guests, then they remain clean.  However if you are planning to pray, you should replace your underwear if you produce a wet one.

    My advice is to do a reverse fart (suck it back into your system), and then let it all out after prayers.

    My Book     news002       
    My Blog  pccoffee
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #117 - April 15, 2009, 07:48 PM

    Quote
    The official Islamic policy on farting is that it haraam to laugh at farts. 



      Cheesy

    What happens if you fart while you're in the middle of laughing? 

    "Befriend them not, Oh murtads, and give them neither parrot nor bunny."  - happymurtad's advice on trolls.
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #118 - April 15, 2009, 09:43 PM

    Quote
    The official Islamic policy on farting is that it haraam to laugh at farts. 



      Cheesy

    What happens if you fart while you're in the middle of laughing? 


    Then you get a very interesting sounding fart!  Wink

    I would imagine the ulama or whoever deals with farting issues would see farting during laughing as a consequence of laughing at someone else's fart.

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

    The sleeper has awakened -  Dune

    Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish!
  • Re: You know you're an ex muslim when......
     Reply #119 - May 10, 2009, 07:55 AM

    I cant help but hide a sadistic grin on my face when ever my Muslim friends try quoting the example of Quran and Hadith

    bear in mind, apart from online and family, none of my friends know I am an ex-Muslim  whistling2

    Pakistan Zindabad? ya Pakistan sey Zinda bhaag?

    Long Live Pakistan? Or run with your lives from Pakistan?
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